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BUSINESS  LETTERS 

HOW  TO  WRITE  THEM 


Business  Letters 

HOW  TO  WRITE  THEM 


BY 

TIM  THRIFT 

ADVERTISING    MANAGER,    THE   AMERICAN    MULTIGRAPH 

SALES   COMPANY,    CLEVELAND 

DIRECTOR,    CLEVELAND   ADVERTISING   CLUB 


BENJAMIN  J.  CAMPBELL 

AUTHOR   OP 

''modern   BUSINESS    PUNCTUATION" 

'"DRILLS    IN   THE    USE    OF   CORRECT   ENGLISH" 

JOINT   AUTHOR   OF 
"essentials    OF  BUSINESS   ENGLISH*' 

AND 

BRUCE  L.  VASS 

JOINT    AUTHOR    OF 

"essentials   OF   BUSINESS   ENGLISH" 


BUSINESS  ENGLISH  PUBLISHING  COMPANY 
JACKSON,  MICHIGAN 


^' 


fA 


Copyright  19 16 

BY 
BUSINESS   ENGLISH   PUBLISHING  COMPANY 

EDUCATION  DEPi; 


INTRODUCTORY 


The  ability  to  write  a  good  business  letter  is  an  accom= 
plishment  highly  prized  in  the  modern  business  world. 
Many  great  houses  depend  upon  their  correspondence  for 
their  business.  In  such  cases  the  letter-writers  are  most 
important  factors  in  the  organization.  Innumerable  oc- 
casions arise  when  a  business  house  would  give  almost 
anything  for  a  "good  letter"  to  suit  the  occasion.  Thou- 
sands of  business  men  are  striving  continuouslv  to  improve 
the  style  and  character  of  their  letters.  P'or  all  these  reasons, 
Business  Correspondence  is  a  desirable  subject  of  study. 
It  can  be  made  to  pay  large  dividends  on  a  small  invest- 
ment of  time  and  labor.  The  young  man  who  can  write 
a  good  letter  soon  becomes  a  marked  man,  if  not  a  man  of 
mark.  He  is  sure  to  be  a  "picked"  man;  and  if  he  con- 
tinues to  cultivate  the  accomplishment,. he  may  reap  large 
rewards. 

— Thomas  H.  Russell. 


54PJ70 


CONTENTS 


Page 

Abbreviations,  uses  of 43 

Names  of  the  States 44 

Names  of  the  Months , 44 

Commercial  Terms 45 

Acknowledging  Orders 64 

Acknowledging  Remittances 65 

Adjustment  Letters 103 

Capitalization 48 

Collection  Letters Ill 

Composition  of  the  Letter 17 

Unity  of  the  Sentence 17 

Clearness 20 

Position  of  Adverbs  and  Adjectives 20 

Position  of  Phrases  and  Clauses 21 

Position  of  Correlative  Conjunctions 22' 

Antecedent  of  the  Personal  Pronoun 22 

Repetition  of  Important  Elements 22 

Miscellaneous  Principles 24 

Effectiveness 30 

Parallelism 30 

Repetition  for  Emphasis 30 

Repetitions  to  be  Avoided 30 

Brevity 32 

The  Conversational  Style 32 

Tone  and  Individuality 33 

Compound  Words 38 

Enclosures 65 

Envelope  Address 13 

Figures,  uses  of 47 

Folding 12 

Letters  Ordering  Goods 62 

Letters  of  Recommendation 67 

Letters  of  Introduction 68 

Letters  of  Application 70 

Mechanical  Make-up 59 

Paragraphing 58 


contents 

Page 

Parts  of  a  Letter .    1 

The  Heading : 1 

The  Introductory  Address 4 

The  Salutation 5 

.    The  Complimentary  Close 9 

The  Signature • 10 

Punctuation 48 

The  Comma 50 

Series  of  Words  or  Phrases 50 

Transposed  Phrases  and  Clauses 50 

Parenthetical  Words  and  Phrases. 51 

Intermediate  Expressions 51 

Nouns  in  Apposition • 52 

Nouns  of  Address 52 

Compound  Sentences 52 

Adverbial  and  Relative  Clauses 53 

Omission  of  the  Verb 53 

Complex  Subject 53 

Quotations 54 

Ambiguity 54 

Words  or  Phrases  in  Pairs 54 

Contrasted  Words  or  Phrases 54 

The  Semicolon 54 

The  Colon 55 

The  Period 56 

The  Interrogation  Point 56 

The  Exclamation  Point 57 

The  Dash 57 

Quotation  Marks 57 

Sales  Letters 75 

Art  of  Securing  Attention , 78 

Arousing  Interest  and  Holding  It 84 

How  to  Create  Desire 89 

The  Close— How  to  Get  Action 96 

Subscriptions 64 

Syllabication 42 

Titles,  uses  of 6 

Official  Position 7 

Official  Titles 7 

Doubling  Titles 8 


-      THE  PARTS  OF  A  LETTER 

Custom  requires  that  the  business  letter  shall  follow 
certain  prescribed  forms,  and  any  deviation  from  these  is 
likely  to  create  an  unfavorable  impression. 

The  business  letter  consists  of  six  distinct  parts,  each 
of  which  merits  careful  study.    These  are — 


1. 

The  heading. 

2. 

The  introductory  address. 

3. 

The  salutation. 

4. 

The  body. 

5. 

The  complimentary  close. 

6. 

The  signature. 

The  Heading 

The  heading  consists  of  the  address  of  the  writer  and  the 
date.  If  the  writer's  address  is  a  large  city,  the  heading 
should  contain  the  street  and  number,  or  the  post-office 
box.  If  the  address  is  a  small  place,  the  name  of  the  county 
should  be  given.  If  the  letter  is  written  from  a  club,  college, 
hotel  or  the  like,  the  heading  should  contain  this  information. 

Position  of  the  heading. — The  heading  should  begin  at 
least  two  inches  from  the  top  of  the  page,  and  should  not 
extend  to  the  left  of  the  middle  of  the  page,  nor  beyond 
the  right-hand  margin.  It  may  occupy  one,  two,  or  even 
three  lines,  depending  upon  the  width  of  the  page  and  the 
information  given.  When  the  heading  requires  more  than 
one  line,  the  date,  consisting  of  the  month,  the  day  of  the 
month,  and  the  year,  is  written  on  the  last  line. 

Punctuation. — The  parts  of  the  heading  are  separated 
by  commas,  and  a  period  is  placed  at  the  end.  Observe 
that  no  comma  is  used  between  the  month  and  the  day  of 


BUSINESS  LETTERS:  HOW  TO  WRITE  THEM 


Letterhead 


Date 


Introductory 
address 


Salutation 


Body  of  the 
letter 


Compliment- 
ary close 

Signature 


HAMPSHIRE    PAPER    COMPANY 

MAKERS   OF 

OLD  HAMPSHIRE   BOND 

South  Haduey  Falls.  Mass. 

March    20,    1916. 


Mr,  Honry  J.  Cameron,  Manager, 
Acme  Mfg.  Company, 

Portland,  Oregon. 

Dear  Sir: 

There  is  just  one  more  point  In  con- 
nection with  Old  Hampshire  Bond  that  we 
should  like  to  take  up  with  you. 

Don't  lose  the  perspective.   Don't 
consider  that  because  the  amount  of  sta- 
tionery you  use  is  large  that  you  can't 
afford  Old  Hampshire  Bond. 

If  Old  Hampshire  is  profitable  to  a 
concern  writing  five  letters  a  day,  it 
is  ten  times  more  so  where  fifty  letters 
are  v/rltten.   You  see  all  the  letters, 
but  the  man  you  are  writing  to  sees  but 
one  of  them.   And  suppose  he  is  just  the 
roan  you  want  most  to  influence. 

If  the  request  meets  your  approval, 
we  should  appreciate  an  expression  from 
you  regarding  Old  Hampshire  Bond. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Hampshire  Paper  Company, 


THE  HEADING  3 

the  month,  or  between  the  number  and  the  name  of  the 
street.  Observe  also  that  a  period  is  placed  after  all  abbre- 
viations, and  that  when  an  abbreviation  comes  at  the  end 
of  any  part  except  the  last,  it  is  followed  by  a  period  and 
a  comma. 

The  following  models  illustrate  the  correct  forms  for 
the  heading  of  a  letter : 

(1) 
Lynn,  Mass.,  March  24,  1916. 
or 
Lynn,  Massachusetts, 
March  24,  1916. 

(2) 
1224  Woodward  Avenue, 

Detroit,  Michigan, 
Feb.  5,  1915. 

(3) 
University  of  Michigan, 

Ann  Arbor,  Michigan, 
May  4,  1916. 

(4) 
Box  351,  Atlanta,  Ga*, 
June  24,  1915. 

Notes 

1.  The  name  of  the  city  should  never  be  abbreviated.  The  name 
of  the  state,  if  long,  may  be  abbreviated.  Ohio,  Iowa,  Maine,  Idaho, 
Utah,  and  Oregon  should  not  be  abbreviated. 

2.  Th,  st,  and  d  should  not  be  used  in  the  heading  after  the  day 
of  the  month.    Write  July  2^,191 5,  not  July  21tih,  1 91 5. 

3.  The  date  should  be  written  in  full;  as,  July  2I4.,  1916,  not 
7 1 2k lie,  nor  July  2k,  '16. 

4.  May,  June,  and  July  should  not  be  abbreviated.  The  other 
months  may  be  abbreviated,  but  generally  it  is  better  to  write  March, 
April,  and  August  in  full. 

5.  When  a  letterhead  is  used,  the  date  should,  as  a  rule,  be 
written  about  two  spaces — one-third  of  an  inch — below  the  last  line 
of  the  letterhead.  The  date  should  not  be  written  on  a  line  with  the 
last  line  of  the  letterhead,  because  it  destroys  the  symmetry  of  the 
letterhead,  and  because  the  typewritten  part  does  not  harmonize 
with  the  printed  part. 


4  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Exercise  1 

Write  the  following  headings,  referring  to  the  models  for 
the  proper  position,  arrangement,  punctuation,  and  capitali- 
zation : 

1.  arcanum  ohio  april  15  1916. 

2.  1245  east  main  st  may  2  1916  jackson  michigan. 

3.  grayson  county  galax  may  22  1915  Virginia. 

4.  albany  n  y  box  431  aug  21  1915. 

5.  detroit  mich  314  majestic  building  June  24  1915. 

6.  June  18  masonic  temple  X915  st  louis  missouri. 

The  Introductory  Address 

The  introductory  address  consists  of  the  name  and  title, 
and  the  address  of  the  person  to  whom  the  letter  is  written. 
It  may  consist  of  two,  three,  or  even  four  lines.  In  business 
correspondence  it  precedes  the  body  of  the  letter  and  should 
begin  from  six  to  nine  spaces — one  to  one  and  one-half 
inches — below  the  date  line.  In  social  and  official  cor- 
respondence, it  is  placed  below  the  body  of  the  letter,  begin- 
ning at  the  left-hand  margin. 

The  following  models  illustrate  the  correct  forms  for  the 
introductory  address : 
(1) 

Mr.  W.  L.  Wallace, 

Philadelphia,  Pa. 

(2) 
Mr.  Henry  B.  Joy,  President, 

Packard  Motor  Car  Company, 
Detroit,  Michigan. 

(3) 
Mesara.  McQuillan  &  Harriaon, 
Jackson,  Michigan. 

(4) 
The  Lammera-Shilling  Co., 
Chicago,  111. 

(5) 
Meaara.  E.  P.  Button  &  Co., 
661  Fifth  Avenue, 
Hew  York,  N.  Y. 


THE  SALUTATION  5 

Punctuation. — A  comma  should  be  placed  at  the  end  of 
each  line  of  the  introductory  address  except  the  last, 
which  should  be  followed  by  a  period.  If  a  title,  such  as 
Secretary,  President,  or  Manager,  is  used  after  the  name,  a 
comma  should  be  placed  between  the  name  and  the  title. 

Notes 

1.  The  second  line  of  the  address  should  be  indented  the  same  as 
the  first  line  of  each  paragraph — either  five  or  ten  spaces  on  the  type- 
writer. If  the  address  consists  of  three  lines,  the  third  line  should  begin 
a  corresponding  distance  to  the  right  of  the  second  line. 

2.  The  form  shown  in  Model  5,  called  the  block  style,  is  now  used 
quite  extensively.  While  this  form  saves  a  little  time,  many  use  it 
only  in  letters  in  which  no  indentations  are  made  for  paragraphs. 

The  Salutation 

The  salutation  is  the  term  of  respect  or  courtesy  used  to 
introduce  the  letter.  It  is  placed  below  the  address  and  is 
begun  at  the  left-hand  margin.  The  choice  of  the  salu- 
tation depends  on  the  degree  of  familiarity  existing  between 
the  correspondents. 

The  following  models  illustrate  the  correct  forms  for 
the  introductory  address  and  the  salutation: 

(1) 
dr.  John  H,  Benson, 

Chicago,  Illinois. 

Dear  Sir: 

(2) 
Miss  Mary  Littler, 

Denver,  Colorado. 

Dear  Madam: 

or 
Dear  Miss  Littler: 

(3) 
The  Galax  Hardware  Company, 
Galax,  Virginia, 

Gentlemen: 


6  BUSINESS  LETTERS:  HOW  TO  WRITE  THEM 

Punctuation. — The  salutation  is  followed  by  a  colon.  A 
colon  and  a  dash,  or  a  comma  and  a  dash  may  be  used, 
but  the  colon  is  preferable. 

Notes 

1.  The  proper  salutation  of  a  purely  business  letter  is  Dear  Sir 
or  Gentlemen.  Dear  Sirs,  once  considered  good  usage,  is  now  obsolete. 
Where  a  cordial  relation  exists,  it  is  permissible  to  use  My  dear  Sir  or 
Dear  Mr.  Blank. 

2.  Sir  or  Sirs  is  used  only  in  official  or  very  formal  correspondence. 

3.  The  salutations.  Dear  Friend,  My  dear  Friend,  Dear  Hall,  etc., 
show  affectionate  regard,  and  should  be  confined  to  social  letters. 

4.  When  addressing  a  woman,  either  married  or  unmarried,  the 
correct  salutation  is  Dear  Madam.  If,  however,  the  person  addressed 
is  a  girl  known  to  be  in  or  just  past  her  teens,  it  is  better  to  use  the 
name;  as,  Dear  Miss  Blank.  In  addressing  a  married  woman.  Dear 
Mrs.  Blank  may  be  used  even  when  there  is  only  a  slight  acquaintance. 

5.  In  addressing  a  firm  or  other  group  of  women,  Ladies  is  the 
proper  salutation. 

6.  Observe  that  dear  is  capitalized  only  when  it  is  the  first  word 
of  the  salutation. 

Titles 

Courtesy,  as  well  as  custom,  requires  that  a  title  be  used 

either  before  or  after  every  name,  except  when  writing  to  a 

corporation  or  a  society.    It  is  a  mark  of  respect  that  should 

never  be  omitted,  especially  when  addressing  an  individual. 

Titles  of  courtesy. — The  titles  of  courtesy  that  are  used 
in  the  address  of  business  letters  are  Mr.,  Messrs.,  Esq., 
Miss,  Misses,  Mesdames,  Dr.,  Rev.,  Prof.,  and  Hon. 

Mr.  is  applied  to  all  men  who  have  no  other  distinctive  title;  as, 
Mr.  Paul  G.  Henderson. 

Messrs.,  the  abbreviation  of  Messieurs,  the  French  for  Gentlemen, 
is  the  correct  title  to  use  when  addressing  two  or  more  men  engaged 
in  business  under  a  name  that,  in  some  way,  implies  the  personal 
element;  as,  Messrs.  Lyons  &  Carnathan;  Messrs.  J.  C.  Matthews 
&  Co. ;  Messrs.  John  L.  Harrison  &  Sons.  It  is  also  used  in  address- 
ing two  or  more  men  not  associated  in  business ;  as,  Messrs.  Brown, 
Hamlin,  and  Jennings.  It  should  not,  however,  be  used  where  the 
word  the  may  be  placed  before  the  firm  name ;  as,  (the)  J.  C.  Matthews 
Company,  not  Messrs  J.  C.  Matthews  Company. 


TITLES  OF  OFFICIAL  POSITION  7 

Esq.,  the  abbreviation  of  Esquire,  is  a  title  given  especially  to 
lawyers  and  justices  of  the  peace,  but  it  may  be  applied  to  any  man  as 
a  mark  of  respect;   as,  Thomas  E.  Barkworth,  Esq. 

Miss  is  the  title  given  to  an  unmarried  woman.  It  is  not  an  abbre- 
viation, and  should  not,  therefore,  be  followed  by  a  period ;  as.  Miss 
Fannie  Ward.  The  plural  of  Miss  is  Misses;  as,  Misses  Mary  and 
Kate  Harrison,  or  the  Misses  Harrison. 

Mrs.,  the  abbreviation  of  Mistress,  is  the  title  applied  to  a  married 
woman;    as,  Mrs.  John  C.  Smith. 

Mesdames,  sometimes  abbreviated  Mmes.,  is  the  title  used  in 
addressing  two  or  more  married  women;  as,  Mesdames  Shaw  and 
Walker. 

Dr.  is  the  title  applied  to  those  who  hold  a  doctor's  degree  in  medi- 
cine, dentistry,  literature,  theology,  or  philosophy;  as,  Dr.  A.  B. 
Robinson. 

Rev.,  the  abbreviation  of  Reverend,  is  the  title  given  to  clergymen; 
as,  Rev.  Ames  Maywood. 

Prof.,  the  abbreviation  of  Professor,  is  the  title  given'  to  those 
who  hold  professorships  in  colleges  and  universities ;  as.  Prof.  Charles 
W.  Eliot. 

Hon.,  the  abbreviation  of  Honorable,  is  the  title  given  to  men 
who  hold  or  have  held  important  positions  in  the  national,  state, 
or  city  government;    as,  Hon.  Woodbridge  N.  Ferris. 

Titles  of  official  position. — Titles  designating  official  po- 
sition, such  as  Manager,  President,  Secretary,  Superintendent, 
etc.,  should  be  placed  on  a  line  with  the  name,  for  the  reason 
that  it  adds  to  the  degree  of  courtesy  and  also  avoids  mak- 
ing the  second  line  of  the  address  too  long.  If,  however, 
the  name  or  the  title  is  long,  the  title  may,  in  order  to 
preserve  the  balance  of  the  introductory  address,  be  placed 
on  the  second  line  or  on  a  line  by  itself.  Such  titles  should 
not  be  abbreviated  unless  space  requires  it. 
Wrong:     Mr.  W.  W.  Stephens, 

Vice-President,  Stephens-Adamson  Mfg.  Co., 
Aurora,  Illinois. 
Right:     Mr.  W.  W.  Stephens,  Vice-President, 
Stephens-Adamson  Mfg.  Co., 
Aurora,  Illinois. 

Official  titles. — In  addressing  the  President,  Vice-Presi- 
dent, Speaker  of  the  House  of  Representatives,  members 


8  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

of  the  Cabinet,  and  judges  of  the  Supreme  Court,  it  is 
customary  to  address  the  office  rather  than  the  individual ; 
thus,  To  the  President^  White  House,  Washington,  D.  C. 
Sir  or  Mr.  President  is  the  proper  salutation.  With  the 
exception  of  the  president,  some,  however,  prefer  to  address 
the  individual  rather  than  the  office ;  as.  To  the  Hon.  Robert 
M.  Lansing,  Secretary  of  State,  Washington,  D.  C. 

In  addressing  Cabinet  officers.  Senators,  Members  of 
Congress,  Governors,  Lieutenant  Governors,  judges  and 
mayors,  use  Hon.;  as,  Hon.  Charles  E.  Townsend,  United 
States  Senator,  Washington,  D.  C.  The  proper  salutation 
is  Sir.  Dear  Senator  or  My  dear  Senator  may  be  used  if 
the  writer  is  acquainted  with  the  person  addressed. 

Doubling  titles. — It  should  be  observed  that  a  title  of 
courtesy*  should  not  be  used  after  a  name  when  a  similar 
title  precedes  the  name;  th\is,  Mr.  John  Brown,  or  John 
Brown,  Esq.,  not  Mr.  John  Brown,  Esq.  It  is,  however, 
correct  to  use  a  title  of  courtesy  before  a  name  and  an 
academic  or  an  official  title  after  the  name ;  as.  Pro}.  J.  C. 
Millman,  Ph.  D.;  Mr.  C.  0.  Harmon,  Manager.  When 
addressing  a  clergyman  whose  Christian  name  or  initials 
are  unknown,  it  is  correct  to  use  the  two  titles  Rev.  and 
Mr.  or  Rev.  and  Dr.;  as,  Rev.  Mr.  Maywood;  Rev.  Dr. 
Pool. 

Exercise  2 

Write  the  following  introductory  addresses,  using  appro- 
priate titles  and  salutations.  Arrange,  capitalize,  and 
punctuate  according  to  the  models : 

1.  c.  w.  camp  (a  manufacturer)  fargo  north  dakota. 

2.  James  m  adams  (a  lawyer)  webb  block  jackson  mich. 

3.  a  c  mills  and  j  w  main  (partners  in  business)  erie  pa. 

4.  ames  maywood  (a  clergyman)  Cincinnati  ohio. 

5.  alice  m  woodson  (wife  of  J.  M.  Woodson)  wheeling  w  va. 

6.  bliss  and  sons  (merchants)  sumner  iowa. 

7.  Claude  a  swanson  (United  States  Senator)  Washington  d  c. 

8.  helen  white  (a  young  lady)  dallas  texas. 


THE  COMPLIMENTARY  CLOSE  9 

9.  c   m   fleming    (Instructor   in    Mathematics,     Technical    High 
School)  Indianapolis  ind. 
10.  John  c  smith  (doctor  of  medicine)  butte  mont. 

Exercise  3 

Write  the  following  headings  and  introductory  addresses, 
using  appropriate  titles  and  salutations.  Arrange,  capitalize, 
and  punctuate  according  to  the  models : 

1.  butte  mont  dec  15  1915  harold  m  Johnson  memphis  tenn. 

2.  university  building  Chicago  ill  oct  25  1915  c  f  holland  secretary 

chamber  of  commerce  jackson  mich. 

3.  July  15  1916  atlanta  ga  425  Washington  ave  c  m  miller  president 

miller  mfg  company  lincoln  neb. 

4.  st  Charles  minn  box  36   sept   5   1914  a  w  smith   cashier  first 

national  bank  la  crosse  wis. 

5.  Philadelphia  pa  nov  16  1915  a  w  shaw  company  Chicago  ill. 

6.  hutchinson  kans  march  23  1915  wilson  haines  &  co  denver  colo. 

7.  1243  elm  ave  Indianapolis  ind  feb  23  1916   carter   &   price  (a 

firm  composed  of  unmarried  women)  hartford  conn. 

8.  omaha  neb  may  14  1915  martin  &  jones   (a  firm  composed  of 

married  women)  huntington  w  va. 

The  Complimentary  Close 

The  complimentary  close  consists  of  those  words  of 
courtesy  or  respect  that  follow  the  body  of  the  letter  and 
precede  the  signature.  It  should  begin  about  the  middle 
of  the  page,  but  may  be  shifted  either  to  the  right  or  the  left 
so  that  the  signature,  which  usually  begins  five  spaces 
to  the  right  of  the  complimentary  close,  will  end  even  with 
the  right-hand  margin. 

In  business  correspondence  the  forms  that  have  the 
sanction  of  good  usage  are  Yours  truly,  Yours  very  truly. 
Truly  yours,  Very  truly  yours,  etc. 

When  addressing  superiors  or  high  officials,  use  Respect- 
fully,  Yours  respectfully,  Respectfully  yours.  Very  respect- 
fully, etc. 

In  social  correspondence.  Yours  sincerely.  Yours  very 
sincerely,   Cordially  yours,   Faithfully  yours,   etc.,   are   the 


10  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

appropriate  terms.  These  may  also  be  used  in  business 
correspondence  when  a  cordial  relation  exists  between  the 
writer  and  the  person  addressed. 

The  complimentary  close  should  always  be  in  harmony 
with  the  salutation.  For  instance,  if  the  salutation  is 
Dear  Sir,  My  dear  Sir,  Dear  Madam,  Dear  Miss  Blank, 
etc.,  the  appropriate  complimentary  close  is  Yours  truly. 
Yours  very  truly,  Very  truly,  or  Very  truly  yours.  If  the 
salutation  is  Dear  Friend,  My  dear  Friend,  Dear  John,  etc., 
the  appropriate  complimentary  close  is  Yours  sincerely, 
Sincerely  yours.  Cordially  yours,  etc.  If  the  salutation  is 
Sir,  the  appropriate  complimentary  close  is  Yours  respect- 
fully. Respectfully  yours.  Very  respectfully,  etc. 

Punctuation. — The  complimentary  close  is  followed  by 
a  comma.  Only  the  first  word  should  begin  with  a  capital 
letter. 

The  Signature 

The  signature  is  the  name  of  the  writer  or  of  the  firm  or 
corporation  of  which  he  is  a  part  or  a  representative.  An 
individual  signature  should  be  written  with  a  pen.  Firm 
names  are  usually  typewritten  and  followed  by  the  signature 
or  the  initials  of  the  person  responsible  for  the  letter,  to- 
gether with  such  word  or  words  as  indicate  his  official 
capacity. 

The  signature  is  written  below  the  complimentary  close, 
beginning  at  such  a  point  that  it  will  end  at  the  right- 
hand  margin. 

When  writing  to  a  stranger,  a  woman  should  always 
prefix  the  title  Miss  or  Mrs.  in  parenthesis,  so  that  a 
reply  may  be  properly  addressed ;  as,  (Miss)  Alice  Brown ; 
(Mrs.)  John  Dickinson. 

A  married  woman  generally  uses  her  husband's  name ;  as, 
(Mrs.)  Henry  M.  Stone.  If,  however,  she  prefers  to  sign 
her  own  name,  she  should  also  write  her  husband's  name 
in  parenthesis,  either  directly  under  her  signature  or  below 


THE  SIGNATURE 


11 


at  the  left;  as,  Mary  E.  Stone  (Mrs.  Henry  M.  Stone). 
A  widow  generally  uses  her  Christian  name;  as,  (Mrs.) 
Anna  M.  Hunter. 

A  woman  should  never  use  her  husband's  title.  The  wife 
of  a  doctor  or  a  minister,  for  example,  uses  the  name  of 
her  husband  without  his  title;  as,  Mrs.  C.  J.  Smith,  not 
Mrs.  Dr.  C.  J.  Smith,  nor  Mrs.  Dr.  Smith. 

The  following  models  illustrate  the  correct  forms  for  the 
complimentary  close  and  the  signature : 

Tours  very  truly. 


(3) 
Tours  very  truly, 

STANDARD  TTPEWBITER  COMPAHy, 


TTPE 


President. 


(4) 
Very  truly  yours, 

THE  AMERICAN  TRUST  COMPANY, 

(5) 
Tours  very  truly, 

THE  MILES  MANUFACTURING  COMPANY, 


Secr'etary. 


12 


BUSINESS   LETTERS:    HOW   TO   WRITE   THEM 


JACKSON    ROTARY  CLUB 

jAtnSON  ,    Michigan 


Folding 

Sizes  of  paper. — Business  stationery  comes  in  three 
sizes ;  standard,  half -sheet,  and  two-fold. 

The  standard  size,  814  x  11  inches,  is  folded  £is  follows: 

(1)  Fold  the  paper 
from  the  bottom  so 
as  to  leave  a  margin 
of  about  one  inch  at 
the  top — sufficient, 
if  possible,  to  leave 
the  firm  name  visi- 
ble ;  (2)  crease  at  the 
fold,  being  careful  to 
keep  the  side  edges 


exactly  even ;  (3)  turn  the  paper  so  that  the  folded  edge 
will  be  at  your  left ;  then  fold  from 
you  a  little  less  than  one-third  the 
width  of  the  sheet ;  (4)  fold  the  left- 
hand  edge  toward  you,  observing 
that  the  left  and  right-hand  folds 
are  of  the  same  width,  a  little  less 
than  one-third  the  width  of  the  sheet. 

Inserting. — Hold  the  envelope  in 
the  left  hand,  with  the  flap  opening 
toward  the  right ;  then  take  in  your 
right  hand  the  letter  as  it  lay  after  folding,  inserting  the 

edge  that  was  last  folded. 

The  two-fold  size,  7}4  x 
10  J^  inches,  is  folded  as 
follows:  Fold  the  bottom 
from  you  a  little  less  than 
one-third  the  length  of  the 
sheet ;  fold  the  same  width 
of  the  top  toward  you,  and 
^^  insert  the  edge  that  was 
-"""'"TTninnir     I  j^st  folded. 


THE  ENVELOPE  ADDRESS  13 

The  Envelope  Address 

The  envelope  address  consists  of  the  name  and  title,  and 
the  address  of  the  person  to  whom  the  letter  is  written, 
which  should  be  identical  with  the  introductory  address. 
In  addition,  it  should  include  the  street  address  or  the 
post-office  box  when  the  town  is  large,  the  county  when  the 
town  is  small,  and  the  rural  route  if  required. 

Position  of  the  envelope  address. — The  first  line  of  the 
envelope  address  should  be  a  little  below  the  middle  of  the 
envelope,  commencing  far  enough  to  the  left  so  that  the 
space  at  the  left  of  the  name  will  be  about  twice  the  space 
at  the  right  of  the  name.  Each  subsequent  line  of  the 
address  should  begin  from  one-half  to  one  inch  to  the  right 
of  the  preceding  line. 

When  addressing  envelopes  with  a  pen,  the  name  and 
title  should  be  written  on  the  first  line,  the  name  of  the  city 
on  the  second,  and  the  name  of  the  state  on  the  third. 
When  addressing  on  the  typewriter,  the  name  of  the  city 
and  state  are  generally  written  on  the  same  line,  in  which 
case  some  prefer  to  put  the  street  address  on  the  second 
line  and  the  city  and  state  on  the  third  line. 

The  street  address,  the  county,  the  box  number,  the  name 
of  the  person  in  whose  care  the  letter  is  sent,  the  words 
General  Delivery,  Transientj  or  any  other  special  directions 
belong  to  the  lower  left-hand  corner  of  the  envelope. 

The  parts  of  the  envelope  address  are  sometimes  arranged 
as  shown  in  Illustration  No.  4.  This  form  saves  a  little 
time,  but  it  should  be  used  only  when  the  block  style  is 
used  in  the  letter. 

Punctuation. — ^A  comma  should  be  placed  after  each  line 
of  the  envelope  address,  except  the  last,  which  is  followed 
by  a  period.  When  the  city  and  state  are  written  on  the 
same  line,  they  should  be  separated  by  a  comma.  If  a 
title  follows  the  name,  it  should  be  separated  from  the 
name  by  a  comma. 


14  BUSINESS   LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

ILLUSTRATION    1 


llr. 

John 

W,  Craddock, 

President, 

Cr 

addock-Terry, 

Company, 

• 

Lynchburg, 

Va. 

Personal, 

ILLUSTRATION 


Miss    Catherine    Spencer, 

334   Woodward   Avenue, 

Detroit,    Michigan. 


c/o   Mrs.   A.   C.   Brown, 


Note. — Some  prefer  to  omit  the  punctuation  at  the  end  of  the 
lines,  except  periods  after  abbreviations.  This  should  be  done,  how- 
ever, only  when  the  punctuation  marks  are  omitted  after  each  line 
of  the  heading  and  of  the  introductory  address. 


THE  ENVELOPE  ADDRESS  15 

ILLUSTRATION   3 


Messrs.  George  C.  Woolson  &   Co 
Buffalo-  N.  Y, 


120-122  W.  32d  St. 


ILLUSTRATION    4 


Mr.  S.  C.  Parry,  President, 
Parry  Manufacturing  Company, 
Indianapolis,  Indiana. 


Notes 

1.  Do  not  use  the  sign  #  or  No.  before  the  street  address  or  the 
post-office  box. 

2.  When  the  name  of  the  street  is  a  number,  and  the  house  number 
immediately  precedes  -it,  the  number  of  the  street  should  be  spelled 
out;   as,  126  Fourth  Street,  not  126  J^th  Street. 


16  BUSINESS   LETTERS:    HOW   TO   WRITE   THEM 

3.  Capitalize  street,  avenue,  square,  park,  boulevard,  etc.,  and  spell 
out  in  full  when  they  occupy  the  second  line  of  the  address,  unless  the 
length  of  the  line  requires  that  they  be  abbreviated. 

4.  In  the  well-balanced  address,  the  second  line  should  end 
approximately  five  spaces  to  the  left  or  to  the  right  of  the  end  of  the 
first  line.  To  accomplish  this,  it  is  sometimes  necessary  to  spell  out 
the  name  of  the  state,  while  in  other  cases,  it  is  necessary  to  abbreviate 
it.  Avoid,  if  possible,  having  the  second  line  end  even  with  the  first 
line. 

5.  When  addressing  envelopes  with  a  pen,  the  abbreviations  of 
the  names  of  the  states  should  be  written  with  care.  It  is  better  to 
spell  the  name  of  the  state  in  full,  unless  it  is  long,  such  as  Massachu- 
setts, Pennsylvania,  etc. 

Exercise  4 

Write  the  following  addresses  on  pieces  of  paper  the  size 
of  the  ordinary  business  envelope,  using  appropriate  titles. 
Arrange  and  punctuate  according  to  the  models : 

1.  John  J.  Hill  Sumner  Iowa. 

2.  James  A.  Tawney  (ex-Congressman)  Winona  Minn. 

3.  F.  J.  Simpson  (lawyer)  146  5th  Ave.  Chattanooga  Tenn. 

4.  Robb  &  Robb  272-282  Southern  Building  Washington  D.  C. 

5.  National  Envelope  Company  Cincinnati  Ohio. 

6.  O.  H.  Blackman  care  of  Blackman-Ross  Company  10  E.  33d 

Street  New  York  City  N.  Y. 

7.  S.  C.  Parry  President  Parry  Manufacturing  Co.  Indianapolis 

Indiana. 

8.  Elliott-Fisher  Company  13  Cedar  Street  Harrisburg  Pennsyl- 

vania 

9.  Frank  W.  Judson    Secretary    Midland    Glass  and   Paint  Co. 

Eleventh  and  Howard  Streets  Omaha  Nebraska. 

10.  George  W.  Carlton  Box  621  Cleveland  Ohio 

11.  Elizabeth  Gushing   (unmarried)   Vassar  College  Poughkeepsie 

N.  Y 

12.  Alice  and  Kate  Anderson  (unmarried)  Surrey  County  Dobson 

North  Carolina. 

13.  Peter  H.  Henderson  Transient  Hutchinson  Kansas. 

14.  George  Gray  Williams  Bangor  Maine  General  Delivery. 

15.  Joseph    E.    Harvey    Manager    Harvey    Adjustment    Bureau 

Pocatello  Idaho. 

16.  Montgomery  Ward  &  Co.  Chicago  111. 


UNITY  OF  THE  SENTENCE  17 


COMPOSITION  OF  THE  LETTER 

Mastery  of  the  principles  of  the  form  and  arrangement 
of  the  business  letter  is  a  very  simple  matter — so  simple 
that  there  is  no  reason  why  any  one  should  be  deficient 
in  this  phase  of  the  subject.  But  the  composition  of  the 
business  letter  requires  both  study  and  practice.  The 
successful  letter  writer  must  not  only  possess  a  thorough 
knowledge  of  grammar,  punctuation,  and  capitalization, 
but  he  must  also  know  words  and  how  to  use  them  to  make 
the  reader  take  his  view  of  the  matter. 

The  language  used  should  be  as  nearly  conversational  as 
possible.  Simple  words  should  be  used  where  such  words 
will  express  the  meaning,  and  as  a  general  rule,  short  sen- 
tences are  to  be  preferred  to  long  ones.  Of  course  the 
sentences  will  and  should  vary  in  length.  Too  many  short 
sentences  give  an  abruptness  that  is  unpleasant;  long, 
involved  sentences  are  more  difficult  for  the  reader  to 
comprehend,  and,  generally,  less  convincing.  They  are  not 
objectionable,  however,  when  they  are  logically  built  up, 
but  they  are  likely  to  lack  the  quality  of  unity. 

Unity  of  the  Sentence 

Unity  requires  that  a  sentence  should  contain  but  one 
central  idea. 

1.  Two  or  more  statements  not  closely  and  logically 
related  with  one  another  should  not  be  combined  in  one 
sentence.  . 

Original:  This  bank  closes  at  4  p.  m.,  and  pays  4%  interest  on 
deposits. 

Improved:  This  bank  closes  at  4  p.  m.  It  pays  4%  interest  on 
deposits. 

2.  Avoid  long  compound  sentences  consisting  of  several 
statements  connected  with  ands,  huts,  etc. 


18  BUSINESS   LETTERS:    HOW   TO   WRITE   THEM 

Original:  Nearly  two  weeks  ago  we  sent  you  an  order  for  goods, 
but  we  have  received  no  reply,  and  as  we  are  in  urgent  need  of  these 
goods,  we  should  like  to  hear  from  you  at  once,  and  in  the  future, 
when  we  send  you  orders,  please  acknowledge  them  promptly  and  save 
us  much  annoyance. 

Improved :  Nearly  two  weeks  ago  we  sent  you  an  order  for  goods, 
but  we  have  received  no  reply.  As  we  are  in  urgent  need  of  these 
goods,  we  should  like  to  hear  from  you  at  once.  In  the  future,  when 
we  send  you  orders,  please  acknowledge  them  promptly. 

3.  Unite  in  one  sentence  phrased,  clauses,  and  sentences 
that  are  closely  and  logically  related  with  one  another  in 
thought. 

Wrong:  It  offers  a  course  for  those  who  wish  to  study  painting. 
At  the  same  time  affording  an  opportunity  for  literary  study. 

Right:  It  offers  a  course  for  those  who  wish  to  study  painting, 
at  the  same  time  affording  an  opportunity  for  literary  study.     Or, 

It  offers  a  course  to  those  who  wish  to  study  painting,  and  at  the 
same  time  affords  an  opportunity  for  literary  study. 

Wrong :  We  are  sending  you  our  art  catalogue.  On  the  last  page 
of  which  you  will  find  the  price  of  our  regular  10-inch  machine  quoted 
at  $100. 

Right :  We  are  sending  you  our  art  catalogue,  on  the  last  page  of 
which  you  will  find  the  price  of  our  regular  10-inch  machine  quoted 
at  $100. 

Wrong:  Your  claim  has  not  been  approved  by  our  auditing  com- 
mittee.   There  being  further  information  necessary. 

Right:  Your  claim  has  not  been  approved  by  our  auditing  com- 
mittee, there  being  further  information  necessary. 

4.  Do  not  join  one  thought  to  a  preceding  thought  by 
and,  hut  or  or  unless  the  two  thoughts  are  of  equal  value. 
In  other  words,  put  subordinate  thoughts  into  subordinate 
grammatical  forms. 

Original:  This  is  a  difficult  piece  of  work,  and  it  is  necessary  to 
be  careful. 

Improved :  As  this  is  a  difficult  piece  of  work,  it  is  necessary  to  be 
careful. 

Original:  She  did  not  wish  to  displease  so  good  a  customer,  so 
she  accepted  the  goods  returned. 

Improved :  As  she  did  not  wish  to  displease  so  good  a  customer, 
she  accepted  the  goods  returned.    Or, 


UNITY  OF  THE  SENTENCE  19 

Not  wishing  to  displease  so  good  a  customer,  she  accepted  the  goods 
returned. 

5.  Do  not  join  a  relative  clause  to  a  principal  clause  by 
and  or  hut. 

Wrong:  We  have  assigned  the  territory  to  our  Mr.  Stillson.  a 
native  of  that  state,  and  who  is  familiar  with  the  conditions  there. 

Right :  We  have  assigned  the  territory  to  our  Mr.  Stillson,  a  native 
of  that  state,  who  is  familiar  with  the  conditions  there.     Or, 

We  have  assigned  the  territory  to  our  Mr.  Stillson,  who  is  a  native 
of  that  state,  and  who  is  familiar  with  the  conditions  there. 

Note. — And  before  the  relative  clause  in  the  last  sentence  is  cor- 
rect, for  the  reason  that  it  connects  the  two  relative  clauses. 

6.  Avoid  using  clauses  in  an  overlapping  construction ; 
that  is,  with  the  second  depending  on  the  first,  the  third 
on  the  second,  etc. 

Original :  You  will  remember  they  returned  your  check  when  you 
took  off  the  2%,  which  was  paid  about  sixty  days  from  date,  which 
was  in  violation  of  the  terms  of  sale. 

Improved :  You  will  remember  they  returned  your  check  when 
you  took  off  the  2%  in  violation  of  the  terms  of  sale. 

Exercise  5    . 

Correct  the  following  sentences,  and  give  your  reason  for 
each  correction : 

1.  We  are  in  receipt  of  your  order  of  the  25th,  and  it  is  much 
appreciated,  and  we  thank  you  for  it. 

2.  As  you  requested,  I  am  sending  the  work  of  as  many  students 
as  possible,  and  you  will  find  some  of  the  work  very  good  while  some 
is  very  poor. 

3.  About  a  year  ago  we  arranged  for  a  firm  in  San  Francisco  to 
act  as  our  agents,  and  to  whom  we  shipped  a  quantity  of  your  books. 

4.  We  hope  that  you  will  give  us  an  opportunity  of  serving  you 
again.  In  which  case  we  are  certain  the  order  will  be  filled  in  a  manner 
that  will  meet  with  your  approval. 

5.  We  can  not  account  for  this  mistake,  and  we  are  always  care- 
ful about  such  matters. 

6.  This  machine  is  becoming  very  popular,  and  it  is  simple  in 
construction,  durable,  and  easy  to  operate. 


20  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

7.  An  old-line  life  insurance  company  does  business  on  a  so-called 
legal  reserve  basis.  Its  rates  of  premium  being  computed  according 
to  an  established  and  accepted  mortality  table. 

8.  We  thank  you  for  your  co-operation,  as  we  certainly  do  need  a 
lot  of  applicants  at  this  time,  as  we  have  so  many  more  calls  than  we 
are  able  to  fill. 

9.  I  believe  that  the  candidates  nominated  by  the  board  and 
who  are  not  now  trustees  of  the  company  will  strengthen  the  institution. 

10.  We  have  a  heavy  payment  to  provide  for  on  the  15th  instant, 
and  would  like  to  have  the  benefit  of  your  remittance  to  apply  against 
it  and  hope  that  it  will  be  possible  for  you  to  accommodate  us  at 
this  time. 

Clearness 

Clearness  treats  of  the  proper  use  and  arrangement  of 
words,  phrases,  and  clauses.  It  is  the  first  requisite  of 
every  sentence.  A  sentence  may  be  grammatically  correct, 
yet  its  elements  may  be  so  placed  that  the  meaning  can 
not  be  definitely  determined,  or  the  meaning  conveyed  may 
be  entirely  different  from  that  intended.  For  example,  the 
sentence,  "I  met  your  brother  going  to  town  yesterday," 
leaves  one  in  doubt  as  to  who  was  going  to  town.  But 
when  written,  "On  my  way  to  town  yesterday,  I  met  your 
brother,"  or  "I  met  your  brother  on  his  way  to  town,"  the 
meaning  is  perfectly  clear. 

Position  of  adverbs  and  adjectives. — Place  adverbs  and 
adjectives  where  they  will  modify  the  word  intended 

Original:     I  should  like  to  see  you  very  much. 

Improved:     I  should  like  very  much  to  see  you. 

Original:  We  have  a  fine  line  of  elegant  children's  suits  at  low 
prices. 

Improved:  We  have  a  fine  line  of  children's  elegant  suits  at  low 
prices. 

Caution 

The  word  only  requires  special  care,  for  the  reason  that 
no  other  word  in  the  English  language  is  so  often  mis- 
placed. As  a  general  rule  only  should  be  placed  immediately 
before  the  word,  phrase,  or  clause  that  it  modifies. 


CLEARNESS  21 

Thus,  in  the  sentence,  "I  only  saw  your  brother  for  a  moment," 
only  modifies  saw,  and  conveys  the  idea  that  I  saw  him,  but  did  not 
speak  to  him,  while  evidently  the  meaning  intended  is  that  I  saw 
your  brother  only  for  a  moment,  no  longer. 

When  no  ambiguity  would  arise  (as  at  the  end  of  sentences),  only 
may  be  placed  after  the  word  it  modifies;  as,  "He  spoke  to  me  only.'* 

Position  of  phrases  and  clauses. — Phrases  and  clauses, 
like  words,  should  be  so  placed  that  they  will  convey  the 
meaning  intended. 

f  Original:  He  said  that  he  visited  one  creamery  that  was  manu- 
facturing a  great  deal  of  ice  cream,  in  order  to  learn  something  about 
the  business. 

Improved:  He  said  that  in  order  to  learn  something  about  the 
business,  he  visited  one  creamery  that  was  manufacturing  a  great 
deal  of  ice  cream. 

1.  Place  the  participle  as  near  as  possible  to  the  word 
it  modifies. 

Original :  I  looked  through  a  window,  and  saw  a  man,  on  my  way 
home,  reading  a  book. 

Improved:  On  my  way  home,  I  looked  through  a  window  and 
saw  a  man  reading  a  book. 

2.  Place  the  relative  pronoun  as  near  as  possible  to  its 
antecedent. . 

Original:     The  fruit  came  in  a  small  wooden  box,  which  we  ate. 

Improved:     The  fruit,  which  we  ate,  came  in  a  small  wooden  box. 

When  the  meaning  would  not  be  obscure,  the  relative  clause  may, 
for  smoothness,  be  placed  at  some  distance  from  its  antecedent; 
as,  "He  jests  at  scars,  who  never  felt  a  wound." 

3.  When  a  subordinate  clause  is  introduced  by  if, 
when,  as,  while,  though,  although,  etc.,  force  is  often  gained 
by  placing  it  before  the  principal  clause.  This  is  especially 
true  in  long  sentences. 

Original:  I  should  be  delighted  to  introduce  you  to  my  friends, 
and  to  show  you  the  objects  of  interest  in  our  city  and  the  beautiful 
scenery  in  the  neighborhood,  if  you  were  here. 

Improved:  //  you  were  here,  I  should  be  delighted  to  introduce 
you  to  my  friends,  and  to  show  you  the  objects  of  interest  in  our 
city  and  the  beautiful  scenery  in  the  neighborhood. 


22  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

4.  In  conditional  sentences,  the  subordinate  clauses 
should  be  kept  distinct  from  the  principal  clauses. 

Original:  The  expectations  of  the  parents  are  disappointed  if 
the  children  do  not  work  hard,  and  money  is  wasted. 

Improved:  //  the  children  do  not  work  hard,  the  expectations  of 
the  parents  are  disappointed,  and  money  is  wasted. 

Position  of  correlative  conjunctions. — Place  correlatives 
before  the  same  parts  of  speech. 

Original:  He  not  only  gave  me  good  advice,  hut  he  helped  me 
financially. 

Improved:  He  not  only  gave  me  good  advice,  btit  helped  me 
financially. 

Original :     He  shall  either  leave  or  I  will. 

Improved :     Either  he  shall  leave  or  I  will. 

Antecedent  of  the  Personal  Pronoun. — Make  the  ante- 
cedent of  personal  pronouns  clear. 

Original:     The  boy  assured  his  father  that  he  was  right. 

Improved :     The  boy  said  to  his  father,  "You  are  right." 

Or,  The  boy  said  to  his  father,  "I  am  right." 

Original:  This  law  will  be  tolerated  by  the  new  party  only  so 
long  as  it  is  perfectly  harmless. 

Improved :  This  law  will  be  tolerated  by  the  new  party  only  so 
long  as  the  law  is  perfectly  harmless. 

In  sentences  of  this  kind,  when  the  antecedent  can  not  be  repeated, 
report  the  conversation  in  the  form  of  a  direct  quotation. 

Repetition  of  important  elements. — While  prepositions, 
conjunctions,  etc.,  may  often  be  omitted,  they  should  be 
repeated  in  the  following  constructions. 

1.  The  preposition  should  be  repeated  when  its  objects 
are  separated  by  an  intervening  phrase,  or  by  a  verb  and 
its  object. 

Original:  He  forgets  the  gratitude  that  he  owes  to  those  that 
helped  him  when  he  was  poor  and  uninfluential,  and  John  Smith 
in   particular. 

Improved:  He  forgets  the  gratitude  that  he  owes  to  those  that 
helped  him  when  he  was  poor  and  uninfluential,  and  to  John  Smith 
in  particular. 

The  first  sentence  might  be  construed  to  mean  that  he  forgets 
the  gratitude  that  he  owes  to  those  that  helped  him  and  helped  John 


CLEARNESS  23 

Smith.  The  second  sentence  means  that  he  forgets  the  gratitude 
he  owes  to  those  that  helped  him  and  the  gratitude  he  owes  to  John 
Smith  in  particular. 

2.  When  two  words  connected  by  a  conjunction  are 
such  as  to  require  different  prepositions  after  them,  both 
prepositions  should  be  expressed. 

Original :     I  had  no  confidence  or  respect  for  him. 
Improved :     I  had  no  confidence  in  or  respect  for  him. 

3.  When  two  or  more  infinitives  are  used  in  the  same 
construction,  the  sign  to  should  be  repeated  when  they  are 
separated  by  a  number  of  intervening  words. 

Original:  It  would  have  been  no  surprise  to  hear  the  bark  of  a 
raccoon,  or  see  the  eyes  of  a  wildcat  gleaming  through  the  leaves. 

Improved:  It  would  have  been  no  surprise  to  hear  the  bark  of 
a  raccoon,  or  to  see  the  eyes  of  a  wildcat  gleaming  through  the  leaves. 

4.  Repeat  the  article  when  the  reference  is  to  more 
than  one  person  or  thing,  if  the  meaning  would  not  other- 
wise be  clear. 

.  Original :     The  secretary  and  treasurer  shall  be  elected  for  a  period 
of  three  years. 

Improved:  The  secretary  and  the  treasurer  shall  be  elected  for 
a  period  of  three  years. 

The  first  sentence  implies  that  one  person  shall  be  both  secretary 
and  treasurer,  while  the  second  sentence  implies  that  there  are  two 
persons,  one  secretary  and  the  other  treasurer. 

\, 

5.  When  that,  who,  when,  where,  if,  etc.,  introduce  a 

series  of  clauses,  repeat  the  connective  before  each  member 
of  the  series. 

Original :  He  said  that  he  would  be  here  soon,  and  he  would  then 
take  the  matter  up  with  us  more  in  detail. 

Improved :  He  said  that  he  would  be  here  soon,  and  that  he  would 
then  take  the  matter  up  with  us  more  in  detail. 

Original:  We  have  assigned  the  territory  to  our  Mr.  Stillson, 
who  is  a  native  of  that  state  himself,  is  familiar  with  the  conditions 
there,  and  will  remain  there  for  sometime  to  come. 

Improved:  We  have  assigned  the  territory  to  our  Mr.  Stillson, 
who  is  a  native  of  that  state  himself,  who  is  familiar  with  the  con- 
ditions there,  and  who  will  remain  there  for  some  time  to  come. 


24  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

6.  Repeat  the  common  subject  of  several  verbs  when 
any  word  comes  between  that  is  capable  of  being  a  subject. 

Original :  I  shall  be  disappointed  if  he  does  not  fulfill  his  engage- 
ments with  me,  and  will  endeavor  to  make  other  arrangements. 

Improved :  I  shall  be  disappointed  if  he  does  not  fulfill  his  engage- 
ments with  me,  and  /  shall  endeavor  to  make  other  arrangements. 

7.  Do  not  omit  a  principal  or  an  auxiliary  verb  in  one 
clause  unless  the  form  understood  is  the  same  as  the  form 
expressed  in  the  other. 

Original :     I  shall  feel,  as  I  always  have,  that  he  is  in  the  wrong. 
Improved :     I  shall  feel,  as  I  have  always  felt,  that  he  is  in  the 
wrong. 

Original:     The  flowers  were  in  bloom,  and  the  grass  green. 
Improved:     The  flowers  were  in  bloom,  and  the  grass  was  green. 

8.  Repeat  any  form  of  the  verb  to  he  when  it  is  used 
as  a  principal  verb  in  one  clause  and  as  an  auxiliary  in 
another. 

Original :  She  was  the  cynosure  of  all  eyes,  and  admired  by  every 
one  present. 

Improved:  She  was  the  cynosure  of  all  eyes,  and- w;as  admired 
by  every  one  present. 

Miscellaneous  principles.— Express  clearly  the  subject  of 
a  participle. 

Original:  Standing  on  the  seashore,  two  vessels  are  seen  moving 
in  opposite  directions. 

Improved:  Standing  on  the  seashore,  /  saw  two  vessels  moving 
in  opposite  directions. 

2.  When  the  subject  consists  of  a  series  of  words, 
phrases,  or  clauses,  force  is  gained  by  using  some  summa- 
rizing word,  such  as  thesCy  all,  etc. 

Original:  Cotton  and  gold,  banks  and  railways,  crowded  ports 
and  populous  cities  are  not  the  elements  that  constitute  a  great  nation. 

Improved:  Cotton  and  gold,  banks  and  railways,  crowded  ports 
and  populous  cities — these  are  not  the  elements  that  constitute  a 
great  nation. 

3.  In  making  a  comparison  in  the  comparative  degree, 
the  person  or  thing  compared,  should  always  be  excluded 


CLEARNESS  25 

from  the  class  to  which  it  belongs,  by  the  use  of  other  or 
some  similar  expression. 

Original:     He  is  taller  than  any  member  of  his  class. 

Improved:     He  is  taller  than  any  other  member  of  his  class. 

4.  In  making  comparisons  in  the  superlative  degree, 
the  word  other  should  not  be  used,  because  it  would  exclude 
the  person  or  thing  compared. 

Original:  This  paper  has  the  largest  circulation  of  all  the  other 
papers  in  the  city. 

Improved:  This  paper  has  the  largest  circulation  of  all  the  papers 
in  the  city. 

5.  Avoid  the  use  of  superfluous  words. 

Original :     I  do  not  like  it,  but  I  know  of  no  other  alternative. 
Improved:     I  do  not  like  it,  but  I  know  of  no  alternative. 

6.  Avoid  the  use  of  inappropriate  words. 
Original:     We  had  an  awfully  nice  time. 
Improved:     We  had  a  very  nice  time. 

Exercise  6 

Correct  the  errors  in  the  following  sentences  in  accordance 
with  the  rules  given  under  the  corresponding  headings: 

Position  of  Adverbs  and  Adjectives 

1.  I  only  saw  him  once  after  that. 

2.  I  never  expect  to  see  him  again. 

3.  He  is  an  unquestioned  man  of  genius. 

4.  He  only  ofifered  me  fifty  dollars  for  it. 

5.  His  store  is  only  open  in  the  forenoon. 

6.  The  French  nearly  lost  five  thousand  men. 

7.  We  only  distribute  them  among  our  friends. 

8.  I  scarcely  ever  remember  seeing  one  that  \  like  better. 

9.  The  crown  of  England  can  only  be  worn  by  a  Protestant. 

10.  The  Indians  chiefly  subsist  by  hunting  and  fishing. 

11.  We  scarcely  have  enough  to  supply  our  own  immediate  needs. 

12.  He  had  almost  gotten  to  the  top  when  the  rope  broke. 

13.  He  stopped  asking  questions  abruptly  and  left  the  room. 

14.  He  answered  all  the  questions  that  were  put  to  him  quite 
readily. 


26  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

15.  You  can  depend  on  his  doing  whatever  he  undertakes  to  do 
well. 

16.  It  is  a  prevalent  notion  that  a  man's  character  mainly  is  deter- 
mined by  his  environment.  It  would  be  nearer  true  to  directly  turn 
this  statement   around. 

17.  The  manufacture  of  sugar  is  only  profitable  when  conducted 
on  a  large  scale. 

18.  He  adds  the  amounts  of  all  checks  received  during  the  day 
on  an  adding  machine. 

Position  of  Phrases  and  Clauses 

1.  The  earth  looks  as  if  it  were  flat  on  the  map. 

2.  He  might  be  taken  by  any  one  who  met  him  as  a  robber. 

3.  He  went  to  town  driving  a  flock  of  sheep,  on  horseback. 

4.  The  Britons  at  least  fought  as  bravely  as  the  Romans. 

5.  The  meaning  is  unmistakable  of  his  presence  here. 

6.  Wanted — Twenty  boys  to  weed   onions,   from  ten  to  fifteen 
years    old. 

7.  He  received  a  reward  and  the  praise  of  all  for  his  bravery. 

8.  He  bought  the  house  in  which  he  lives,  for  his  own  residence. 

9.  He  could  see  the  ship  gliding  under  full  sail  through  a  spy- 
glass. 

10.  Wanted — A  stenographer  by  a  legal  firm,  who  can  also  do 
collecting. 

11.  Nature  tells  me  I  am  the  image  of  God,  as  well  as  the  Scriptures. 

12.  Teachers  should  try  to  repress  the  practice  of  throwing  stones 
as  far  as  possible. 

13.  Please  tell  my  father,  if  he  is  at  home,  I  shall  not  hurry  back. 

14.  Everybody  thought  that  this  was  destined  to  be  a  great  city 
twenty  years  ago. 

15.  She  went  on  the  stage,  for  which  she  had  a  strong  inclination, 
to  gain  a  living. 

16.  When  the  cat  came  into  the  room,  feeling  tired,  I  laid  aside 
my  work  and  began  to  talk  to  her. 

17.  You  can  tell  what  will  be  the  level,  whether  higher  or  lower, 
of  his  future  course,  by  the  direction  in  which  he  is  headed. 

18.  Did  you  take  the  book  to  the  library,  that  I  lent  you? 

19.  I  called  at  the  man's  home  who  visited  us  sometime  ago. 

20.  He  is  like  a  beast  of  prey,  who  is  devoid  of  compassion. 


CLEARNESS  27 

21.  He  needs  no  spectacles,  that  can  not  see;   nor  boots,  that  can 
not  walk. 

22.  Life  with  him  has  ended  in  a  sad  mistake,  which  began  with 
such  bright  prospects. 

23.  This  way  will  take  you  to  a  gentleman's  house  that  hath  skill 
to  take  off  these  burdens. 

Position  of  Correlatives 

1.  I  will  neither  give  you  money  nor  favors. 

2.  We  must  not  only  think  of  ourselves,  but  also  of  others. 

3.  I  am  neither  acquainted  with  the  writer  nor  his  works. 

4.  She  not  only  speaks  English,  but  also  French  and  German. 

5.  You  can  neither  hope  for  success  in  this  course  nor  in  the 
other. 

6.  California  not  only  produces  gold  in  abundance,  but  quick- 
silver also. 

7.  It  will  not  merely  interest  children,  but  grown-up  people  too. 

8.  This  is  not  merely  intended  to  interest  people,  but  to  instruct 
them. 

9.  The  good  man  not  only  deserves  the  respect,  but  also  the  love 
of  his  fellow  beings. 

10.  They  not  only  drew  from  their  experience  of  actual  govern- 
ment, but  from  their  wealth  of  knowledge  of  past  history. 

Antecedent  of  the  Personal  Pronoun 

1.  The  boy  promised  his  father  that  he  would  pay  his  debts. 

2.  If  fresh  milk  does  not  agree  with  the  child,  boil  it. 

3.  The  farmer  told  his  neighbor  that  his  cattle  were  in  his  corn. 

4.  The  lad  can  not  leave  his  father,  for  if  he  should,  he  would 
die. 

5.  He  at  last  found  the  key,  locked  the  door,  and  went  away, 
putting  it  in  his  pocket. 

6.  He  told  his  friend  that  if  he  did  not  feel  better  in  half  an  hour, 
he  would  return. 

Repetition  of  Important  Elements 

1.  He  tried  the  old  and  new  method. 

2.  I  never  have,  nor  never  will  agree  to  such  a  proposal. 

3.  He  may  be  successful  in  politics,  as  he  has  in  business. 


28  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

4.  We  have  a  large  and  small  dictionary  for  the  use  of  students. 

5.  He  never  has,  and  probably  never  will  forgive  me  for  deceiving 
him. 

6.  Our  editorial  page  will — as  it  always  has — support  any  worthy 
cause. 

7.  The  council  has  not  now,  nor  never  had  the  power  to  make 
such  a  law. 

8.  The  question  has  not,  and  probably  never  will  be  satisfactorily 
settled. 

9.  He  belongs  to  one  caste,  and  the  hewers  of  wood  and  drawers 
of  water  to  another. 

10.  It  is  one  of  the  greatest  misfortunes  that  have,  or  can  ever 
happen  to  any  one. 

11.  He  ridicules  the  notion  that  truth  will  prevail;    it  never  has, 
and  never  will  prevail. 

12.  He  strongly  insisted  that  the  measure  was  unjust,  and  was 
opposed  to  the  organization  of  labor. 

13.  The  old  man  said  he  was  destitute  of  the  means  of  subsistence, 
and  had  no  money  with  which  to  purchase  any. 

14.  I  will  pardon  him  if  he  apologizes  and  will  make  reparation 
for  the  damage  he  has  done. 

15.  I  was  naturally  grateful  to  the  man  who  had  once  befriended 
me,  and  was  well  disposed  toward  the  whole  party. 

16.  It  is  no  use  trying  to  make  him  see  what  he  owes  to  Robert 
and  the  friends  who  preserved  him  in  peril. 

17.  Both  in  the  country  and  the  city,  at  his  home  and  business, 
you  will  find  him  the  same  genuine  friend. 

18.  He  said  that  he  would  be  able  to  see  us  when  he  returns  to 
the  city,  and  go  over  the  matter  more  fully. 

19.  We  hope  that  you  have  decided  to  go  ahead  with  the  work, 
and  we  may  have  the  pleasure  of  hearing  from  you  by  return  mail. 

Review  Exercise 

1.  i  only  recite  once  a  day. 

2.  I  can  not  hardly  endure  it. 

3.  Repeat  the  word  over  again. 

4.  That  word  is  wrong;   erase  it  out. 

5.  All  the  sentences  are  not  correct. 

6.  I  should  like  to  go  with  you  very  much. 

7.  He  had  not  scarcely  a  moment  to  spare. 


CLEARNESS  29 

8.  Iron  is  more  useful  than  all  the  metals. 

9.  Detroit  is  larger  than  any  city  in  Michigan. 

10.  He  seems  clearly  to  understand  his  business. 

11.  Detroit  is  the  largest  of  any  city  in  Michigan. 

12.  The  children  seemed  to  be  dressed  nearly  alike. 

13.  There  is  no  man  who  would  be  more  welcome. 

14.  This  picture  is  an  exact  facsimile  of  the  other. 

15.  It  is  a  good  plan  to  adopt  with  new  beginners. 

16.  He  seems  to  have  more  faith  in  us  than  his  friends. 

17.  This  seemed  to  be  the  universal  opinion  of  all  men. 

18.  I  was  not  aware  that  you  had  been  ill  until  yesterday. 

19.  We  do  the  largest  business  of  any  other  firm  in  the  city. 

20.  Please  report  any  inattention  of  the  waiters  to  the  cashier. 

21.  The  child  was  a  poor  little  orphan  boy  without  any  parents. 

22.  We  never  have  and  never  will  be  forced  into  such  a  measure. 

23.  The  performance  will  take  place  at  2  p.  m.  Saturday  afternoon. 

24.  I  saw  my  friend  when  I  was  in  Chicago  walking  down  State 
Street. 

25.  They  soon  had  an  entire  monopoly  of  the  whole  trade  of  the 
country. 

26.  The  horses  being  tired,  they  held  a  council  and  decided  to 
go  no  farther. 

27.  In  one  evening  I  counted  a  large  number  of  meteors  sitting  on 
my  piazza. 

28.  As  they  were  about  to  leave,  they  began  to  collect  their  things 
together. 

29.  He  said  that  he  had  heard  nothing,  and  did  not  expect  to 
before  next  week. 

30.  He  told  his  friend  that  if  he  did  not  feel  better  in  half  an 
hour  he  thought  that  he  had  better  go  home. 

31.  The  moon  cast  a  pale  light  on  the  graves  that  were  scattered 
around,  which  appeared  above  the  horizon. 

32.  We  import  our  coffee  through  our  agents  in  New  York,  which 
is  roasted  and  ground  on  the  premises  daily. 

33.  The  carriage  stopped  at  a  small  gate  which  led  by  a  short 
gravel  walk  to  the  house  amidst  the  nods  and  smiles  of  the  whole 
party. 

34.  I  merely  intend  this  as  a  suggestion. 


30  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

Effectiveness 

Parallelism. — Parallelism  requires  that  two  or  more 
similar  ideas  be  expressed  in  a  similar  way ;  that  is,  if  one 
idea  is  expressed  with  an  infinitive,  the  other  should  be; 
if  one  is  a  participial  phrase,  the  other  should  be ;  if  one  is 
a  relative  clause,  the  other  should  be,  etc.  Parallelism  is  a 
great  aid  to  effectiveness. 

Original:    The  students  began  clapping  their  hands  and  to  shout. 

Improved :  The  students  began  clapping  their  hands'  and  shout- 
ing.    Or, 

The  students  began  to  clap  their  hands  and  to  shout. 

Original :  Pupils  who  have  partly  completed  their  course  else- 
where and  having  satisfactory  evidence  of  the  fact  will  be  put  in  the 
advanced  classes. 

Improved:  Pupils  who  have  partly  completed  their  course  else- 
where and  who  have  satisfactory  evidence  of  the  fact  will  be  put  in 
the  advanced  classes.     Or, 

Pupils  having  partly  completed  their  course  elsewhere  and  having 
satisfactory  evidence  of  the  fact  will  be  put  in  the  advanced  classes. 

Repetition  for  emphasis. — Do  not  hesitate  to  repeat  a 
word  or  phrase  if  the  repetition  is  necessary  to  secure  clear- 
ness or  emphasis.  In  fact,  one  of  the  most  effective  means 
of  securing  emphasis  is  by  the  repetition  of  a  word  at  the 
beginning  of  each  of  a  series  of  phrases  or  clauses  arranged 
in  cumulative  order. 

Emphatic:  Our  next  thought  was  that  perhaps  in  that  pile  of 
discarded  mail,  the  man  behind  the  desk  is  missing  something  of  value, 
something  which  would  help  him  in  his  business,  something  which 
would,  if  he  availed  himself  of  it,  enable  him  to  turn  out  better  goods 
at  the  same  cost. 

Emphatic:  With  my  emergency  automobiles,  with  my  expert 
repair  men,  with  my  modern  garage  and  supply  rooms,  I  can  give  you 
quick  service,  and  what  is  more  important — good  work. 

Repetitions  to  be  avoided. — Such  repetitions  as  the  fol- 
lowing should  be  carefully  avoided : 

1.  Avoid  the  unnecessary  repetition  of  the  same  word  or 
phrase  within  a  short  space. 


EFFECTIVENESS  -  31 

Original:  We  should  like  to  accommodate  you,  hut  we  have  but 
one  rule  in  such  cases. 

Improved :  We  should  like  to  accommodate  you,  but  we  have  only 
one  rule  in  such  cases. 

2.  Avoid  the  repetition  of  a  succession  of  similar  sounds. 
Poor:     We  hope  the  note  we  wrote  you  a  few  days  ago  has  been 

received. 

Improved:  We  trust  that  you  have  received  the  letter  we  wrote 
you  a  few  days  ago. 

3.  Avoid  the  repetition  of  hut,  and,  as,  for,  since,  etc., 
with  noticeable  frequency. 

Original :  I  am  sure  that  I  made  a  pretty  good  grade  on  all  my 
examinations,  and  I  have  studied  for  sometime  past,  and  I  am  resting 
now. 

Improved :  I  am  sure  that  I  made  a  pretty  good  grade  on  all  my 
examinations,  and  as  I  have  studied  for  sometime  past,  I  am  resting  now. 

4.  Avoid  the  careless  repetition  of  that  in  a  complex 
noun  clause  used  as  the  object  of  a  verb. 

Original:  He  said  that  if  we  would  agree  to  the  concession  that 
he  would  be  able  to  carry  the  plan  through. 

Improved:  He  said  that  if  we  would  agree  to  the  concession,  he 
would  be  able  to  carry  the  plan  through. 

5.  Avoid  the  too  frequent  use  of  the  same  word  or  con- 
struction at  the  beginning  of  sentences  or  paragraphs. 

Original :  I  hasten  to  express  my  pleasure  in  receiving  your  interest- 
ing letter.  I  thank  you  heartily  for  your  kind  recommendations, 
which  have  no  doubt  materially  increased  our  sales.  /  congratulate 
you  upon  the  good  circulation  of  your  magazine,  and  I  hope  your 
attractive  number  will  overreach  your  expectations. 

/  shall  give  myself  the  pleasure  of  considering  your  proposition 
at  an  early  date. 

/  thank  you  for  the  courtesies  you  have  extended. 

Improved:  I  hasten  to  express  my  pleasure  in  receiving  your 
interesting  letter  and  to  thank  you  heartily  for  your  kind  recom- 
mendations, which  have  no  doubt  materially  increased  our  sales. 

Allow  me  to  congratulate  you  upon  the  good  circulation  of  your 
magazine  and  to  express  the  hope  that  your  attractive  number  will 
overreach  your  expectations. 

Your  proposition  will  receive  my  earnest  consideration  just  as 
soon  as  I  can  get  a  little  time  to  give  to  it. 


32         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

I  thank  you  for  the  courtesies  you  have  extended. 

Brevity. — While  brevity  is  one  of  the  essentials  of  a 
business  letter,  it  is  to  be  secured,  not  by  omitting  subjects, 
articles,  auxiliary  verbs  and  prepositions,  but  by  leaving 
out  all  unnecessary  matter  and  by  stating  concisely  and  to 
the  point  what  one  has  to  say.  The  following  cautions 
should  be  observed : 

1.  Do  not  omit  the  subject  of  a  sentence  when  it  is  in 
the  first  person. 

Poor:    Have  received  your  order  of  November  15. 

Better:    We  have  received  your  order  of  November  15. 

Note. — When  the  members  of  a  compound  sentence  are  short 
and  closely  connected,  the  subject  of  the  second  member  may  be 
omitted  when  it  is  the  same  as  the  subject  of  the  first  member;  as, 
"We  have  received  your  order  of  November  15  and  will  give  it  prompt 
attention." 

2.  Do  not  omit  the  articles  a,  an,  and  the. 

Poor :    I  was  not  aware  of  terms  on  which  goods  were  sold. 
Better:     I  was  not  aware  of  the  terms  on  which  the  goods  were 
sold. 

3.  As  a  rule,  do  not  omit  prepositions. 
Original :     Your  note  falls  due  May  10. 
Improved :     Your  note  falls  due  on  May  10. 

The  conversational  style. — One  of  the  best  means  of 
increasing  the  effectiveness  of  a  business  letter  is  to  give 
it  the  conversational  style — the  personal  touch.  To  acquire 
an  easy,  natural,  conversational  style,  imagine  your  cor- 
respondent across  the  desk  from  you  and  talk  to  him  on 
paper,  as  far  as  possible,  just  as  you  would  in  a  personal 
interview.  The  judicious  use  of  such  contractions  as  Fll, 
we've,  well,  you'd,  etc.,  help  to  give  a  letter  the  personal 
touch.  In  the  sales  letter,  such  contractions  may  be  used 
with  good  effect,  and  sometimes  in  the  collection  letter  or 
the  letter  answering  a  complaint;  but  in  letters  of  appli- 
cation, introduction,  and  recommendation,  they  would  be 
out  of  place. 


EFFECTIVENESS  33 

Tone  and  individuality. — Too  many  business  letters  are 
devoid  of  tone  and  individuality.  They  follow  the  stilted, 
stereotyped  style  of  twenty  years  ago.  Instead  of  being 
natural,  they  are  filled  with  such  meaningless,  tiresome, 
overworked  expressions  as  contents  noted,  esteemed  favor, 
beg  to  advise,  etc.  The  business  letter  to  be  effective  must  be 
vigorous,  original,  clear,  and  convincing.  The  following 
list  contains  some  of  the  most  objectionable  stock  words 
and  phrases  so  often  found  in  business  letters : 

Advise. — Overworked  and  stilted.  It  should  be  confined 
to  the  actual  giving  of  advice.    Use  inform,  tell,  or  say. 

As  per. — Of  legal  origin,  stilted,  and  overworked.  Say 
according  to  or  in  accordance  with. 

At  hand  or  to  hand. — Say,  "We  have  just  received  your 
request  for  a  copy  of  our  catalogue,"  not  "Your  request 
for  a  copy  of  our  catalogue  is  at  hand.*' 

Beg. — In  the  phrases  heg  to  acknowledge,  heg  to  state,  beg 
to  say,  etc. 5  beg  is  a  relic  of  early,  formal  courtesy,  no  longer 
used  by  good  letter  writers. 

Contents  carefully  noted. — Originally  intended  to  show 
courtesy,  but  overworked  and  meaningless. 

Esteemed. — Meaningless  and  obsolete  in  such  expressions 
as  your  esteemed  letter. 

Favor. — Incorrectly  used  in  the  place  of  letter.  Say: 
"We  have  your  letter  .of  August  5,"  not  "We  have  your 
favor  of  August  5." 

Hand  you. — Not  to  be  used  in  the  place  of  send  you. 

Herewith. — Superfluous  when  used  with  enclose.  When 
used  in  this  connection,  herewith  means  in  this  envelope, 
an  idea  already  contained  in  the  word  enclose. 

Inst.,  ult.,  and  prox. — Abbreviations  of  instant,  ultimo, 
and  proximo,  meaning  the  present,  the  past,  and  the  next 
month.     It  is  generally  better  to  designate  the  month  by 


34         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

its  name ;  as,  "We  have  your  letter  of  June  5,"  not  "Your 
letter  of  the  6th  instant," 

Kind. — See  esteemed. 

Oblige. — A  weak,  meaningless  close  to  a  letter. 

Per. — ^A  word  of  Latin  origin,  and  should  be  used  only 
with  other  words  of  Latin  form;  as,  per  diem,  per  annum. 
Use  a  with  week,  day,  month,  year,  etc. 

Same. — Incorrectly  used  as  a  personal  pronoun.  Say, 
"We  regret  the  error  and  hope  it  has  not  caused  you  any 
inconvenience,"  not  "We  regret  the  error  and  hope  same 
has  not  caused  you  any  inconvenience."  Same  is  correctly 
used  when  a  noun  is  understood  after  it ;  as,  "These  prices 
are  the  same  (prices)  as  we  quoted  you  last  week." 

Stated. — Stilted  and  overworked.  Inform,  say,  or  tell  is 
usually  better. 

Valued. — See  esteemed. 

Would  say,  wish  to  say,  etc. — ^Wordy  and  generally  use- 
less. Say,  "We  regret  that  we  can  not  comply  with  your 
request,"  not  "In  reply  to  your  letter  would  say  that  we 
regret,"  etc. 

Writer. — Undesirable  as  a  substitute  for  I,  for  the  reason 
that  it  is  awkward  and  fixes  attention  on  the  writer  even 
more  than  the  use  of  /.  Say,  "In  reply  to  your  letter  of 
June  5,  I  have  gone  carefully  over  the  matter,"  not  "In 
reply  to  your  letter  of  June  5,  the  writer  has  gone  carefully 
over  the  matter." 

How  to  Begin  a  Letter 

The  most  emphatic  places  in  a  letter,  just  as  in  a  sentence 
or  a  paragraph,  are  the  beginning  and  the  end.  It  is,  there- 
fore, important  that  the  student  should  study  carefully 
how  to  begin  and  close  a  business  letter  in  the  most  effective 
way.    In  many  letters,  especially  in  sales  letters  and  letters 


HOW  TO  BEGIN  A  LETTER  35 

answering  complaints,  the  opening  paragraph  may  be 
utilized  to  put  the  reader  in  the  right  mental  attitude  to 
receive  the  message  that  follows. 

While  it  is  usually  desirable  to  make,  in  the  first  sentence, 
some  reference  to  the  letter  that  is  being  answered,  by 
referring  to  its  contents  or  its  date,  it  is  much  better  to  make 
this  reference  incidentally.  Thus,  "We  thank  you  for  the 
suggestion  contained  in  your  letter  of  June  25;"  "We 
regret  to  learn  that  our  last  shipment  was  not  satisfactory, 
as  you  say  in  your  letter  of  the  15th,  which  has  just  reached 
us;"  "The  goods  ordered  in  your  letter  of  September  12 
will  be  shipped  the  first  of  next  week." 

Avoid  such  weak,  stereotyped  opening  phrases  as,  "We 
beg  to  acknowledge  receipt  of  your  valued  favor  of  recent 
date;"  "Replying  to  your  esteemed  favor  of  the  15th 
instant ;"   "In  reply  to  your  favor  of  the  20th  ultimo." 

The  following  paragraphs  illustrate  both  the  weak,  over- 
worked openings  and  the  easy,  natural  way  of  beginning 
a  letter : 

Poor:  Your  valued  order  of  the  10th  instant  is  at  hand,  and  are 
giving  same  our  prompt  attention. 

Improved :  Thank  you  for  your  order  of  June  10.  We  shall  give 
this  our  prompt  attention  and  hope  to  please  you  in  every  respect. 

Original:  In  reply  to  your  esteemed  favor  of  the  25th  instant, 
beg  to  advise  that"  both  of  your  orders  have  already  been  shipped. 

Improved :  We  take  pleasure  in  informing  you,  in  reply  to  your 
letter  of  March  25,  that  both  of  your  orders  have  been  shipped. 

Original:  We  beg  to  acknowledge  receipt  of  your  favor  of  the 
6th  instant,  with  order  for  50  bags  of  peanuts,  for  which  accept  thanks. 

Improved :  We  are  just  in  receipt  of  your  order  of  June  6  for  50 
bags  of  peanuts,  for  which  please  ac'cept  our  thanks.    Or, 

Please  accept  our  thanks  for  your  order  of  June  6  for  50  bags  of 
peanuts. 

Original :  We  are  in  receipt  of  your  favor  of  the  7th  inst.  relative 
to  loss  on  property  #412  Harwood  Street,  and  beg  to  advise  that  we 
have  given  orders  to  have  a  carpenter  make  the  repairs  and  forward 
bill  to  us. 

Improved :    We  are  pleased  to  inform  you  that  we  have  given  orders 


36  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

to  have  a  carpenter  make  the  repairs  on  the  property  at  412  Harwood 
Street  and  forward  the  bill  to  us,  as  requested  in  your  letter  of  the 
7th. 

Original:  We  have  carefully  noted  contents  of  your  esteemed 
favor  of  recent  date,  and  in  reply  thereto,  would  state  that  the  brushes 
we  shipped  you  were  the  large  size,  and  our  very  best  price  for  }/2 
doz.  would  be  50c  each. 

Improved :  The  brushes  to  which  you  refer  in  your  letter  of  Novem- 
ber 10  were  the  large  size,  and  our  very  best  price  for  one-half  dozen 
of  these  would  be  50c  each.     Or, 

We  have  carefully  noted  the  contents  of  your  letter  of  November 
10.  The  brushes  to  which  you  refer  were  the  large  size,  and  our  very 
best  price  for  one-half  dozen  of  these  would  be  50c  each. 

Original:  We  beg  to  acknowledge  receipt  of  your  recent  favor 
in  which  you  advise  that  the  second  coat  which  we  sent  you  was  also 
too  small. 

Improved:  We  regret  very  much  to  learn,  from  your  letter  of 
November  19,  that  the  second  coat  we  sent  you  was  also  too  small. 

Original:  In  reply  to  your  esteemed  favor  of  recent  date,  we 
would  state  that  the  matter  is  having  our  careful  attention. 

Improved:  The  matter  to  which  you  refer  in  your  letter  of  the 
20th  is  having  our  careful  attention. 

Original :  Your  esteemed  favor  of  the  18th  inst.  to  hand  and  con- 
tents noted. 

Improved :  It  is  a  pleasure  to  me  to  acknowledge  personally  your 
letter  regarding  our  1916  model  and  to  note  the  information  you 
furnish  regarding  your  car. 

How  to  Close  a  Business  Letter 

Since  the  closing  paragraph  occupies  so  important  a  place, 
it  should  be  so  constructed  as  to  add  to  the  effectiveness  of 
the  letter.  A  good  closing  paragraph  gives  the  letter  a 
finished  touch.  It  should  be  a' natural  conclusion,  character- 
istic of  every-day  life,  and  consistent  with  the  preceding 
parts  of  the  letter.  A  closing  that  is  used  without  any 
sense  of  its  appropriateness  will  weaken  the  very  best  of 
letters.  The  participial  constructions  beginning  with 
hoping,  thanking,  trusting,  assuring,  etc.,  are  inherently 
weak,  often  meaningless,  and  are  used  so  much  that  they 


HOW  TO  CLOSE  A  LETTER  37 

weaken  rather  than  strengthen  the  letter.  Often  a  letter 
can  be  so  constructed  as  to  need  no  separate  closing  para- 
graph, but  when  such  a  paragraph  is  desirable  to  prevent 
abruptness,  it  is  usually  better  to  make  a  direct  statement 
than  to  use  the  participial  phrase;  as,  "We  thank  you 
for  your  order,"  rather  than  "Thanking  you  for  your  order, 
we  are,"  etc. 

A  careful  study  of  the  following  closing  paragraphs  will 
enable  the  student  not  only  to  avoid  many  of  the  cut-and- 
dried  expressions  that  lessen  the  effectiveness  of  so  many 
business  letters,  but  to  close  his  letters  in  a  natural,  effective 
way: 

Weak :    Hoping  to  hear  from  you  soon,  we  are,  etc. 
Improved:     We  would  thank  you  to  write  us  by  Wednesday,  the 
25th. 

Weak:  Trusting  that  we  may  have  the  pleasure  of  sending  you 
some  samples,  we  are,  etc. 

Improved :    We  suggest  that  you  let  us  send  you  some  samples. 

Original:  Thanking  you  for  the  order,  and  trusting  that  we  may 
hear  from  you  again  in  the  near  future,  we  are,  etc. 

Improved :  We  thank  you  for  your  order  and  trust  that  we  may  be 
able  to  serve  you  again  in  the  near  future. 

Weak:  Thanking  you  for  your  inquiry  and  assuring  you  of  our 
desire  to  serve  you,  we  are,  etc. 

Improved :  We  thank  you  for  your  inquiry  and  assure  you  of  our 
earnest  desire  to  serve  you. 

Weak :  Trusting  that  it  will  be  convenient  for  you  to  make  remit- 
tance at  an  early  date,  we  are,  etc. 

Improved:  Won't  you  please  make  us  a  remittance  by  Tuesday, 
the  15th. 

Weak :  Hoping  that  we  may  have  the  opportunity  of  serving  you 
again,  and  assuring  you  that  the  order  will  be  filled  satisfactorily,  we 
are,  etc. 

Improved :  We  hope  that  you  will  give  us  an  opportunity  to  serve 
you  again,  in  which  case  we  are  certain  the  order  will  be  filled  in  a 
manner  that  will  merit  your  entire  approval. 

Original:  Thanking  you  for  the  order,  and  hoping  the  goods  will 
reach  you  in  good  season  and  open  up  satisfactory,  we  remain,  etc. 


38  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

Improved :  We  thank  you  for  your  order  and  hope  the  goods  will 
reach  you  promptly  and  please  you  in  every  way. 

Weak :  Trusting  to  be  favored  with  your  early  order  and  assuring 
you  that  it  will  have  our  prompt  and  careful  attention,  we  are,  etc. 

Improved :  We  promise  our  very  best  attention  to  any  order  that 
you  may  send  us. 

Weak :  Trusting  that  we  may  have  your  order,  we  beg  to  remain, 
etc. 

Improved :   We  shall  appreciate  your  order. 

Original:  Thanking  you  in  advance  for  a  reply  and  hoping  to  be 
favored  with  an  order  from  you  in  the  near  future,  we  are,  etc. 

Improved :  We  shall  appreciate  the  kindness  of  a  reply,  and  the 
pleasure  of  being  of  service  to  you. 

Compound  Words 

As  a  rule,  words  used  in  their  regular  grammatical  rela- 
tion and  construction  should  be  written  separately,  but 
when  they  are  used  together  to  express  a  specific  meaning, 
they  should  be  joined  with  a  hyphen  or  written  solid. 

Take,  for  example,  iron  fence,  iron-saw,  and  ironwood. 
An  iron  fence  is  a  fence  made  of  iron,  which  is  clearly  ex- 
pressed when  written  as  two  words.  Iron-saw,  a  saw  made 
to  cut  iron,  if  not  connected  with  the  hyphen,  would  convey 
the  wrong  idea — that  it  is  a  saw  made  of  iron.  Ironwood, 
a  kind  of  hard  wood,  clearly  conveys  the  meaning  when 
written  solid.  In  general,  it  may  be  said  that  no  expression 
in  the  language  should  ever  be  changed  from  two  or  more 
words  into  one — either  hyphenated  or  solid — without  a 
change  of  sense. 

Many  compound  words,  once  written  with  the  hyphen, 
through  long  usage,  have  come  to  be  written  as  one  word. 
While  there  is  a  lack  of  uniformity  in  the  manner  of  writing 
compound  words,  the  following  rules  reflect  the  general 
usage: 

1.  Vice  and  ex  used  as  parts  of  titles  are  connected  with 
the  other  part  of  the  title  by  a  hyphen. 

ex-President  Roosevelt  Vice-President  Marshall 


COMPOUND  WORDS  39 

2.  When  a  noun  and  a  participle  are  used  as  an  adjective 
modifier,  they  should  be  connected  by  a  hyphen. 

money-making  plans  order-producing  ideas 

labor-saving  machines  good-looking  lines 

3.  The  prefixes  co  and  re  should  be  followed  by  the 
hyphen  when  compounded  with  words  beginning  with 
0  or  e. 

co-ordinate    co-operate       re-elect  re-enter  re-enforce 

4.  The  prefixes  self  and  all  are  followed  by  the  hyphen, 
self-confidence       self-control         all-important      all-seeing 

5.  Compound  numerals  should  be  written  with  the 
hyphen. 

twenty-one  thirty-five  seventy-eight     ninety-seven 

6.  When  fractions  are  expressed  in  words,  a  hyphen 
should  connect  the  two  parts. 

one-half  two-thirds  three-fourths      seven-eighths 

7.  When  a  numeral  is  compounded  with  another  word 
to  form  an  adjective  modifier,  the  parts  should  be  connected 
with  the  hyphen. 

forty-foot  lot  two-foot  rule  30-day  note 

six-story  building       four-legged  animal  56-inch  tread 

8.  When  above,  ill,  well,  and  so  are  used  with  a  participle 
to  form  an  adjective  modifier,  they  are  joined  to  the  parti- 
ciple by  a  hyphen. 

above-mentioned         ill-bred  well-informed  so-called 

Note. — When  these  words  are  used  merely  to  modify  a  participle 
in  the  predicate,  the  hyphen  is  not  required ;  as,  "He  is  well  informed.'' 

9.  The  words  half  and  quarter  when  prefixed  to  other 
words  are  generally  followed  by  the  hyphen. 

half-dollar        half-hearted         quarter-pound         half-witted 

10.  First-class,  second-class,  first-rate,  second-rate,  etc., 
when  used  as  adjectives,  require  the  hyphen. 

11.  Certain  combinations  of  words  are  sometimes  used 


40 


BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 


as  adjectives,  and  when  so  used,  they  should  be  hyphenated, 
made-to-order  garments    out-of-the-way  place        ready-made  suits 
end-of-the-year  rush  I-told-you-so  expression   well-to-do  man 

Note. — Today,  tomorrow,  and  tonight  may  be  written  either  with 
the  hyphen  or  solid.  In  business  correspondence  the  tendency  is  to 
omit  the  hyphen. 

The  following  words  are  written  with  the  hyphen : 
above-mentioned      good-will,  noun 
bird's-eye,  adj.  hard-hearted 

brand-new  high-class,  adj. 

high-grade,  adj. 

ill-bred 

ill-natured 

labor-saving 

left-hand,  adj. 

make-up,  noun 

old-fashioned 

out-of-door,  adj. 


post-office,  adj. 
right-hand,  adj. 
rock-bottom,  adj. 
so-called 
short-lived 
stepping-stone 
well-known,  adj. 
well-informed,  adj. 
wide-awake,  adj. 
whole-hearted 
whole-souled 


by-laws 
by-product 
card-index 
car-load,  adj. 
cross-examine 
cross-question 
every-day,  adj. 
first-class,  adj. 

12.  Compounds  with  the  prefixes  over,  under,  ajter,  non, 
fore,  semi,  sub,  counter,  and  out  are  written  solid. 

overdue  nonpayment  subagent 

overcharge  nonresident  subcommittee 

underestimate  foretell  countercharge 

undercharge  foresight  counterbalance 

afternoon  semiannually  outstanding 

afterthought  semimonthly  outside 

13.  Compounds  ending  with  house,  room,  shop,  hook, 
ship,  side,  maker,  mill,  work,  holder,  keeper,  man,  and  woman 
are  generally  written  solid. 


warehouse 

outside 

policyholder 

schoolhouse 

inside 

bookkeeper 

bedroom 

shoemaker 

timekeeper 

workroom 

sawmill 

salesman 

workshop 

windmill 

workman 

textbook 

framework 

workingman 

salesmanship 

millwork 

saleswoman 

workmanship 

stockholder 

needlewoman 

Each  of  the  following  expressions  should  be  written  as 
one  word : 


COMPOUND  WORDS 


41 


almost 

already,  adv. 

although 

altogether 

always,  adv. 

anybody 

anyhow 

anything 

anyway 

anywhere 

apiece  (each) 

awhile,  adv. 

bookkeeper 

bookkeeping 

businesslike 

blueprint,  or 

blue  print 

background 

cannot,  or 

can  not 

courthouse 

duebill 

elsewhere 

everybody 

everything 

everywhere 

bimonthly 

biweekly 

facsimile 

forever 

forthcoming 

forthwith 

fortnight 

furthermore 

headquarters 

henceforth 


hereafter 

hereby 

herein 

hereinafter 

hereinbefore 

heretofore 

hereunto 

herewith 

inasmuch 

insomuch 

intact 

itself 

letterhead 

maybe,  adv. 

meantime 

meanwhile 

moreover 

nevertheless 

newspaper 

northeast 

northwest 

northeastern 

northwestern 

notwithstanding 

nowadays 

nowhere 

oneself,  or 

one's  self 

otherwise 

policyholder 

postmaster 

postpaid 

postscript 

railroad 

railway 

safeguard 


salesman 

salesroom 

secondhand 

semiannual 

shortcomings 

shorthand 

shortsighted 

somebody 

somehow 

something 

sometime,  adv. 

sometimes,  adv. 

somewhat 

somewhere 

southeast 

southwest 

southeastern 

southwestern 

standpoint 

stockholder 

straightforward 

subdivision 

subagent 

subcommittee 

sublet 

taxpayer 

textbook 

thereafter 

thereat 

thereby 

therefor 

therefore 

therein 

thereinafter 

thereinbefore 

thereof 


thereon 

thereupon 

thereunder 

threefold 

throughout 

timekeeper 

timesaver 

together 

twofold 

upbuilding 

uphold 

upkeep,  noun 

vouchsafed 

warehouse 

wastebasket 

wastepaper 

waybill 

whatever 

whereabouts 

whereas 

whereby 

wherever 

wherein 

whereof 

whereupon 

wherewithal- 

whichever 

wholesale 

widespread 

withal 

withdraw 

withhold 

within 

without 

withstand 

workmanship 


The  following  expressions 
words : 

all  right  every  one 

any  one  may  be,  verb 

a  while,  noun  no  one 

ball  bearing  parcel  post 

en  route  pay  roll 


should  be  written  as  separate 

per  cent  some  one 

postal  card  some  time,  noun 

post  office,  noun  vice  versa 
price  list  car  load,  noun 

real  estate  any  other 


42         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Syllabication 

In  order  to  preserve  a  uniform  right-hand  margin,  it  is 
often  necessary  to  divide  a  word  at  the  end  of  a  line.  The 
division  must  always  be  made  between  syllables,  never 
elsewhere.  The  following  rules,  while  not  exhaustive,  will 
materially  assist  the  student  in  determining  where  the 
division  should  be  made : 

1.  Do  not  divide  a  word  of  one  syllable. 
Wrong:     thr-ough        stren-gth         brou-ght        sle-ight 

2.  When  two  or  more  letters  together  represent  one 
sound,  they  must  not  be  divided. 

Wrong:     telep-hone         arit-hmetic         mec-hanic        toi-ling 
Right:      tele-phone         arith-metic         me-chanic        toil-ing 

3.  Do  not  separate  a  syllable  of  one  letter  from  the  rest 
of  the  word. 

Wrong:     a-lone         man-y         e-nough         bus-y         u-nite 
Right:       alone  many  enough  busy  unite 

4.  When,  in  forming  derivatives,  a  consonant  is  doubled, 
the  division  should  usually  be  made  between  the  double 
letters. 

Wrong:     permitt-ed         shipp-ing         remitt-ance         blott-er 
Right:      permit-ted         ship-ping         remit-tance         blot-ter 

5.  Do  not  separate  ed  from  the  rest  of  the  word  unless 
it  is  pronounced  as  a  separate  syllable. 

Wrong:     ship-ped       refer-red      loan-ed      laugh-ed  hop-ed 

Right:      shipped        referred       loaned       laughed  hoped 

Right:      rat-ed  profit-ed      remit-ted  commend-ed  present-ed 

6.  Usually  a  prefix  or  a  suffix  may  be  separated  from  the 
rest  of  the  word. 

Right:      ante-cedent       il-legible       annual-ly       fiU-ing       sing-er 

7.  Divided  so  as  to  preserve  as  syllables  tion,  sion,  dan, 
dent,  tient,  dal,  tial,  tious,  dous,  gious,  geous,  and  gicn. 

Wrong:     nat-ion     permiss-ion     optic-ian     effic-ient      ofRc-ial 
Right:      na-tion     permis-sion     opti-cian     effi-cient     offi-cial 


USE  OF  ABBREVIATIONS 


43 


Exercise  7 


Divide  the  following  words 
dictionary  when  in  doubt : 


into  syllables.     Consult  a 


national 

natural 

beautiful 

special 

conscience 

schedule 

notify 

patiently 

question 

telling 

customary 

especially 

vicious 

anxious 

formality 

operate 

efficient 

leisure 

excelling 

visited 

pressure 

complexion 

brilliant 

transient 

departure 

overrated 

installing 

substantial 

English 

construction 

musician 

consistent 

adding 

instructor 

measure 

attendant 

procedure 

father 

compelled 

peculiar 

pleasure 

mother 

longer 

fulfilling 

religious 

business 

valuable 

correspondence 

Use  of  Abbreviations 

Use  abbreviations  sparingly,  especially  in  the  body  of 
the  letter.  They  detract  from  the  appearance  of  the  letter  ; 
they  save  only  a  fraction  of  a  second  on  the  part  of  the 
writer,  while  on  the  part  of  the  reader,  whose  interests  are 
all-important,  they  require  more  time,  as  the  eye  more 
readily  grasps  a  word  written  in  full  than  when  abbreviated. 
When,  in  doubt  as  to  whether  to  abbreviate  or  not,  write 
the  word  in  full. 

The  following  rules  reflect  the  best  usage  in  regard  to 
abbreviations : 

1.  An  abbreviation  should  always  be  followed  by  a  period. 

2.  Abbreviations  of  proper  nouns,  titles,  etc.,  always  begin  with 
capital  letters.  Abbreviations  of  many  other  words  and  phrases 
begin  with  capital  letters,  even  though  such  words  and  phrases  do 
not  begin  with  capital  letters  when  written  in  full.  The  capitalization 
of  abbreviations  is  entirely  a  matter  of  usage.  For  instance,  free  on 
hoard  is  usually  written  with  small  letters ;  thus,  /.  o.  6.,  while  collect 
on  delivery  is  always  written  with  capital  letters;    thus,  C.  O.  D. 

3.  Do  not  abbreviate  the  names  of  the  days  of  the  week  or  the 
names  of  the  months  in  the  body  of  a  letter;  as,  *'I  will  be  at  home 
on  Monday,  January  5,"  not  "I  will  be  at  home  on  Mon.,  Jan.  5." 

Note. — Observe  that  when  the  month  precedes  the  day  of  the 


44  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

month,  d,  st,  or  th  is  not  used ;  thus,  March  5,  not  March  5th.  But 
when  the  name  of  the  month  does  not  precede  the  day  of  the  month, 
d,  St,  or  th  is  required.  Thus,  "The  goods  will  be  shipped  by  the  5th 
of  May,"  "Your  note  falls  due  on  the  10th  instant." 

4.  Do  not  abbreviate  the  name  of  a  state  unless  it  is  used  as  a 
liart  of  an  address ;  as,  "He  lives  in  Virginia,"  not  "He  lives  in  Va." 

5.  Do  not,  as  a  rule,  abbreviate  titles  designating  official  positions ; 
as,  "Prof.  E.  M.  Coulter,  President,''  not  "Prof.  E.  M.  Coulter,  Pres." 
The  reasons  for  this  are  that  you  do  the  person  addressed  greater 
courtesy  by  writing  the  title  out  in  full  and  that  the  page  presents  a 
better  appearance.  Titles  following  the  signature  may  be  abbreviated 
when  space  requires  it. 

6.  Do  not  use  R.  R.  for  railroad,  Ry.  for  railway,  nor  Co.  for  company 
unless  these  words  are  a  part  of  a  proper  name ;  Thus,  "The  railroad 
company  is  at  fault,"  not  "The  R.  R.  Co.  is  at  fault."  "The  company 
is  willing  to  arbitrate  the  matter,"  not  "The  Co.  is  willing  to  arbitrate 
the  matter." 

7.  Use  the  abbreviation  No.  or  the  sign  #  before  figures;  as.  No.  5 
or  #5,  not  number  5.  But  do  not  use  the  abbreviation  No.  in  such 
expressions  as  "a  number  of  people." 

8.  While  usage  varies  in  writing  the  past  tense  and  the  present 
participle  and  the  plural  forms  of  0.  K.,  the  following  have  the  sanction 
of  good  authority:  O.  K'd  or  O.  K.d;  O.  K'ing  or  O.  K.ing;  0.  K's 
or  O.  K.*8. 

Note. — While,  as  a  rule,  abbreviations  should  not  be  used  in  the 
body  of  the  letter,  the  following  have  the  sanction  of  good  usage : 
a.  m.,  p.  m.,  i.  e.,  viz.,  etc.,f.  o.  b.,  and  C.  O.  D.  Instant,  ultimo,  proximo, 
while  often  abbreviated,  are  better  spelled  out  in  the  body  of  the 
letter. 

Abbreviations  of  the  Names  of  the  Months 

January Jan.      September Sept. 

February Feb.      October Oct. 

March Mar.      November Nov. 

April Apr.      December Dec. 

August Aug. 

May,  June  and  July  should  not  be  abbreviated. 

Abbreviations  of  the  Names  of  the  States 

The  United  States  Official  Postal  Guide  gives  the  following 
abbreviations  of  the  names  of  the  states,  territories,  and 


ABBREVIATIONS 


45 


possessions  of  the  United  States.  The  postal  authorities 
recommend  that  these  abbreviations  be  used  in  addressing 
all  letters  and  packages  intended  for  transmission  through 
the  mails. 

Nevada Nev. 

New  Hampshire N.  H. 

New  Jersey N.  J. 

New  Mexico N.  Mex. 

New  York N.  Y. 

North  Carolina N.  C. 

North  Dakota N.  Dak. 

Oklahoma Okla. 

Oregon Oreg. 

Pennsylvania Pa. 

Philippine  Islands P.  I. 

Porto  Rico ..P.  R. 

Rhode  Island. R.  I. 

South  Carolina S.  C. 

South  Dakota '. S.  Dak. 

Tennessee Tenn. 

Texas Tex. 

Vermont Vt. 

Virginia Va. 

Washington Wash. 

West  Virginia W.  Va. 

Wisconsin Wis. 

Wyoming Wyo. 


Alabama Ala. 

Arizona Ariz. 

Arkansas , Ark. 

California Cal. 

Colorado Colo. 

Connecticut Conn. 

Delaware : .  Del. 

District  of  Columbia D.  C. 

Florida Fla. 

Georgia . Ga. 

Illinois 111. 

Indiana Ind. 

Kansas Kans. 

Kentucky Ky. 

Louisiana La. 

Maine Me. 

Maryland Md. 

Massachusetts , Mass. 

Michigan Mich. 

Minnesota Minn. 

Mississippi Miss. 

Missouri Mo. 

Montana Mont. 

Nebraska Nebr. 

Alaska,  Idaho,  Iowa,  Ohio,  and  Utah  should  not  be  abbreviated. 
It  is  generally  better  not  to  abbreviate  Maine  and  Oregon. 


Abbreviations  of  Commercial  Terms 


Al  =  first-class 

acct.  or  a/c  =  account  ' 

ad.  or  adv.  =  advertisement 

Agt.  =  agent 

amt.  =  amount 

a.  m.  or  A.  M.  =ante  meridian 

Assn.  or  Assoc.  =  association 

Assist,  or  Asst.  =  assistant 

Atty.  =  attorney 


Ave.  or  Av.  =  Avenue 
bal.  =  balance 
bbl.  or  brl.  =  barrel  . 
bdl.=  bundle 
bg.  =bag 
bkt.  =  basket 
B/L=bill  of  lading 
Bs/L=  bills  of  lading 
Bldg.  =  building 


46 


BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


bot.  =  bought 

Boul.  or  Blvd.  =  Boulevard 

Bro.  =  brother 

Bros.  =  brothers 

brot.  =  brought 

bu.  =  bushel 

bu.  or  bus.  =  bushels 

bx.  =  box 

c,  or  ct.  =  cent,  cents 

C.=  hundred  , 

c/o  =  care 

C.  O.  D.  =cash  (or  collect)  on 
delivery 

Cor.  Sec.  =  Corresponding  Secre- 
tary 

C.  P.  A.  =  Certified  Public  Ac- 
countant 

Cr.  =  credit,  creditor 

cwt.  =  hundredweight 

Dept.  =  department 

doz.  =  dozen 

Dr.  =  debit,  debtor 

ea.  =  each 

et  al.  =  et  alii  (and  others) 

etc.  or  &c.  =  et  cetera  (and  so 
forth) 

Exch.  =  exchange 

f.  o.  b.  =free  on  board 

ford.  =  forward 

ft.  =  foot,  feet 

gal.  =  gallon 

G.  F.  A.  =  General  Freight  Agent 

G.  P.  A.  =  General  Passenger 
Agent 

gro.  or  gr.  =  gross 

hf.  orhlf.=half 

hhd.  =  hogshead 

h.  p.  =  horsepower 

hr.  =  hour 

i.  e.  =id  est  (that  is) 

in.  =inch 

inst.  =  instant  (this  month) 

int.  =  interest 


mv.  =  mvoice 

invt.  =  inventory 

Jr.  or  jr.  =  junior 

kg.  =  keg 

lb.  =  pound 

Ltd.  =  limited 

M.=  thousand 

mdse.  =  merchandise 

mem.  or  memo.  =  memorandum 

Mfg.  =  manufacturing 

Mgr.  =  Manager 

mo.  =  month 

N.  B.  =nota  bene  (note  well) 

No.  or  no.  =  number 

O.  K.  =all  correct 

oz.  =  ounce 

oz.  or  ozs.  =  ounces 

payt.  =  payment 

pc.  =  piece 

pk.  =peck 

pkg.  =  package 

p.  m.  or  P.  M.  =post  meridian 

P.  0.=  post  office 

pr.  =  pair 

Pres.  =  President 

Prin.  =  Principal 

prox.  =  proximo  (next  month) 

P.  S.  =  postscript 

pt.  =pint 

qr.  =  quire 

qt.  =  quart 

reed.  =  received 

Rec.  Sec.  =  Recording  Secretary 

r.  p.  m.  =  revolutions  per  minute 

R.  R.  =  railroad 

Ry.  =  railway 

Sec.  =  Secretary 

S"r.  or  sr.  =  senior 

Supt.  =  Superintendent  • 

St.  =  Street 

Treas.  =  Treasurer 

ult.=  ultimo  (last  month) 

Vice-Pres.  =  Vice-President 


USE  OF  FIGURES  47 

viz.  =  videlicit  (namely,  to  wit)  wk.  =  week 

vs.  or  V.  =  versus  (against)  yd.  =  yard 

W/B  or  W.  B.  =  waybill  yr.  =year 

W/Bs.=  waybills 

Note. — The  plural  of  most  abbreviations  is  formed  by  adding  s 
to  the  singular;   as,  lb.,  lbs.;  yd.,  yds.;  pc,  pes.;   bg.,  bgs.;  pkg.,  pkgs. 

Use  of  Figures 

While  no  specific  rules  can  be  given  that  will  govern  in 
all  cases  as  to  what  should  be  expressed  in  figures  and  what 
should  be  spelled  out,  the  following  suggestions  will  be  help- 
ful: 

1.  In  expressing  sums  of  money  amounting  to  one  dollar  or  more, 
use  the  ^  sign  and  figures ;   as,  $123.53;   $25. 

Note. — In  expressing  even  amounts  of  money,  such  as  $25,  it  is 
better  to  omit  the  decimal  point  and  the  two  ciphers,  except  in  con- 
tracts, legal  papers,  and  tables. 

2.  Isolated  sums  of  less  than  one  dollar  may  be  written  in  figures 
or  spelled  out ;   as,  50c,  50  cents,  or  fifty  cents. 

Note. — Do  not  use  the  sign  $  for  sums  less  than  one  dollar.  Thus, 
It  costs  25c,  not  $0.25  or  $.25. 

3.  Express  dates,  dimensions,  and  percentages  in  figures;  as, 
January  2^,  1916;    12  x  2k  inches;   3%  bonds. 

4.  When  numbers  require  three  or  more  words,  use  figures;  as, 
103;    250;    1530;    1,51^0,310. 

5.  When  several  numbers  are  mentioned  in  a  short  space,  some 
of  which  should  be  expressed  in  figures,  use  figures  for  all ;  as,  "We 
drove  30  miles  on  Monday,  75  on  Tuesday,  100  on  Wednesday,  and 
126  on  Thursday." 

6.  When  the  numbers  to  be  expressed  are  not  frequent,  spell  out 
those  that  may  be  expressed  in  one  or  two  words;  as,  five,  twenty, 
forty-two,  two  hundred,  twenty  thousand,  ten  millions. 

7.  As  a  rule,  spell  out  ages,  hours  of  the  day,  distances,  weights., 
and  measures,  when  they  can  be  expressed  in  one  or  two  words ;  as, 
"All  children  under  eight  years  of  age  who  live  two  miles  from  schoc'. 
are  dismissed  at  three  o'clock." 

Note. — Use  figures  in  expressing  clock  time  in  connection  with 
a.  m.  and  p.  m.;  as,  "I  will  call  at  10  a.  m.  or  5  p.  m."  Observe  that 
a.  m.  and  p.  m.  are  generally  written  in  small  letters,  though  some 
prefer  capitals,  and  that  o'clock  is  written  with  a  small  o. 

8.  Spell  out  numbers  at  the  beginning  of  a  sentence  or  immediately 
following  a  colon ;  as,  ''Five  dollars  is  too  much  for  such  an  article," 
not  "$5  is  too  much,"  etc. 


48         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

PUNCTUATION 

CAPITAL   LETTERS 

Rule  1. — The  first  word  of  every  sentence  should  begin 
with  a  capital  letter. 

Example :    One's  first  duty  is  the  one  that  lies  nearest. 

Rule  2. — The  first  word  of  every  line  of  poetry  should 
begin  with  a  capital  letter. 

Example:    For  God  hath  marked  each  sorrowing  day, 
And   numbered   every   secret   tear. — Bryant. 

Rule  3. — The  first  word  of  every  direct  quotation 
should  begin  with  a  capital  letter. 

Example :  Pope  says,  "Hope  dwells  eternal  in  the  human 
breast." 

Rule  4. — The  first  word  of  every  direct  question  should 
begin  with  a  capital  letter. 

Example:  Ask  yourself  this  question.  Are  you  making 
the  most  of  your  time? 

Rule  5. — Every  proper  noun  should  begin  with  a  capital 
letter. 

Example:    Martha,   John   Quincy  Adams,   New   York. 

Rule  6. — Adjectives  derived  from  proper  nouns  should 
begin  with  capital  letters. 

Example:  American  from  America^  English  from  Eng- 
land, Christian  from  Christ. 

'  Note  1. — When,  by  long  usage,  adjectives  have  lost  all  associa- 
tions with  the  nouns  from  which  they  are  derived,  they  are  not  cap- 
italized ;    as,  stentorian  from  Stentor,  herculean  from  Hercules. 

Note  2. — The  names  of  religious  sects  should  begin  with  capital 
letters;    as,  Protestants,  Catholics,  Methodists,  Baptists. 

Rule  7. — The  words  north,  south,  east,  and  west  should 
begin  with  capitals  when  they  refer  to  sections  of  the  coun- 
try, but  not  when  they  refer  simply  to  directions. 


CAPITAL  LETTERS  49 

Examples:  The  journal  is  circulated  throughout  the 
South  and  the  Southwest.    The  wind  is  from  the  west. 

Rule  8. — The  names  of  the  days  of  the  week  and  the 
months  of  the  year  should  begin  with  capital  letters. 
Examples:     Monday,    Tuesday,    September,    December. 

Note. — The  names  of  the  seasons  should  not  begin  with  capital 
letters;    as,  fall,  winter,  spring,  summer. 

Rule  9. — The  words  street,  lake,  river,  etc.,  should  begin 
with  capitals  when  used  in  connection  with  proper  nouns. 

Examples:  Main  Street;  the  Hudson  River;  Lake 
Como. 

Rule  10. — Words  representing  important  historical 
events,  epochs  of  time,  etc.,  should  begin  with  capital 
letters. 

Examples:    The  Middle  Ages;    The  Revolution. 

Rule  11. — When  used  as  a  part  of  a  name,  or  applied 
to  particular  persons,  titles  of  honor  or  office  should  begin 
with  capital  letters. 

Example :    The  address  was  delivered  by  Senator  Dolliver. 

Rule  12. — In  the  titles  of  books,  essays,  etc.,  every 
noun,  pronoun,  adjective,  verb,  and  adverb  should  begin 
with  a  capital  letter. 

Example:  I  enjoyed  reading  "The  Man  without  a 
Country." 

Note. — The  articles  (the,  a  or  an)  should  be  written  with  a  capital 
only  when  used  as  the  first  word  of  a  title. 

Rule  13. — The  words  7  and  0  should  always  be  written 
with  capital  letters. 

Rule  14. — The  words  Bible,  Scriptures,  and  all  names 
of  books  of  the  Bible  should  begin  with  capital  letters. 

Rule  15. — All  names  of  the  Deity  and  personal  pro- 
nouns referring  to  the  Deity  should  begin  with  capital  letters. 


50         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Example:  God  has  given  the  land  to  man,  but  the  sea 
He  has  reserved  to  Himself. 

Rule  16. — Common  nouns,  when  vividly  personified, 
should  begin  with  capital  letters. 

Example:    Come,  gentle  Spring. 

THE   COMMA 
Series  of  Words  or  Phrases 

Rule  1. — Words  or  phrases  used  in  a  series  in  the  same 
construction  should  be  separated  from  one  another  by- 
commas. 

Examples:  Honor,  affluence,  and  pleasure  are  his.  To 
cleanse  our  opinions  from  falsehood,  our  hearts  from  malig- 
nity, and  our  actions  from  vice  is  our  chief  concern. 

Note. — When  two  words  or  phrases  used  in  the  same  construction 
are  connected  by  a  conjunction,  no  comma  is  required;  as,  "Edu- 
cation expands  and  elevates  the  mind." 

Note. — In  such  expressions  as  "A  beautiful  red  rose,"  no  comma 
is  used  to  separate  the  adjectives,  for  the  reason  that  they  are  not 
in  the  same  grammatical  construction.  Red  modifies  rose;  beautiful 
modifies  the  expression  red  rose. 

Transposed  Phrases  and  Clauses 

Rule  2. — Transposed  phrases  and  clauses  are  set  off 
by  commas. 

Examples :  When  one  has  not  a  good  reason  for  doing  a 
thing,  he  has  a  good  reason  for  letting  it  alone.  Surrounded 
by  familiar  faces,  he  breathed  freely  again. 

Note. — When  a  transposed  element  is  short  and  closely  connected 
the  comma  may  be  omitted;  as,  "At  noon  we  started  on  our  way 
home." 

In  the  natural  order,  the  subordinate  clause  follows  the  principal 
clause,  and  a  phrase  follows  the  word  it  modifies;  hence,  when  a 
phrase  or  a  subordinate  clause  precedes  the  word  it  modifies,  it  is  a 
transposed  element. 

When  a  sentence  begins  with  a  preposition,  a  participle,  or  a  sub- 
ordinate conjunction,  it  contains  a  transposed  element.    Subordinate 


THE  COMMA  51 

clauses  are  usually  introduced  by  if,  when,  while,  as,  since,  where, 
though,  until,  etc. 

Parenthetical  Words  and  Phrases 

Rule  3. — Parenthetical  words  and  phrases  should  be 
set  off  by  commas. 

Example :  The  clouds  seemed  to  float,  as  it  were,  lazily 
on  the  summer  breeze. 

The  following  are  among  the  words  and  phrases  commonly  used 
parenthetically:  However,  therefore,  indeed,  perhaps,  too,  of  course, 
to  he  sure,  in  the  first  place,  generally  speaking,  on  the  other  hand,  beyond 
question. 

Remark. — Some  of  these  words  are  used  as  modifiers,  and  when 
so  used,  they  are  not  set  off  by  commas.  Thus,  in  the  sentence, 
"However  hard  he  studies,  he  improves  but  slightly,"  however  is  an 
adverb  modifying  hard. 

Note. — Words  and  phrases  standing  at  the  beginning  of  the  sen- 
tence, and  referring  to  the  sentence  as  a  whole  rather  than  to  any  par- 
ticular word,  though  not  strictly  parenthetical,  are  set  off  by  commas ; 
as,  "Well,  how  do  you  like  it?"  "To  be  sure,  it  is  of  little  importance." 
Some  of  the  words  thus  used  are  now,  well,  why,  again,  further,  first, 
secondly,  etc. 

Intermediate  Expressions 

Rule  4. — Intermediate  expressions  should  be  separated 
from  the  rest  of  the  sentences  by  commas, 

Examples :  The  soldier,  from  force  of  habit,  obeys.  No 
state  shall,  without  the  consent  of  congress,  lay  any  imposts 
or  duties  on  imports  or  exports.  His  story  is,  in  several 
ways,  improbable. 

Intermediate  expressions  are  expressions  that  come  between  closely 
related  parts  of  a  sentence;  as,  for  instance,  between  the  subject 
and  the  predicate,  between  the  parts  of  a  verb  phrase,  or  between 
the  verb  and  its  complement. 

If,  however,  the  intermediate  expression  is  restrictive,  no  comma 
should  be  used.  Thus,  in  the  sentence,  "The  tree  by  the  garden  wall 
was  struck  by  lightning,"  the  phrase  by  the  garden  wall  is  restrictive, 
since  it  restricts,  or  limits,  the  meaning  of  the  word  tree  to  one  par- 
ticular object  of  its  kind. 


52         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Nouns  in  Apposition 

Rule  5. — Nouns  in  apposition,  together  with  their 
accompanying  modifiers,  should  be  separated  from  the 
rest  of  the  sentence  by  commas. 

Example:  We,  the  people  of  the  United  States,  do 
ordain  and  establish  this  constitution. 

Note  1. — A  title  following  the  name  of  a  person  should  be  separated 
from  the  name  by  a  comma ;  as,  "W.  W.  Wheeler,  Secretary."  "The 
address  was  delivered  by  Rev.  E.  M.  Mitchell,  D.  D.,  LL.  D." 

Note  2. — When  the  noun  in  apposition  stands  alone  or  has  only 
an  article  before  it,  no  comma  is  required;  as,  "Paul  the  Apostle;" 
"the  poet  Milton." 

Note  3. — When  a  pronoun  is  used  in  apposition  with  a  noun  for 
emphasis,  or  in  direct  address,  no  comma  is  required;  as,  "He  him- 
self could  not  have  done  better."     "Ye  men  of  Athens." 

Nouns  of  Address 

Rule  6. — Nouns  of  address,  together  with  their  accom- 
panying modifiers,  should  be  separated  from  the  rest  of  the 
sentence  by  commas. 

Examples :  Young  man,  you  must  not  forget  that  talent 
is  only  long  patience.  You  must  not  forget,  young  man, 
that  talent  is  only  long  patience.    Yes,  sir,  it  was  I. 


Compound  Sentences 

Rule  7. — The  members  of  a  compound  sentence,  when 
short  and   closely  connected,   are  separated  by  commas. 

Examples:  Science  tunnels  mountains,  it  spans  con- 
tinents, '  it  bridges  seas,  and  it  weighs  the  stars.  Every 
man  desires  to  live  long,  but  no  man  would  be  old. 

Note. — When,  however,  the  members  have  commas  within  them- 
selves, the  members  should  be  separated  by  semicolons;  as,  "If  we 
work  upon  marble,  it  will  perish;  if  we  work  upon  brass,  time  will 
efface  it;    if  we  rear  temples,  they  will  crumble  into  dust." 


THE  COMMA  53 

Adverbial  and  Relative  Clauses 

Rule  8. — ^Adverbial  and  relative  clauses,  when  restrict- 
ive, are  not  set  off  by  commas,  but  when  they  present 
additional  thoughts,  they  should  be  set  off. 

Examples:  You  have  done  the  work  well,  which  is  all 
I  ask.  He  will  be  here  in  a  few  days,  when  we  will  take 
the  matter  up  with  him. 

Relative  and  adverbial  clauses  are  of  two  kinds :  restrictive  and  non- 
restrictive. 

A  restrictive  clause  is  one  that  restricts,  or  limits,  its  antecedent; 
as,  "Bring  me  the  book  that  lies  on  my  desk."  The  clause  that  lies 
on  my  desk  is  restrictive,  because  it  restricts,  or  limits,  the  antecedent 
book,  by  excluding  all  books  that  do  not  lie  on  the  table. 

A  nonrestrictive  clause  is  one  that  introduces  an  additional  thought ; 
as,  "Bring  me  Success  Magazine,  which  you  will  find  on  my  desk." 
The  clause,  which  you  will  find  on  my  desk,  is  nonrestrictive,  because 
it  adds  an  additional  fact,  the  sentence  being  equivalent  to  the  two 
thoughts,  "Bring  me  Success  Magazine,"  and  "You  will  find  it  on 
my  desk." 

Omission  of  the  Verb 

Rule  9. — When  the  verb  is  expressed  in  one  member  of 
a  compound  sentence  and  omitted  in  the  others,  a  comma 
takes  its  place. 

Example  r  Our  first  object  is  to  obtain  knowledge ;  our 
second,  to  make  a  proper  application  of  it. 

Complex  Subject 

Rule  10. — When  the  complex  subject  of  a  sentence  ends 
with  a  verb,  or  is  of  considerable  length,  it  should  be  sep- 
arated from  the  predicate  by  a  comma. 

Examples :  All  that  you  do,  do  with  your  might.  That 
a  man  thoroughly  educated  in  youth,  and  who  has  ever 
since  been  in  the  habit  of  composing  could  make  so  gross  a 
mistake  through  ignorance,  is  almost  incredible. 


54         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Quotations 

Rule  11. — A  quotation,  or  anything  resembling  a  quo- 
tation, should  be  preceded  by  a  comma. 

Examples:  Patrick  Henry  began  his  great  speech  by 
saying,  "It  is  natural  to  man  to  indulge  in  the  illusions  of 
hope.*'  The  question  now  is,  How  shall  we  know  which 
book  to  select? 

Ambiguity 

Rule  12. — ^A  comma  is  sometimes  necessary  to  prevent 
ambiguity. 

Example:  To  remain  in  one  spot  always,  prevents  the 
mind  from  taking  comprehensive  views  of  things. 

Words  or  Phrases  in  Pairs 

Rule  13. — When  words  or  phrases  are  used  in  pairs, 
a  comma  should  be  placed  after  each  pair. 

Examples:  Honesty  and  sincerity,  truth  and  candor, 
are  enviable  traits  of  character.  The  sunny  morning  and 
the  gloomy  night,  the  bleak  winter  and  the  balmy  spring, 
alike  speak  to  us  of  the  Creator's  power. 

Contrasted  Words  or  Phrases 

Rule  14. — Words  or  phrases  contrasted  with  each  other 
should  be  separated  by  commas. 

Examples:  We  live  in  deeds,  not  years.  There  are 
few  voices  in  the  world,  but  many  echoes. 

THE   SEMICOLON 

Rule  1. — When  the  conjunction  is  omitted  between  the 
members  of  a  compound  sentence,  they  should  be  separated 
by  semicolons. 

Example:  The  blue  sky  now  turned  more  softly  gray; 
the  great  watch-stars  shut  up  their  holy  eyes;  the  east 
began  to  kindle. 


THE  COLON  55 

Note  1. — When  the  sentences  are  short  and  very  closely  connected, 
they  should  be  separated  by  commas ;  as,  "The  fire  burns,  the  water 
drowns,  the  air  consumes,  the  earth  buries." 

Rule  2. — When  the  members  of  a  compound  sentence 
are  subdivided  by  commas,  they  should  be  separated  by 
semicolons. 

Example:  Under  the  fierce  winds,  the  pines  bend  their 
heads;  and  the  mountain  snow  is  swept  away,  forming 
immense  heights,   and  hiding  everything  from  sight. 

Rule  3. — The  expressions  namely,  as,  i.  e.,  or  that  is, 
viz.,  etc.,  should  be  preceded  by  semicolons  and  followed 
by  commas. 

Examples:  We  have  five  senses;  namely,  sight,  taste, 
hearing,  smell,  and  feeling. 

Rule  4. — When  several  expressions  have  a  common 
dependence  on  a  principal  element,  they  should  be  sepa- 
rated from  one  another  by  semicolons. 

Examples :  If  we  think  of  glory  in  the  field ;  of  wisdom 
in  the  cabinet;  of  the  purest  patriotism;  of  the  highest 
integrity,  public  and  private;  of  morals  without  a  stain; 
of  religious  feelings  without  intolerance  and  without  ex- 
travagance, the  august  figure  of  Washington  presents 
itself  as  the  personation  of  all  these. 

When  the  element  upon  which  the  several  expressions  depend 
comes  at  the  beginning  of  the  sentence,  the  expressions  should  be 
separated  from  it  by  a  comma;  when  it  is  placed  at  the  end  of  the 
sentence,  it  should  be  separated  from  the  series  by  a  comma  and  a 
dash;  as,  "Science  declares,  that  no  particle  of  matter  can  be  de- 
stroyed ;  that  each  atom  has  its  place  in  the  universe ;  and  that, 
in  seeking  that  place,  each  obeys  certain  fixed  laws." 

THE   COLON 

Rule  1. — The  salutation  in  business  letters  is  usually 
followed  by  the  colon. 

Examples:     Dear  Sir:    Gentlemen: 

Rule  2. — ^A  colon  should  be  placed  before  a  quotation, 


56         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

a  specification  of  subjects,  etc.,  when  introduced  by  such 
expressions  as  this,  these,  that,  as  follows,  etc. 

Example:  The  Declaration  of  Independence  reads  as 
follows:  "When  in  the  course  of  human  events,  it  be- 
comes necessary  for  one  people  to  dissolve  the  political 
bands  which  have  connected  them  with  another,  and  to 
assume,  among  the  powers  of  the  earth,  the  separate  and 
equal  station  to  which  the  laws  of  nature  and  of  nature's 
God  entitle  them,  etc." 

THE   PERIOD 

Rule  1. — ^A  period  should  be  placed  after  declarative 
and  imperative  sentences. 

Example :  In  every  life  the  post  of  honor  is  the  post  of 
duty. 

Rule  2. — The  period  should  be  placed  after  every  abbre- 
viated   word. 

Examples:  Ult.,  inst.,  prox..  Rev.  John  L.  Dwight, 
D.  D.,  LL.  D. 

Note  1. — When  the  first  syllable  of  a  Christian  name  is  used  as  a 
substitute  for  the  full  name,  no  period  is  used ;  as,  Ben,  Tom,  Dan, 
Will. 

Note  2. — The  ordinal  adjectives  1st,  2d,  3d,  4th,  23d,  etc.,  are 
not  strictly  abbreviations,  and  they  do  not,  therefore,  require  the 
period  after  them. 

THE    INTERROGATION   POINT 

Rule  1. — Every  direct  question  should  be  followed  by 
an  interrogation  point. 

Example:  Are  you  satisfied  with  the  way  in  which  the 
work  was  done? 

Note  1. — When  several  questions  have  a  common  dependence 
on  a  principal  clause,  each  question  should  be  followed  by  an  inter- 
rogation point,  and  the  word  following  it  should  begin  with  a  small 
letter;  as,  "Shall  treachery  triumph  in  this  decision?  shall  robbery? 
shall  assassination?    shall  murder?" 


THE   QUOTATION  MARKS  57 

THE   EXCLAMATION   POINT 

Rule  1. — The  exclamation  should  be  used  after  an 
interjection  or  an  exclamatory  expression. 

Examples:  Peace!  Peace!  Why  dost  thou  question 
God's  providence?     What  a  beautiful  night! 

THE   DASH 

Rule  1. — ^A  dash  is  used  to  mark  a  sudden  or  abrupt 
change  in  the  construction  of  a  sentence. 

Example :  In  the  first  place — ^but  I  will  not  discuss  the 
matter  further. 

Rule  2. — Parenthetical  and  appositive  expressions  are 
sometimes  set  off  by  the  dash. 

Example :  For  two  dollars — the  cost  of  a  theater  ticket 
— you  can  secure  this  book. 

THE  QUOTATION  MARKS 

Rule  1. — Every  direct  quotation  should  be  enclosed  in 
quotation  marks. 

Example:  Henry  Clay  said,  "I  would  rather  be  right 
than  be  president." 

Remark. — A  direct  quotation  is  one  in  which  the  exact  words 
of  another  are  used.  It  should  begin  with  a  capital  letter,  be  set  off 
by  a  comma,  and  enclosed  in  quotation  marks. 

An  indirect  quotation  is  one  in  which  the  thought,  but  not  the 
exact  words,  of  another  is  used ;  as,  "Clay  said  that  he  would  rather 
be  right  than  be  president."  An  indirect  quotation  should  not  begin 
with  a  capital  letter,  should  not  be  set  off  by  a  comma,  and  should 
not  be  enclosed  in  quotation  marks. 

Note. — When  a  direct  quotation  is  separated  by  intervening  words, 
such  words  are  set  off  by  commas,  and  each  part  of  the  quotation 
is  enclosed  in  quotation  marks;  as,  When  Fenelon's  library  was  on 
fire,  "God  be  praised,"  said  he,  "that  it  is  not  the  dwelling  of  a  poor 
man." 

Rule  2. — The  titles  of  books,  magazines,  essays,  etc., 
should  be  enclosed  in  quotation  marks  or  printed  in  italics. 

Examples :  "The  Ladies'  Home  Journal  *"  "Success 
Magazine,"  or  Success  Magazine. 


58         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

PARAGRAPHING 

A  paragraph  is  a  sentence  or  a  group  of  sentences  con- 
nected in  meaning  and  developing  a  single  phase  of  the 
subject.  Each^phase  of  the  subject  should  be  treated  in 
a  separate  paragraph,  and  every  sentence  in  the  paragraph 
should  aid  in  the  development  of  that  phase  of  the  subject. 

Object  of  Paragraphing. — The  objects  to  be  obtained 
by  paragraphing  are:  first,  to  separate  the  different  phases 
of  the  subject;  second,  to  make  reading  easy  for  the  eye 
by  breaking  up  the  matter  into  short  units;  third,  to  make 
reading  easy  for  the  mind  by  giving  it  a  resting  place  and 
a  fresh  start;  fourth,  to  make  the  letter  more  attractive 
in  appearance. 

The  function  that  a  letter  has  to  perform  determines, 
in  many  cases,  the  paragraphing.  For  instance,  the  sales 
letter  has  four  functions  to  perform:  (1)  to  attract  atten- 
tion; (2)  to  create  desire;  (3)  to  convince;  (4)  to  stimulate 
to  action.  Each  function  requires  at  least  one  paragraph. 
It  will  often  be  necessary  to  devote  more  than  one  paragraph 
to  the  development  of  a  single  function. 

Length  of  Paragraph. — The  first  and  the  last  paragraph 
should  be  short — as  a  rule,  not  more  than  three  or  four 
lines.  Other  paragraphs  should  not  be  more  than  seven 
or  eight  lines  in  length.  To  avoid  monotony,  paragraphs 
should  vary  somewhat  in  length.  Business  letters  should 
be  broken  up  into  easy-reading,  eye-pleasing  paragraphs, 
even  when  there  is  but  a  slight  change  in  the  subject. 

When  to  Paragraph. — While  no  rules  can  be  given  for 
paragraphing  that  will  apply  in  all  cases,  the  following 
suggestions  will  be  helpful: 

1.  Every  change  of  subject  matter  requires  a  paragraph. 

2.  Every  idea  that  is  to  be  emphasized  should  have  a 
separate  paragraph. 

3.  Make  a  new  paragraph  whenever  the  appearance  of 
the  page  requires  it. 


THE  MECHANICAL  MAKE-UP  59 

THE  MECHANICAL  MAKE-UP  OF  A  LETTER 

No  matter  how  important  the  message  it  contains,  if  a 
letter  is  unattractive  in  appearance  it  is  likely  to  be  cast 
aside  with  little  attention.  Neatness  and  taste  in  arrange- 
ment are  to  the  letter  what  appearance  is  to  the  person. 

The  first  essential  of  artistic  appearance  is  the  arrange- 
ment of  the  letter  on  the  page.  It  should  be  so  placed  that 
the  left  and  right-hand  margins  are  of  equal  width  and  that 
the  top  and  bottom  margins  are  also  equal.  The  margin 
is  to  a  letter  what  the  mat  is  to  a  picture;  it  gives  to  a  letter 
a  balanced  appearance. 

The  left  and  right-hand  margins  should  never  be  less 
than  one  inch.  If  the  letter  is  short  the  margins  should  be 
correspondingly  wider.  The  margins  at  the  top  and  bottom 
should  be  a  little  wider  than  the  side  margins.  Special  care 
should  be  taken  to  see  that  the  right-hand  margin  is  kept 
as  even  as  possible.  Nothing  gives  a  letter  so  unattractive 
an  appearance  as  a  ragged  right-hand  margin.  Do  not 
crowd  the  letter  too  far  toward  the  top  of  the  page.  If  the 
letter  is  short,  instead  of  writing  three  or  four  lines  entirely 
across  the  page,  write  seven  or  eight  lines  near  the  middle 
of  the  page. 

Another  essential  of  artistic  appearance  in  a  tj^Dewritten 
page  is  an  even  touch,  which  means  that  all  tjrpe  impressions 
should  have  the  same  degree  of  density.  To  secure  an  even 
touch,  the  type  must  be  clean  and  good  ribbons  must  be 
used.  Special  attention  must  be  given  to  capital  letters, 
and  care  should  be  used  to  see  that  the  punctuation  marks 
are  struck  lightly. 

Except  in  the  case  of  very  short  letters,  a  better  display 
can  be  secured  by  single  spacing,  with  double  spacing 
between  paragraphs.  Always  double  space  between  the 
parts  of  the  letter;  that  is,  between  the  introductory  address 
and  the  salutation;  between  the  "salutation  and  the  body 
of  the  letter,  etc. 


60         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 


THE  BERGER  MANUFACTURING  CO. 
CANTON.  OHIO 

October  16,  1915, 


9h*  C«le  MfG*  Co.. 

Albion,  Mlohigan. 
uontleaan: 

*«  arc  aa  yet  without  an  acknowledcfflent  of  our  Steel  Furniture 
catalogue,  nor  a  reply  to  our  lettera  of  Sept.  IZtb  and  Auk* 
23rd,  making  Inquiry  as  to  whether  we  may  expect  favorable  con- 
sideration for  our  Steol  Furniture  Devices. 

Wo  Judged  from  your  inquiry  that  you  probably  had  in  view  the  lfl« 
stallatlon  of  a  Stool  Filing  oqulpment.   If  our  supposition  Is 
correct,  why  not  favor  us  with  your  specifications  fron  which   we 
can  quote  you  our  best  prices? 

*o  are  koeplng  our  fllo  open  awaiting  an  espresslon  from  you 
relatlvo  to  your  disposition  In  this  mattor  and  In  the  event  that  you 
aro  no  longer  Interested  would  thank  you  to  so  advise,  having 
enclosed  a  stamped  envelope  with  ours  of  Sept.  13th  for  your 
convenience  in  so  doing,  for  we  do  not  wish  to  annoy  you  with  unnec- 
essary lotters. 

Trusting  we  may  yet  have  the  pleasure  of  serving  you  and  thank- 
ing you  for  your  attention,  we  remain. 

Yours  truly, 

THE    BER&ER    UPO  .    CO. 
ELPiAdr 


This  illustrates  a  poorly  displayed  letter.  The  side  margins  are  too 
narrow;  the  right-hand  margin  is  ragged;  and  the  letter  is  placed  too 
high  on  the  page. 


THE  MECHANICAL  MAKE-UP  61 


THE  BERGER  MANUFACTURING  CO, 
CANTON,  OHIO 

October  15,  1916. 


The  Gale  Mfg.  Co., 

Albion,  Michigan. 

Gentlemen: 

We  are  as  yet  without  any  acTcnowledg- 
ment  of  our  Steel  Furniture  catalogue,  nor 
a  reply  to  our  letters  of  September  13  and 
August  23,  making  inquiry  as  to  whether  we 
may  expect  favorable  consideration  for  our 
Steel  Furniture  and  Piling  devices. 

We  judged  from  your  inquiry  that  you 
probably  had  in  view  the  installation  of  a 
Steel  Filing  equipment.   If  our  supposition 
is  correct,  why  not  favor  us  with  your  spec- 
ifications from  which  we  can  quote  you  our 
best  prices? 

We  are  keeping  our  file  open  awaiting 
an  expression  from  you  relative  to  your 
disposition  in  this  matter  and  in  the  event 
that  you  are  no  longer  interested,  would 
thank  you  to  so  advise,  having  enclosed  a 
stamped  envelope  with  ours  of  September  13 
for  your  convenience  in  so  doing,  for  we  do 
not  wish  to  annoy  you  with  unnecessary  let- 
ters . 

Trusting  we  may  yet  have  the  pleasure 
of  serving  you  and  thanking  you  for  your 
attention,  we  remain. 

Yours  truly, 

THE  BERGfiR  MPG .  CO. 

ELP:AGW 


This  illustrates  the  same  letter  properly  displayed.  Note  the  wider 
side  margins  and  the  evenness  of  the  right-hand  margin.  Observe  also 
that  the  letter  is  centered  on  the  page. 


62  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


LETTERS  ORDERING  GOODS 

Carelessly  written  letters  ordering  goods  are  a  source  of 
much  inconvenience  and  delay,  and  in  many  instances,  the 
cause  of  serious  mistakes.  In  a  letter  ordering  goods,  the 
following  essential  points  should  be  carefully  observed : 

1.  Each  item  of  the  order  should  occupy  a  line  or  a  sentence  by 
itself.  This  arrangement  facilitates  the  filling  of  the  order,  as  each 
item  can  then  be  checked  off  as  it  is  gotten  ready  for  shipment. 

2.  The  quantity,  quality,  style,  size,  color,  and  any  other  speci- 
fications necessary  to  enable  the  shipper  to  fill  the  order  correctly, 
should  be  given.  When  ordering  from  a  catalogue  in  which  the  goods 
are  designated  by  number,  the  catalogue  number  and  the  date  of  the 
catalogue  should  be  given. 

3.  The  manner  of  shipment,  whether  by  freight,  express  or  parcel 
post,  should  be  specified ;  also  the  route  if  this  is  important.  If  the 
manner  of  shipment  is  specified  and  the  shipper  fails  to  observe  such 
instructions,  the  loss,  if  any  occurs,  falls  upon  the  shipper.  If,  how- 
ever, no  shipping  directions  are  given,  the  shipper  may  choose  his 
own  route  and  method  of  shipping  without  incurring  any  liability. 
The  destination,  if  different  from  the  writer's  address,  should  also 
be  given. 

4.  In  the  case  of  the  first  order,  the  letter  should  contain  a  remittance 
covering  the  cost  of  the  goods,  or  satisfactory  references  as  to  financial 
lesponsibility. 

LETTER  ORDERING  GOODS 
Gentlemen: 

Please  ship  us  ty  freight  the  following: 

10  reams  17  x   22,  20-lb.,  Brother  Johna- 
than  Bond,  white 
4  cases  17  x  22,  24-lb.,  Scotch  Linen 

Ledger 
9  reams  17  x  58,  36-lb.,  Old  Hampshire 
Bond 
20  reams  25  x  38,  36-lb.,  Old  Norse  Bond 
15    "    8^  X  11,  White  Laid  Mimeograph, 

put  up  in  packages  of  500  sheets  each 

Yours  truly. 


LETTERS  ORDERING  GOODS  •  63 

5.  A  letter  duplicating  an  order  should  contain  the  same  infor- 
mation as  the  previous  order.  For  instance,  to  say,  "Please  duplicate 
our  order  of  the  15th,"  necessitates  looking  up  the  first  order,  and  en- 
tails further  correspondence  if  it  can  not  be  found. 

6.  Letters  relative  to  a  delay  in  filling  an  order  should  contain 
a  duplicate  of  the  original  order,  so  that  in  case  the  original  order  was 
not  received  or  was  lost,  the  order  can  be  filled  from  the  duplicate. 

LETTER  ORDERING  GOODS 

National  Grocery  Company, 
Chicago,  111. 

Gentlemen: 

Please  ship  us  by  Michigan  Central  Freight 
the  following: 

15  doz.  pint  cans  Olives 
10  mats  F.  J.  Coffee 

6  "bgs.  Ice  Cream  Salt 
75  1-lb.  cans  H.  Cocoa 

6  brls.  N.  0.  Molasses 
15  pails  #1  Mackerel 
10  cases  Royal  Baking  Powder 
50  "bxs.  Sunlight  Soap 
10  pkgs.  S.  Yeast  Cakes 

As  our  stock  of  some  of  these  goods  is  get- 
ting low,  we  wish  you  would  follow  this  shipment 


with  tracer. 


Yours   very   truly. 


Notes 


1.  No  punctuation  mark  is  required  at  the  end  of  each  item  of  the 
order. 

2.  The  names  of  the  articles  should  be  capitalized,  but  such  words 
as  cases,  reams,  barrels,  dozen,  gross,  etc.,  expressing  quantity,  and 
such  words  as  white,  hard-finished,  etc.,  expressing  quality,  should  not 
be  capitalized. 

3.  If  an  item  requires  two  lines,  the  second  line  begins  a  little 
to  the  right  of  the  first  line. 

4.  The  items  composing  the  order  should  be  indented  far  enough 
to  the  right  of  the  paragraph  margin  to  make  the  space  at  the  left 
and  at  the  right  of  the  items  uniform. 


64  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


Exercise  8 

Order  from  the  Standard  Furniture  Company,  Grand  Rapids, 
Michigan,  the  following  goods,  selected  from  their  1915  catalogue: 
4  #42  fancy  rockers ;  8  #426  hall  stands ;  2  #39  dining  tables ;  6  #94 
bookcases;  12  pairs  #91  lace  curtains;  12  #75  office  chairs.  Request 
that  the  goods  be  shipped  by  freight. 

Order  from  F.  S.  Webster  Co.,  14  N.  Franklin  St.,  Chicago,  Illinois : 
4  reams  #853-^  berkshire  typewriter  paper,  83/^  x  13;  4  dozen  purple 
record  underwood  typewriter  ribbons,  star  brand ;  2  dozen  black  and 
red  record  underwood  typewriter  ribbons,  0.  K.  brand ;  3  boxes  multi- 
kopy  carbon  paper,  black,  7-lb.,  8J2  x  11 ;  4  dozen  2-oz.  bottles  type- 
writer oil.  Instruct  that  the  goods  be  shipped  by  parcel  post  or 
express,  whichever  is  the  cheaper. 

Assume  that  it  has  now  been  a  week  since  you  placed  the  above 
order  and  that  you  have  not  received  the  goods  nor  any  acknowledg- 
ment of  the  order.  Write  to  the  F.  S.  Webster  Co.,  asking  them  to 
hurry  the  goods  along. 

Acknowledging  orders. — An  order  should,  as  a  rule,  be 
acknowledged  as  soon  as  it  is  received.  The  purchaser  is 
entitled  to  know  whether  his  order  has  been  received  and 
whether  it  can  be  filled  precisely  as  given  and  within  the 
required  time.  A  person  placing  an  order  naturally  follows 
it  with  interest,  and  a  courteous  acknowledgment  will  go 
far  toward  establishing  permanent  business  relations. 

Subscriptions. — When  subscribing  for  a  magazine  or  a 
newspaper,  it  is  best  to  state  specifically :  (1)  the  amount 
of  money  enclosed;  (2)  the  form  in  which  remittance  is 
made;  (3)  when  the  subscription  is  to  begin;  and  (4)  the 
name  of  the  publication  ordered. 

Facine,    Wisconsin, 

October    5,    1?15# 


The  Curtis   Publishing  Co., 
Philadelphia,    Pa-, 

Gentlemen: 

You  will  find  enclosed  post-office  money  order  foi 
fl.SO,  for  which  please  send  me  the  "Ladies'  Home  Jour- 
nal" for  one  year,  beginning  with  the  January  number. 

Yours  very  truly. 


LETTERS  ORDERING  GOODS  65 

Exercise  9 

1.  Write  a  letter  to  the  Perry  Mason  Company,  Boston,  Mass., 
enclosing  post-office  money  order  for  $2  for  a  year's  subscription  to 
the  "Youth's  Companion." 

2.  Write  a  letter  to  the  Curtis  Publishing  Company,  Philadelphia, 
Pa.,  publishers  of  the  Saturday  Evening  Post,  asking  them  to  change 
the  address  of  your  Saturday  Evening  Post. 

Note. — In  requesting  a  change  of  address,  always  give  the  old 
address  as  well  as  the  new. 

Enclosures. — Any  enclosure,  whether  of  money,  printed 
matter,  or  samples  of  merchandise,  should  be  mentioned 
in  the  body  of  the  letter,  and  "Enc."  should  be  written  at 
the  lower  left-hand  corner  of  the  letter  if  one  en- 
closure is  to  be  made ;  if  more  than  one,  "Enc."  with  a  figure 
indicating  the  number  of  enclosures ;  as,  '*Enc.  2." 

If  the  enclosure  is*  a  remittance,  the  letter  should  state 
the  exact  amount,  the  form  in  which  it  is  sent — check, 
draft  or  money  order — and  how  it  is  to  be  applied.  The 
reason  for  giving  the  details  is  that  a  wrong  enclosure  or  an 
error  in  the  amount  may  be  detected  and  corrected  at  once. 

Enclosures  such  as  checks,  drafts,  invoices,  receipted  bills, 
etc.,  should  be  laid  upon  the  face  of  the  letter  with  the  top 
and  left-hand  edge  even  with  the  corresponding  edges  of 
the  letter,  fastened  with  a  paper  clip,  and  folded  with  the 
letter. 

Acknowledging  remittances. — ^A  prompt  acknowledgment 
of  a  remittance  should  be  made,  stating  the  amount  of  the 

LETTER    ACKNOWLEDGING    REMITTANCE 
Gentlemen: 

We  thank  you  for  your  check  for  |175,  which  has 
Just  "been  received  and  placed  to  the  credit  of  your 
account . 

We  appreciate  your  promptness  in  this  matter,  and 
trust  that  we  may  have  your  name  on  our  books  for  an- 
other order  soon. 

Very  truly  yours. 


66         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

remittance  and  the  purpose  for  which  it  was  designated  by 
the  sender,  and  when  required,  the  letter  should  be  accom- 
panied by  a  receipt  or  a  receipted  statement.  In  addition, 
the  letter  should  express  an  appreciation  of  the  remittance. 

The  following  letter  from  the  office  of  the  White  Star 
Steamship  Company  is  a  good  example  of  a  courteous 
acknowledgment : 

Dear    Sir: 

This  will  acknowledge  the  receipt  of  your  let- 
ter of  yesterday  with  check  enclosed  for  $50,  which 
we  note  is  to  be  applied  as  a  deposit  to  secure  the 
reservation  of  Room  132  for  your  daughter  and  Berth 
1    in   Room   140    for   yourself    at    the    rate    of    $53.75. 

We    thank   you   very  much   for   this    deposit    and 
will    ask    you    to   kindly    send   us    the    full    name    of 
your    daughter. 

We    should    like    to    call    your    attention    to    our 
travelers'    checks    and    letters    of    credit. 

Yours    truly. 


Exercise  10 

1.  Write  to  Howard  &  Solon,  grocers,  your  city,  enclosing  a  check 
for  $12.50  to  apply  on  your  account. 

2.  Write  a  letter  from  Howard  &  Solon  acknowledging  receipt 
of  the  check. 

3.  Your  customer,  Henry  Evans,  Columbus,  Ohio,  who  owes  you 
a  bill  of  $57.25,  sent,  by  mistake,  a  check  for  $59.25.  Write  a  letter 
acknowledging  receipt  of  the  payment;  call  attention  to  the  error, 
and  enclose  your  check  for  $2,  the  amount  overpaid. 

Wood  &  Cole,  Lynn,  Mass.,  send  you  an  order  for  goods  amount- 
ing to  $216.  They  failed  to  enclose  payment  or  to  furnish  refer- 
ences. Write  them  a  letter,  stating  that  as  you  do  not  find  them 
listed  in  either  Dun's  or  Bradstreet's,  it  will  be  necessary  to  furnish 
the  names  of  some  firms  with  whom  they  have  done  business  or 
the  name  of  some  bank  that  would  know  of  their  financial  stand- 
ing. Explain  that  this  is  a  rule  of  your  house,  to  which  you  must 
adhere.     Be  careful  not  to  give  offense. 


LETTERS  OF  RECOMMENDATION  67 


LETTERS  OF  RECOMMENDATION 

Letters  of  recommendation  may  be  divided  into  two 
classes :  general  and  personal.  The  general  letter  of  recom- 
mendation usually  opens  with  the  salutation  "To  Whom  It 
May  Concern."  It  is  given  to  the  person  requesting  it,  to 
use  as  he  sees  fit,  and  must,  in  courtesy,  be  delivered  to  him 
unsealed.  He  keeps  the  original  and  sends  a  copy  with 
his  application. 

The  personal  letter  of  recommendation  is  addressed  to 
some  individual  or  firm,  and  is  mailed  directly  to  the  person 
addressed.  The  first  essentials  of  a  letter  of  recommendation 
is  truthfulness.  It  should  not  conceal  any  facts  nor  over- 
estimate the  ability  of  the  applicant.  A  few  brief,  pointed 
statements  concerning  the  character  and  ability  of  the 
applicant  will  have  more  weight  than  a  long  letter  filled  with 
stereotyped  expressions. 


GENERAL  LETTER  OF  RECOMMENDATION 

To  Whom  It  May  Concern: 

Miss  Mary  E.  Burns,  the  bearer  of*  this  let- 
ter, has  been  in  our  employ  as  stenographer  for 
the  past  two  years. 

Her  work  has  been  of  a  very  high  grade.  She 
is  rapid  and  accurate  in  both  shorthand  and  type- 
writing, and  is  especially  strong  in  English, 
spelling,  and  punctuation.  She  is  punctual,  thor- 
oughly reliable,  and  possesses  a  marked  degree  of 
initiative.  She  is  a  young  woman  of  pleasing  per- 
sonality and  displays  tact  in  meeting  callers. 

We  are  pleased  to  be  able  to  give  Miss  Burns 
this  recommendation  and  to  have  her  use  our  name 
as  reference. 

STANDARD  MANUFACTURING  CO., 

By 


68  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


Notes 

1.  The  general  letter  does  not  require  a  complimentary  close, 
though  some  prefer  to  use  Yours  truly,  Respectfully  yours,  etc. 

2.  The  salutation  may  be  written  in  any  of  the  three  ways:  TO 
WHOM  IT  MAY  CONCERN,  To  Whom  It  May  Concern,  or  To 
whom  it  may  concern. 

SPECIAL    LETTER    OF   RECOMMENDATION 

Messrs.    R«   L.   Harmon   &   Son» 
Jaolcsonville,    fla. 

Gentlemen: 

It  is  a  pleasure  to  reply  to  your  letter  <yf 
May  25  inquiring  as  to  the  character  and  ability 
of  Mr.  John  U.  Williams. 

Mr.  Williams  has  been  in  our  employ  as  "book- 
keeper for  nearly  three  years,  and  we  have  found 
him  accurate  and  thoroughly  reliable  in  the  dis- 
charge of  his  duties.   He  has  shown  a  keen  inter- 
est in  our  business,  and  we  regret  to  lose  his 
services,  but  the  position  we  have  to  offer  does 
not  warrant  our  paying  him  what  he  is  really  worth, 

We  take  pleasure  in  recommending  him  to  you, 
because  we  feel  sure  that  he  is  qualified  to  ren- 
der you  efficient  service. 

Tours  truly, 

LETTERS  OF  INTRODUCTION 

A  letter  of  introduction  is  a  letter  written  by  one  person 
to  another,  introducing  a  third  person.  It  should  be  short, 
merely  stating  the  purpose  of  the  introduction  and  con- 
taining a  few  words  of  recommendation.  Such  a  letter 
should  not,  of  course,  be  given  unless  the  person  who  gives 
it  has  reason  to  believe  that  the  introduction  will  be  of  mutual 
interest  and  advantage  to  the  persons  introduced. 

A  letter  of  introduction  is  left  unsealed,  and  generally 
given  to  the  person  introduced,  who  presents  it  to  the  person 
addressed.  The  word  Introducing,  followed  by  the  person's 
name,  is  written  in  the  lower  left-hand  corner  of  the  envelope. 


LETTERS  OF  INTRODUCTION  69 


LETTERS  OF  INTRODUCTION 


MP.  Carlton  S.  winner, 
Waterloo,  Iowa. 

Dear  Mr.  Winner: 

This  will  introduce  to  you  Mr.  Garnet  G.  Ham- 
mond, the  young  business  man  about  whom  I  wrote  you 
a  few  weeks  ago.   He  is  now  in  Waterloo  for  the 
purpose  of  looking  up  a  desirable  location  for  a 
branch  store. 

By  strict  attention  to  business,  uniform  cour- 
tesy, and  fair  dealing,  Mr,  Hammond  has  built  up  a 
successful  business  here.   He  is  the  kind  of  man 
that  Waterloo  will  be  glad  to  welcome  and  whom  you 
will  be  pleased  to  know  personally. 

Any  favors  that  you  may  be  able  to  show  him, 
either  in  introducing  him  or  assisting  him  to  find 
a  suitable  location  will  be  appreciated  by  both  him 
and  me. 


Yours  sincerely , 


Mr,  Staige  Davis, 

Charleston,  W.  Va. 

Dear  Mr.  Davis: 

This  will  introduce  to  you  my  friend,  Mr.  E. 
Connor  Hall,  who  is  visiting  your  city  with  a  view 
to  locating  there.   He  is  a  young  man  of  exception- 
al ability,  sound  legal  training,  strict  integrity, 
and  excellent  morals. 

Any  courtesy  that  you  may  show  him  will  be  ap- 
preciated by  him  and  will  be  considered  a  personal 
favor  to  me . 

Sincerely  yours. 


Exercise  11 

Write  a  general  letter  of  recommendation  for  Miss  Carrie  I.  Wood, 
who  has  been  employed  as  stenographer  in  your  office  for  two  years. 
She  is  rapid,  accurate,  and  reliable.  Her  knowledge  of  the  details 
of  office  work,  coupled  with  her  initiative,  fits  her  for  a  responsible 
position. 


70         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Write  a  letter  recommending  Mr.  Harold  Lansing  as  salesman. 
Mention  that  he  has  been  in  your  employ  for  three  years;  that  his 
work  has  been  entirely  satisfactory;  that  he  is  a  man  of  excellent 
habits,  conscientious,  and  aggressive ;  that  he  is  leaving  your  employ 
because  of  the  dissolution  of  your  firm. 

Write  a  letter  to  Mr.  M.  J.  Thomas,  Secretary  of  the  Chamber  of 
Commerce,  Wheeling,  W.  Va.,  introducing  your  friend,  Mr.  John  H. 
Crane,  a  recent  graduate  from  the  Dental  Department  of  the  Uni- 
versity of  Minnesota,  who  is  about  to  begin  the  practice  of  dentistry 
in  Wheeling. 

LETTERS  OF  APPLICATION 

The  letter  of  application  is  one  of  the  most  important 
letters  that  you  will  have  occasion  to  write.  It  affords  you  an 
opportunity  to  bring  yourself  to  the  notice  of  business  men. 
It  is  your  personal  representative,  sent  in  advance  to  create 
a  favorable  impression  before  the  interview.  You  should, 
therefore,  devote  to  it  all  the  time  and  effort  necessary  to 
make  it  represent  your  best  self. 

While  no  set  form  can  be  given  that  will  answer  in  all 
cases,  the  letter  of  application  should  usually  contain  four 
paragraphs.    It  should — 

1.  Name  the  position  for  which  you  are  applying  and  tell  how  you 
heard  of  the  opening. 

2.  State  your  qualifications — age,  education,  and  experience. 

3.  Give  your  references. 

4.  Have  an  appropriate  closing. 

In  writing  a  letter  of  application,  the  following  suggestions 
should  be  carefully  observed: 

1.  Use  a  good  quality  of  plain,  white  paper,  writing  on  one  side 
only. 

2.  Be  sure  that  the  paper  and  envelope  are  clean.  Under  no  cir- 
cumstances should  letters  containing  blots  or  erasures  be  sent  out. 

3.  Have  your  letter  typewritten  if  possible,  unless  requested  to 
apply  in  your  own  handwriting.  If  applying  for  a  position  requiring 
penmanship,  enclose  a  specimen  of  your  writing. 

4.  Write  frankly  and  modestly ;  express  no  doubt  as  to  your  ability 
to  fill  the  position  for  which  you  are  applying.  When  answering  an 
advertisement,  cover  all  the  points  mentioned  in  the  advertisement. 


LETTERS  OF  APPLICATION  71 

In  any  event,  give  your  age,  your  preparation,  your  experience,  and 
your  references ;  state  whether  you  are  married  or  single,  unless  you 
are  so  young  as  to  be  obviously  single,  and  if  requested  to  do  so,  name 
the  salary  you  expect. 

5.  If  possible,  give  as  reference  the  name  of  a  former  employer, 
the  instructor  in  the  courses  you  have  taken,  or  some  friend  who  can 
speak  of  your  character  and  ability.  Never  give  a  person  as  reference, 
however,  until  you  have  secured  his  permission.  Always  give  the  full 
names  and  addresses  of  your  references. 

6.  If  you  have  letters  of  recommendation,  enclose  carefully  written 
copies,  marked  "Copy"  at  the  top  or  bottom,  with  the  word  "Signed" 
in  parenthesis  before  the  signature. 

7.  If  you  are  not  asked  to  name  a  salary,  say  nothing  on  that  point, 
unless  to  state  that  you  are  willing  that  the  matter  of  salary  be 
determined  after  the  employer  has  had  an  opportunity  to  form  an 
idea  as  to  the  value  of  your  services.  If  asked  to  name  a  salary, 
never  say  "Moderate  salary,"  or  "Salary  no  object,"  as  that  would 
be  unbusinesslike  and  probably  insincere.  When  you  name  a  salary, 
take  into  consideration  your  ability  and  experience,  and  the  salary 
paid  for  such  services  in  the  locality  where  you  are  applying  for  a 
position. 

8.  When  an  impersonal  address,  such  as  "A  263,  Tribune  Office," 
is  used,  it  should  occupy  the  same  position  as  the  personal  address, 
both  in  the  letter  and  on  the  envelope,  and  the  salutation  should  be 
Dear  Sir  or  Gentlemen.  This  gives  a  better  appearance  than  to 
omit  the  salutation. 

The    following   opening   paragraphs   will    suggest   some 
of  the  various  ways  of  beginning  a  letter  of  application : 
I  wish  to  apply  for 'the  position  of  stenographer  in  your 
office,  as  advertised  in  this  morning's  Tribune. 

Please  consider  me  an  applicant  for  the  position  of 
stenographer  which  you  advertised  in  this  morning's 
Tribune. 

I  have  just  learned  through  my  friend,  Mr.  William 
G.  Beach,  with  whom  you  are  acquainted,  that  you  are  in 
need  of  a  stenographer,  and  I  desire  to  apply  for  the 
position. 

The  Employment  Department  of  the  Underwood  Type- 
writer Company  has  just  informed  me  that  you  are  in 
need  of  an  experienced  stenographer.  Please  consider  me 
an  applicant  for  the  position. 


72         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

LETTER    OF    APPLICATION 


Names 
position 

States  quail 
fications 


Gives 
references 


Appropriate 
closing 


Muncle,  Indiana, 

August  5,  1916, 


G  52,  Hews  Office, 
Indianapolis, 

Gentlemen: 


Indiana. 


Please  consider  me  an  applicant  for  the 
position  of  stenographer  that  you  advertised 
In  today's  Tribune. 

I  am  twenty-two  years  of  age,  and  am  a 
graduate  of  the  Cass  Technical  High  School, 
Indianapolis,  Indiana,  and  also  of  the  Blank 
Business  College,  Uunoie,  Indiana.   I  have 
had  three  years'  experience  with  Jennings, 
Harding  4  Co.,  wholesale  grocers  of  this  city. 
I  can  take  dictation  readily  at  from  100  to 
125  words  a  minute,  and  am  a  rapid,  accurate 
typewriter  operator.   I  am  familiar  with  fil- 
ing and  other  details  of  office  work. 

I  enclose  letters  from  Prof.  B,  A.  Brown- 
ing, Principal  of  the  Cass  Technical  High 
School,  and  from  Mr.  H.  A.  Gaines,  President 
of  the  Blank  Business  College.   For  further 
information  as  to  my  character  and  ability, 
I  refer  you  to  Mr.  H.  M.  Jaraes,  Cashier  of 
the  First  National  Bank,  Huntington,  Indiana. 

If  you  desire,  I  shall  be  pleased  to  call 
at  your  office  for  a  personal  interview  at 
your  convenience.      • 

Yours  respectfully. 


Exercise  12 

WANTED. — By  a  manufacturing  concern,  an  office  boy,  bright, 
fifteen  to  eighteen  years  of  age.  Permanent,  with  fine  opportunity 
for  advancement.  Give  age,  education,  and  telephone.  Address 
H  430,  Record  Herald. 

INSTRUCTIONS. — Answer  the  above  advertisement,  using  your 
own  address.  Assume  that  the  Record  Herald  is  published  in  your 
city;  that  you  are  seventeen  years  of  age;  that  you  have  had  two 
years  in  high  school ;  that  you  worked  for  the  Smith  Manufacturing 
Co.   during  your  last  vacation ;   and  that  your  telephone  is  1244-M, 


LETTERS  OF  APPLICATION  73 

LETTER   OF   APPLICATION 


125    Palmetto    St., 

Charleston,    S,    C . , 

August    24,    1916, 


Mississippi  Lumber  Company, 
Meridian,  Miss. 

Gentlemen: 

I  wish  to  apply  for  the  position  of  office 
manager  as  advertised  in  the  January  number  of 
"The  Lumberman." 

I  am  thirty-five  years  of  age  and  am  married. 
I  have  had  five  years'  experience  as  correspond- 
ent and  assistant  manager  of  the  South  Carolina 
Lumber  Company,  Charleston,  South  Carolina,  where 
I  attended  to  a  large  part  of  the  correspondence 
and  had  considerable  experience  on  the  road  sell- 
ing goods  and  making  large  contracts. 

My  sole  reason  for  desiring  to  make  a  change 
is  that  I  see  no  opportunity  for  advancement  here. 
I  should  like  to  become  associated  with  a  firxQ 
where  the  work  requires  individual  responsibility 
and  judgment,  and  where  there  is  an  opportunity 
for  promotion. 

As  to  my  character  and  ability,  I  am  permit- 
ted to  refer  you  to  the  Haines-Martin  Company,  con- 
tractors; H.  S.  Copeland,  Cashier  of  the  State  Sav- 
ings Bank;  and  to  Rev.  W.  Earl  Brown,  Pastor  of  the 
First  M.  E.  Church,  all  of  this  city,  and  to  the 
Columbia  Lumber  Company,  Columbia,  South  Carolina. 

If  you  desire  any  further  information,  I  shall 
be  glad  to  answer  any  questions  that  you  may  care 
to  ask. 

Yours  very  truly. 


WANTED. — Bookkeeper;  must  be  rapid  and  accurate,  good  pen- 
man; good  opening  for  right  person.  State  age,  experience,  and 
reference.  Address  J  38,  Evening  News. 

INSTRUCTIONS. — Assume  that  you  are  eighteen  years  of  age; 
that  you  have  had  two  years  in  high  school,  and  are  a  graduate  of  the 
Commercial  Department  of  the  school  you  are  attending;  that  you 


74  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 


LETTER   OF   APPLICATION 


C    24,    Herald, 

Chicago,     111. 

Gentlemen : 

Your    advertisement    in    yesterday's    Herald   for 
a    salesman   who    has    a    thorough   knowledge    of    the 
paint    and    varnish   business    interests    me.       I    should 
like    to   have    you    consider   ray   application  for   the 
position. 


-    ^ ^^^.^^    ^..    Sales- 
manship  and    the    Emerson    Course    in    Personal    Effi 
clency,    applying   the    principles    of   "both   courses 
to   my   daily  work. 

My   experience    has    given    me    a  wide   knowledge 
of    the    paint    and    varnish   "business--Just    the    train- 
ing,   it    seems    to    me,    that   would   make    my    services 
of    special    value    to   you.      You   may   depend   on  my 
taking  a   deep   interest    in   your   business,    because 
I   have   an    intense   desire    to   advance. 

As    to  my  honesty   and   reliability,    I   refer 
yon,    by  permission,    to   Mr.   A.   W.    Jones,    Sales 
Manager   of    the   firm  mentioned   above,   who   assures 
me    that    he  will   be    glad   to   give   you   any   informa- 
tion  you   may  wish   as    to   my   character   and   ability. 
He    is    in    sympathy  with   my   desire    to    secure    a 
broader   field   of   action. 

If    the   position   that    you    have   to   offer    is 
one    in  which   there    is    a  real    opportunity  for   an 
earnest,    ambitious   young  man,    I    should   be   pleased 
to   have    an    interview  with   you. 

Yours   very  respectfully. 


have  had  no  actual  experience,  but  that  you  believe  the  thorough 
training  you  have  had,  which  included  business  arithmetic,  rapid  cal- 
culation, penmanship,  as  well  as  modern  practice  in  bookkeeping, 
has  fitted  you  to  fill  the  position  acceptably.  Refer  to  the  principal 
of  the  Commercial  Department  of  the  school  you  are  attending, 
and  to  some  business  man  who  has  a  knowledge  of  your  character 
and  ability;  state  that  you  are  willing  to  leave  the  matter  of  salary 
until  you  have  had  an  opportunity  to  demonstrate  what  you  can  do. 


THE  SALES  LETTER  75 


THE  SALES  LETTER 

The  successful  sales  letter  must  be  constructed  upon 
certain  fundamental  principles.  It  must  accomplish  through 
the  written  word  what  the  salesman  accomplishes  through 
the  spoken  word.  It  stands  to  reason,  then,  that  tt  must  be 
built  upon  the  principles  of  salesmanship.  It  must  carry 
the  mind  of  the  prospective  buyer  through  certain  funda- 
mental processes,  just  as  a  good  salesman  does. 

There  are  four  distinct  steps  that  enter  into  every  sale. 
These  apply  whether  the  solicitation  is  by  letter  or  in  per- 
son. They  are  what  might  well  be  termed  "the  mental 
law  of  sale." 

Memorize  these  four  fundamental  principles,  for  they  must 
apply  in  every  sales  letter  you  write.    It  must — 

1.  Attract  attention. 

2o  Arouse  interest. 

3.  Create  desire. 

4.  Induce  action. 

Note  how  closely  these  principles  parallel  the  construction 
of  a  good  salesman's  selling  talk.  You  will  see,  then,  that 
the  matter  of  writing  a  sales  letter  is  simply  talking  to  your 
prospect  as  good  sales  talk  on  paper  as  you  would  face  to 
face. 

First,  you  must  get  attention.  This  may  be  done  in  the 
opening  paragraph  by  appealing  to  some  emotion,  such  as 
curiosity,  ambition,  surprise,  vanity,  desire,  or  self-interest. 
It  should  be  put  in  a  striking  way  so  that  the  reader  will 
want  to  know  the  rest  of  your  story. 

After  you  have  secured  attention  you  must  awaken 
interest.  This  may  be  done  through  a  description  or  expla- 
nation of  your  proposition,  or  by  some  specific  suggestion 
of  profit  in  it  for  the  prospect.    The  salesman  can  show  his 


76 


BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


Opening 
secures  at- 
tention by  an 
interesting 
question 


Description 
of  the  propo- 
sition 
arouses 
interest 


Argument 
and  per- 
suasion 
create  desire 


Close  in- 
duces action 


Dear  Slrt 

Have  you  thought  that  because  your  house 
was  not  wired  for  electrioity  you  must  forerer 
continue  doing  without  the  conyenienoe  of  eleo- 
trio  lights? 

If  that's  the  way  you  look  at  it,  you  will 
be  surprised  when  we  say  that  we  will  put  our 
service  into  your  kitchen,  install  a  sixty  can- 
dle-power Uaeda  lamp  just  where  you  want  it  and 
give  you  an  electric  flatiron  for  $12. 

This,  without  a  doubt,  is  a  tremendous  lot 
for  the  money,  but  we  want  to  make  sure  you  are 
given  the  opportunity  of  enjoying  the  great  oon-i 
venience  and  wonderful  benefits  of  electricity. 


And  you  needn't  fear 
service  installed  you  will 
a  lot  of  trouble  and  muss. 
be  disturbed  or  mutilated. 
will  spend  only  a  few  minu 
putting  in  the  necessary  w 
entirely  concealed  within 
Only  the  neat  fixtures  wil 
will  clean  up  any  small  ev 
as  they  go. 


that  in  having  this 
have  to  put  up  with 
Your  house  will  not 
The  electricians 
tes  in  your  kitchen 
ires.   These  will  be 
the  wall  and  ceiling* 
1  show.   The  workmen 
idence  of  their  work 


Doesn't  this  proposition  interest  you--a 
OOmplete  kitchen  service  for  $12  and  twelve 
aonths  to  pay  for  it--Just  a  dollar  each  month? 

We  believe  it  does,  so  we  are  enclosing  a 
card  to  make  it  convenient  for  you  to  request  a 
call  from  our  Mr.  Smith.   He  will  be  glad  to  ex- 
plain everything  that  has  not  been  made  clear — 
with  no  obligation  to  you. 

Sign  and  drop  the  card  into  the  handiest 
nail  box — that's  all. 

Tours  very  truly. 


Here  is  a  letter  used  by  an  electric  company  to  secure  the  intro- 
duction of  electricity  into  the  homes  of  nonusers.  It  contains  all  the 
elements  of  salesmanship  that  have  been  outlined.  From  the  opening, 
which  touches  upon  a  vital  point  in  the  mind  of  house  owners,  through 
the  description  of  the  proposition,  the  logical  arguments  in  its  favor, 
the  persuasive  answer  to  the  fear  of  "muss  and  trouble,"  the  reader 
is  lead  irresistibly  to  the  close  and  the  inducement  to  take  action — 
to  ask  "Mr.  Smith"  to  call. 


THE  SALES  LETTER 


77 


Attention 
secured 


Interest 
aroused  by 
dwelling 
upon  an 
important 
condition 


Argument 
backed  by 
suggestion 
of  what  to 
do — creating 
desire  to  do  it 


Action  is 
urged  and 
it  is  made 
easy  to  take 


Dear  Sir: 

A  picture  of  a  turkey  in  your  window  may 
be  attractive,  but  the  crowd  watches  the  live 
turkey  that  moves  around.  Handkerchiefs  in  a 
window  are  not  extraordinary,  but  a  dealer 
kept  them  flying  with  an  electric  fan  and  got 
a  big  audience. 

What  are  you  going  to  put  in  your  window 
to  make  it  different  from  the  other  fellow's 
and  draw  the  big  crowd?   There  is  need  ef 
eoraething  unusual  to  get  attention  to  your 
window  in  holiday  times  because  then  everybody 
works  overtime  on  his  display.   There's  red- 
hot  window  display  competition  during  December* 

Something  moving  will  do  more  to  draw  peo- 
ple right  up  to  the  plate  glass  and  keep  them 
there  than  the  most  beautiful  "still  life"  set- 
ting.  The  eye  loves  motion  and  seeks  it. 

With  a  lot  of  fine  windows  besides  your 
own,  make  yours  stand  out  with  a  snappy  moving 
object.   The  Dealers'  Service  Department  has 
the  live  object  for  you.   It's  exclusively  for 
the  Good  Housekeeping  Stores  too. 

We  have  bought  several  hundred  motion  dis- 
plays at  $4  each.   They  are  worth  |25  when 
bought  one  at  a  time.   But  we  turn  them  over 
to  you  at  the  price  we  pay,  $4.   And  besides, 
we  pay  the  transportation  charges.   This  is  part 
of  the  service  to  Good  Housekeeping  Stores. 

Read  every  word  of  the  enclosed  folder; 
then  take  advantage  of  this  good  offer  before 
all  the  displays  are  snapped  up.   They  are 
moving  fast.   Use  the  coupon  on  the  last  page 
of  the  folder.   Fill  it  out  and  mail  it  today* 

Yours  very  truly. 


This  letter  is  a  model  for  its  purpose.  It  was  sent  out  by  the  Deal- 
ers' Service  Bureau  of  a  standard  magazine.  Note  how  cleverly  it 
introduces  the  subject  of  more  effective  window  trims ;  how  it  elabo- 
rates on  the  problem  of  window  trimming  in  general,  and  then  offers 
a  solution  that  is-  logical  and  attractive.  The  close  is  made  strong, 
so  that  the  reader  will  be  induced  to  take  immediate  action.  This 
letter  will  bear  careful  study,  for  it  consistently  observes  the  rules 
of  good  salesmanship. 


78         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

goods,  but  the  sales  letter  writer  must  tell  about  his.  He 
must  paint  a  picture  in  words  that  will  make  the  reader 
want  to  know  more  about  his  goods  and  their  value  to  him. 

Once  interest  has  been  awakened,  desire  will  follow 
quickly  if  you  point  the  way.  This  can  be  done  by  giving 
the  reader  facts  and  figures  showing  why  he  should  have 
your  goods.  Tell  him  what  they  will  do  for  him,  how  they 
can  be  utilized  to  effect  a  saving,  increase  efficiency,  save 
time,  ad(}  to  convenience,  promote  health  or  happiness — 
whatever  service  they  will  render. 

Then  in  the  fourth  step,  you  must  "cash  in"  on  the  prog- 
ress you  have  made.  Your  prospect  is  now  ready  to  take 
some  action.  Make  it  easy  to  take.  Provide  a  handy  means 
— an  order  form,  a  postal  card  or  a  coupon.  Here  in  the 
close  of  the  letter,  urge  immediate  action.  Tell  your  man 
to  act  today,  and  make  it  very  insistent  that  he  do  so. 

The  Art  of  Securing  Attention 

The  first  step  in  writing  a  letter  is  to  secure  attention. 
This  may  well  be  called  the  most  important  step  of  all,  for 
without  attention  the  remainder  of  your  message  is  lost, 
no  matter  how  strong  it  may  be. 

There  are  several  ways  of  securing  attention.  The 
following  are  the  most  commonly  employed : 

1.  By  asking  a  question. 

2.  By  making  a  direct  statement  of  an  interesting  fact. 

3.  By  making  a  strong  assertion. 

The  following  opening  paragraphs  illustrate  the  question 
method  of  securing  attention : 

"Do  you  know  that  it  is  a  very  small  and  comparatively 
inexpensive  matter  to  install  a  little  water  heating  outfit 
in  your  garage  that  will  warm  the  building,  and  at  the 
same  time  furnish  an  ample  supply  of  hot  water  for  wash- 
ing down  automobiles,  and  for  other  cleaning  purposes?" 


THE   SALES  LETTER  79 

"How  many  people  pass  your  store  each  day?  Are 
most  or  even  many  of  them  possible  customers  for  your 
line?  How  many  look  at  your  window  display?  How 
many  stop  to  look  at  the  window?  How  many  step  inside 
after  looking?  How  many  buy  because  they  were  re- 
minded of  some  need  by  the  goods  shown  in  your  window?" 

"Do  you  realize  that  a  vigorous  effort  on  your  part  at 
this  very  moment  will  bring  to  your  college  many  of  the 
boys  and  girls  finishing  the  public  schools?" 

"Would  you  invest  $214.84  if  you  knew  it  would  yield 
you  $401.75  in  the  first  six  months?" 

"Will  you  let  us  help  double  your  sales  for  March,  and 
at  the  same  time  build  a  foundation  for  a  bigger,  better, 
future  business?" 

"Did  you  ever  stop  to  think  that  practically  every 
article  of  food  that  is  placed  on  your  table  is  dependent  on 
the  efficiency  of  your  refrigerator?" 


'Do  you  want  to  get  more  milk  and  more  money  from 


"Every  time  you  sell  a  man  a  shirt  do  you  have  a  feeling 
that  he  will  come  back  to  you  when  he  wants  shirts  again?" 

"Who  draws  the  biggest  salary  in  your  business  and 
does  the  least  work  for  it?" 


"Wouldn't  you  like  to  get  rid  of  continually  cleaning 
and  polishing  your  floors?" 

Note  how  the  question  method  of  opening  a  letter  paves 
the  way  to  interest.  As  you  read  over  these  queries  you 
find  yourself  subconsciously  asking  whether  or  not  the 
point  that  has  been  made  is  true  in  your  case.  Thus  your 
interest  is  at  once  aroused,  and  a  train  of  thought  is  started 
that  makes  you  want  to  know  more  about  the  proposition. 
While  this  method  of  securing  attention  is  good,  it  can  be 
easily  overworked. 

You  will  observe  that  the  ''you"  element  is  much  in 
evidence  in  these  questions.  It  is  almost  an  axiom  that 
any  letter  that  purports  to  be  a  personal  communication 


80  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

must  start  at  once  to  address  its  message  direct  to  the 
reader.  A  salesman,  after  his  salutation,  immediately 
begins  addressing  "you."  A  letter,  from  the  start,  should 
talk  "face  to  face." 

There  are  exceptions  to  every  rule,  but  you  can  not  go 
wrong  to  remember  at  all  times  that  the  "you"  element  is 
the  most  important  element  in  letter  writing. 

Next  we  have  the  direct  statement  method  of  opening, 
illustrated  by  the  following  paragraphs : 

"All  day  long — from  the  minute  your  mind  takes  the 
trail  early  in  the  morning  until  you  quit  the  game  late  at 
night — you're  figuring  on  ways  to  sell  more  goods,  to  win 
more  trade." 

"You  would  not  sell  your  steady-going  business  for  the 
face  value  of  your  insurance  policy.  And  yet  fire  at  any 
moment  may  force  you  to  make  this  losing  exchange." 

"You'll  be  as  enthusiastic,  no  doubt,  over  the  propo- 
sition contained  in  this  letter  as  was  the  first  manufacturer 
we  put  it  up  to." 

"Unquestionably  the  dearest  treasure  to  you  on  earth 
is  your  little  baby,  and  you  will  spare  yourself  no  pains 
in  its  care  and  feeding." 

"The  only  difference  between  a  $5,000  man  and  a  $10,000 
man  is — production."         

"Look  at  the  lead  pencils  used  in  your  store.  The  worn 
erasers  mean  that  mistakes  have  been  made.  Mistakes 
cost  you  money." 

"I  want  to  make  you  this  short,  straight  business 
proposal." 

"Your  new  home  will  be  but  a  cold  structure  up  to  the 
point  where  the  woodwork  and  floors  are  ready  for  finish- 
ing. Then  you  will  select  the  finishes  for  the  various 
rooms — change  it  into   a  home,   different  from   others." 

The  direct  statement  method  is  the  type  of  opening  most 
commonly  employed.  It  is  businesslike,  starts  the  letter 
off  well,  and  leads  easily  and  naturally  into  the  body  where 
the  arguments  are  presented  which  it  suggests. 


THE   SALES  LETTER 


81 


Attention 
won  by 
unique 
opening 


Interest 
aroused  by 
showing  an 
intimate  un- 
derstanding 
of  the  read- 
er's problems 


Proof 


Desire 
created 


Action  in- 
duced by  a 
guarantee  of 
satisfaction 


Dear  Sir: 

If  a  man  should  call  on  you  and  tell 
you  that  he  could  solve  all  your  office 
problems  —  that  he  could  show  you  a  better 
system  of  handling  detail--that  he  would 
guarantee  to  develop  a  higher  degree  of  ef- 
ficiency— 

If  he  should  tell  you  that  he  has  had 
many  years  of  experience  in  the  management 
of  large  office  organizations — that  he  is 
now  an  officer  in  a  large  business  training 
institute,  and  that  he  is  also  a  lecturer 
on  office  organization  in  one  of  the  larg- 
est universities-- 

And  if,  in  addition,  he  should  tell 
you  that  he  has  investigated  and  correlat- 
ed the  office  systems  of  the  National  Cash 
Kegister  Company,  the  Burroughs  Adding  Ma- 
chine Company,  the  Sherwin-Williams  Paint 
Company,  the  Ford  Motor  Company--wouldn »t 
you  pay  him  $S  to  work  for  you? 

J.  William  Schulze  is  the  man  we  are 

talking  about,  and  your  three  dollars  will 
buy  his  380-page  book  on  office  organiza- 
tion and  management.   The  enclosed  descrip- 
tive circular  tells  you  more  about  it,  and 
gives  you  the  table  of  contents  of  one  hun- 
dred and  seventy-five  topics  that  are  cov- 
ered* 

Three  thousand  four  hundred  concerns 
have  already  adopted  the  book  as  their  of- 
fice manual.   Send  for  your  copy  of  "The 
American  Office"  today.   Look  it  over  and 
have  your  office  manager  study  it,  and  if, 
at  the  end  of  five  days,  you  are  not  con- 
vinced that  it  is  all  we  claim  for  it,  send 
it  back,  and  your  three  dollars  will  be  re- 
turned to  you  promptly.  . 

Very  truly  yours. 


Note  the  "you"  element  throughout  this  letter.  The  writer  for- 
gets entirely  that  he  is  interested  in  the  proposition.  From  start  to 
finish,  the  interest  element  is  sustained. 


82         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

In  writing  a  letter  you  can  make  no  mistake  in  using  this 
style  of  opening.  The  average  man  will  take  action  on  a 
proposition  that  has  been  half  formulated  for  him.  If  you 
say,  "You  can  cut  your  printing  bills  in  half,"  you  have 
established  a  premise  which  he  will  accept  if  you  follow  it 
up  with  logical  reasons  why.  Do  not  lose  sight  of  the  quali- 
fying word  "direct,"  however,  when  using  the  statement 
form  of  opening.  You  must  hit  your  reader  with  sufficient 
force  to  command  the  attention  you  are  after. 


The  third  type  of  opening — a  strong  assertion — is  illus- 
trated by  these  examples : 

"Your  stenographer  wastes  half  of  her  time." 

"You  pride  yourself  on  watching  the  leaks  in  your 
business,  but  you  are  paying  25%  to  75%  more  for  your 
stationery  than  you  need  to." 

"Don't  blame  your  clerks  when  your  statements  fail 
to  go  out  on  time.    You  are  as  much  at  fault  as  the  system." 

"Get  out  of  the  buzz  class  in  writing  your  letters." 

This  style  of  opening  is  difficult  to  handle  and  should 
not  be  employed  until  you  are  sure  of  your  ability  to  follow 
it  up  with  statement  that  will  turn  the  "sting"  or  shock 
in  it  to  your  advantage  and  leave  the  reader  in  a  receptive 
frame  of  mind.  When  properly  used  it  is  a  very  strong 
opening,  for  it  makes  the  reader  "sit  up"  and  take  notice 
of  what  you  say. 

Too  much  emphasis  can  not  be  placed  upon  the  importance 
of  the  opening  paragraph.  Thousands  of  letters  are  sent 
out  every  year  that  fail  through  the  writer's  lack  of  under- 
standing how  to  start  them  properly.  Imagine  how  much 
interested  you  would  be  in  a  letter  that  started  out  like  this : 
"We  want  to  call  your  attention  to  our  complete  line  of 
furniture  and  rugs.  This  line  has  cost  us  thousands  of  dol- 
lars to  install."     You  do  not  care  what  they  want  to  do 


THE  SALES  LETTER  83 

or  how  much  it  cost  them  to  install  their  line.  What  you 
are  interested  in  is  what  they  have  that  will  be  of  profit  to 
you.  How  much  better  this  merchant  puts  it:  "This  is 
furniture  bargain  week  at  our  store.  You  can  save  25%  on 
the  cost  and  you'll  be  50%  ahead  on  the  quality.  Here's 
why — ."    An  opening  like  that  induces  you  to  read  further. 

The  merchant  who  solicits  your  trade  with  a  form  as 
hackneyed  as  this  will  never  get  it :  "We  take  this  oppor- 
tunity to  solicit  your  patronage.  This  store  needs  your 
trade.  We  have  just  the  furniture  and  rugs  you  want." 
By  his  own  admission  he  is  not  succeeding.  Another  merchant 
sends  out  a  letter  to  accomplish  the  same  purpose,  but  he 
makes  you  feel  at  once  that  he  is  interested  in  you  and  really 
desires  to  serve  you :  "We  haven't  seen  you  in  our  store 
for  some  time.  Are  you  dissatisfied  with  our  merchandise  or 
service  ?  This  letter  is  written  to  learn  if  we  have  offended 
you  in  any  way." 

Be  watchful  at  all  times  to  avoid  the  timeworn  and 
threadbare  openings  handed  down  by  the  past  generations 
of  business  men.  "We  have  the  honor  to  inform  you," 
"In  compliance  with  your  esteemed  favor,"  "Agreeable  to 
your  valued  request,"  and  similar  trite  expressions  of 
meaningless  solicitude  and  senseless  formality  have  no 
place  in  the  modern  art  of  letter  writing. 

The  manufacturer  who  writes:  "Yours  of  the  14th 
received  and  noted,  and  agreeable  to  your  request  we  take 
pleasure  in  sending  you  a  copy  of  our  catalog,"  says  what  is 
quite  obvious  and  unnecessary,  for  if  he  had  not  received 
"yours  of  the  14th"  how  could  he  have  noted  it  or  the  request 
for  his  catalog? 

But  the  manufacturer  who  writes:  "Here  is  the  little 
book  for  which  you  asked.  It's  a  wonderful  book  in  many 
ways.  It  is  written  with  all  the  enthusiasm  of  a  man  who 
knows  through  actual  experience  what  our  system  will 
accomplish  for  the  office  manager,"  has  the  sales  instinct  and 
does  not  waste  any  words  in  placing  his  proposition  before  you. 


84  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

Similar  instances  could  be  cited  almost  indefinitely. 
Make  a  practice  of  studying  the  openings  of  the  letters  you 
run  across  and  then  analyze  what  their  effect  is  upon  you. 
If  you  find  that  the  writer  wins  your  attention  with  his 
opening  paragraph,  apply  what  you  have  been  told  here 
and  you  will  see  that  he  has  employed  some  one  of  these 
principles  and  practices. 

Arousing  Interest  and  Holding  It 

We  have  seen  how  attention  can  be  secured,  but  we  must 
next  know  how  to  turn  that  attention  to  our  advantage — 
to  arouse  interest.  We  must  do  this  immediately,  too,  for 
but  a  fraction  of  a  minute  elapses  between  our  opening 
paragraph  and  the  one  that  follows,  and  the  mind  of  the 
reader,  excited  by  our  first  statement,  demands  further 
satisfaction,  or  it  will  turn  to  other  things. 

There  are  two  distinct  kinds  of  interest  elements.  The 
first  of  these  is  the  •  "human  interest"  element.  Human 
interest  is  difficult  to  describe.  It  is  that  thing  in  a  story, 
for  example,  that  causes  us  to  live  with  the  characters 
through  their  adventures.  It  is  a  direct  appeal  to  the 
emotions.    It  is  to  '*you,"  of  "you"  and  for  "you." 

Remember  that  every  man  is  interested  in  himself,  his 
business,  his  problems — but  seldom,  if  ever,  in  you  or  in 
your  affairs.  If  you  want  to  interest  him  in  your  propo- 
sition, you  must  carefully  weigh  and  analyze  his  needs, 
locate  the  real  cause  of  his  troubles,  and  then  show  him  the 
vital  connection  between  your  proposition  and  his  interests. 
E.  St.  Elmo  Lewis,  the  well-known  business  writer, 
brings  this  point  out  very  clearly  when  he  says : 

"When  we  finally  come  to  understand  that  the  interest- 
ing element  in  all  advertising  is  the  human  element,  the 
personal  element  which  reduced  to  a  general  principle 
simply  means  that  men  are  always  more  interested  in 
men  than  in  things,  we  will  make  our  advertising  personal 
in  both  the  sense  of  the  writer  and  his  business  and  in  the 
sense  of  the  man  or  woman  who  is  to  read  it. 


THE  SALES  LETTER  85 

"The  other  very  simple  human  principle  involved  in 
successful  advertising,  and  always  practiced  by  the  man 
with  a  vision,  whether  he  be  selling  goods  on  the  road  or 
writing  about  them  in  his  copy,  is  the  simple  principle  that 
Madam  de  Sevigne  gave  as  a  recipe  for  good  conversation: 
'Always  talk  about  your  listener's  interests,  his  pleasures, 
his  business,  his  hobbies,  or  his  loves.'  " 

But  let  us  show  by  means  of  illustrations  just  how  this 
"human  interest"  element  and  the  "you"  element  work 
together. 

"If  you  draw  $3,000  a  year,  you  are  a  $60,000  invest- 
ment at  five  per  cent.  If  you  are  a  live  wire — we  know 
you  are  or  we  wouldn't  use  our  postage  on  you — you  are 
keeping  your  eyes  open  for  ways  in  which  to  make  your- 
self an  $80,000  man  instead  of  a  $60,000  man." 

Your  imagination  is  at  once  excited  by  the  clever  com- 
parison of  your  income  and  what  you  would  represent  as 
an  investment.  Perhaps  you  never  thought  of  yourself 
just  that  way  before.  You  unconsciously  rise  in  your 
own  estimation.  Now,  suppose  the  writer  had  introduced 
the  same  subject  from  his  point  of  view  instead  of  yours. 
Some  such  a  paragraph  as  this  would  not  have  appealed 
to  you  at  all : 

"We  believe  we  can  show  you  through  our  knowledge 
of  your  problems  how  you  can  increase  your  income." 

A  book  publisher  pictures  to  you  in  a  very  human  way  a 
condition  that  you  can  instantly  recall  having  been  placed 
in  at  some  time  or  another,  when  he  writes : 

"Do  your  arguments  always  win  for  you?  Are  you 
always  able  to  say  what  you  have  planned  to  say — and 
does  it  always  have  the  snap  and  persuasion  you  imagined 
it  would  have?  Are  you  ever  forced  to  admit  that  your 
adversary  has  beaten  you  in  the  business  of  wits — because 
you  said  the  wrong  thing — perhaps  used  but  one  wrong 
word — at  the  critical  moment?" 

You  can  not  make  a  satisfactory  answer  to  these  pertinent 
questions,  hence  what  is  more  natural  than  that  you  should 


86         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

eagerly  turn  to  what  he  has  next  to  say  and  the  solution  of 

the  matter  that  he  will  offer. 
A  farm  machinery  manufacturer  hits  five  nails  on  the 

head   when  he  sketches  these  advantages  to  his  farmer 

prospects : 

"Did  you  ever  stop  to  think  what  you  could  do  with  an 
engine  on  your  farm?  If  you  only  had  a  one  horsepower 
you  could  run  your  cream  separator — pump  all  the  water 
you  could  use — grind  from  12  to  25  bushels  of  grain — 
run  a  fanning  mill,  grindstone  or  washing  machine — and 
while  your  engine  was  doing  this  work  for  you,  you  could 
be  busy  at  other  jobs  to  be  done." 

He  might  have  told  how  big  his  plant  was,  how  long  he 
had  been  in  business,  how  many  engines  he  turned  out  a 
day,  what  kind  of  materials  he  put  into  them ;  but,  no ;  he 
was  a  wise  man ;  he  realized  that  what  the  farmer  was  inter- 
ested in  was  what  the  engine  would  do  for  him,  how  it  would 
solve  his  labor  proJ)lem. 

A  hat  manufacturer  writes  to  dealers  thus : 

"We  want  to  help  stimulate  your  hat  business.  We 
have  the  right  goods  to  do  just  that  thing.  We  have 
developed  the  hat  departments  of  hundred  of  merchants 
in  every  part  of  the  country,  and  we  are  certain  we  can 
help  you  to  make  more  hat  sales  and  that  means  for 
profits." 

Would  you  expect  such  a  letter  to  cause  you  to  write  an 
early  reply?  The  manufacturer  mentions  himself  five 
times  and  you  are  thought  of  only  twice.  How  much  better 
it  would  have  been,  how  much  more  it  would  have  appealed 
to  you,  if  he  had  said : 

"Two  things  will  stimulate  your  hat  business — the 
right  goods  for  your  trade  and  the  kind  of  good  co-operation 
a  live  manufacturer  can  give  you.  Both  are  yours  for  the 
asking.  We'll  gladly  satisfy  your  keen  business  instinct  on 
quality  and  price,  and  give  you  the  benefit  of  what  we 
have  learned  in  helping  build  hat  businesses  for  hundreds 
of  merchants  in  every  part  of  the  country." 

Never  lose  sight  of  the  importance  of  presenting  your 


THE   SALES  LETTER  "  87 

proposition  from  the  point  of  view  of  the  reader.     This  is 
well  summed  up  by  one  writer  who  says : 

"When  you  have  mastered  the  facts  of  the  case,  then  you 
might  give  your  attention  to  the  importance  attaching  to 
the  point  of  view.  The  keenest  facts  do  not  make  an 
effective  appeal  to  the  mind  unless  they  can  easily  and 
naturally  be  applied  to  something  in  which  one  is  already 
interested  or  about  which  one  already  has  some  knowl- 
edge. Of  what  use  is  it  for  you  to  try  to  interest  me  in  the 
purchase  of  an  automobile  by  telling  me  the  vital  facts 
about  cylinders,  tires,  engines,  coolers,  and  the  like,  when 
all  your  talk  is  pretty  much  like  Greek  to  me  ?  If  I  already 
have  a  machine  and  you  are  trying  to  sell  me  a  better  one, 
dpubtless  that  might  do,  for  I  would  be  supposed  to  know 
something  about  those  things. 

"No,  you  are  approaching  me  from  the  wrong  point  of 
view.  What  you  must  do  is  to  show  me  how  a  busy  man 
with  no  time  for  additional  pleasures,  and  not  inclined  to 
extravagant  show,  can  use  a  machine  to  increase  his  effi- 
ciency, save  his  time,  promote  the  health  of  his  family, 
entertain  his  friends,  and  serve  the  sick  and  the  poor. 
I  am  already  interested  in  such  matters,  and  if  an  auto- 
mobile has  any  application  to  such  things,  then  your 
facts  along'  that  line  will  interest  me  at  once.  Later  you 
can  tell  me  all  about  the  mechanism. 

"In  other  words,  after  you  have  acquired  a  great  range 
of  facts  from  your  own  point  of  view  you  must  turn  right 
around,  if  need  be,  and  do  your  best  to  see  them  from  the 
point  of  view  of  the  man  whom  you  are  seeking  to  impress. 
You  will  find  the  same  facts  taking  on  entirely  new  color- 
ings. It  is  up  to  you  to  pick  and  choose  those  that  will 
relate  themselves  to  the  other  man's  present  knowledge  and 
feelings.  You  have  got  to  start  in  at  the  place  where  you 
find  him,  else  you  will  never  get  the  chance  to  pull  him 
along  to  the  place  where  you  want  him  to  go.  Your  minds 
must  meet,  as  the  lawyers  would  say,  on  some  common 
ground  before  you  can  expect  him  to  follow  your  reasoning 
to  some  conclusion  as  yet  new  to  him.  A  point  of  contact 
must  be  established  and  that  you  can  discover  only  by 
taking  the  right  point  of  view." 

Our  first  interest  element — human  interest — coupled  with 
the  'yoM"  element;  is  essential  in  addressing  those  who  are 


88  BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

unfamiliar  with  your  proposition  and  what  it  will  do  for 
them.  There  is  another  class  of  prospects,  however,  to 
whom  our  second  interest  element  will  more  strongly  appeal. 
These  are  the  type  who  are  as  familiar  with  our  proposition 
or  product  as  we  ourselves,  perhaps.  They  might  be  termed 
those  who  "know."  To  this  class,  obviously,  it  is  unneces- 
sary to  inject  the  human  interest  element.  What  they  are 
interested  in  is  the  plain,  practical  details.  They  already 
know  what  there  is  in  the  proposition  for  them  in  a  general 
way.  What  they  want,  and  the  only  thing  that  will  interest 
them,  is  something  about  quality,  service,  profit,  price, 
delivery,  terms,  and  the  like.  In  writing  this  class  we  must 
use,  as  a  general  rule,  our  second  interest  element — "tech- 
nical interest." 

This  element  gets  right  down  to  business.  It  paints  no 
pictures,  but  presents  plain,  unvarnished  facts.  It  takes 
for  granted  that  the  reader  already  knows  what  he  can  do  with 
a  proposition  and  the  only  thing  he  is  interested  in  is  whether 
or  not  he  can  do  it  with  the  specific  proposition  presented. 
Such  an  interest  appeal,  for  instance,  would  not  dwell 
upon  the  pleasures  or  benefits  of  owning  an  automobile, 
but  at  once  launch  into  a  description  of  its  mechanical 
construction,  the  bore  and  stroke  of  the  motor,  the  lighting 
and  starting  system,  etc. 

Note  how  this  letter  immediately  goes  into  facts  and  figures 
that  are  interesting  to  the  engineer  to  whom  it  was  sent : 
"Early  in  1914  the  Chamber  of  Commerce  Building, 
Detroit,  spent  $142.61  for  Nonpareil  Insulating  Brick  and 
$72.23  for  Nonpareil  High  Pressure  Covering,  to  replace 
other  forms  of  insulation  in  their  engine,  pump  and  boiler- 
room.  In  the  six  months  beginning  April  1,  and  ending 
September  30,  1913,  with  their  old  insulation,  their  coal 
consumption  was  673.97  tons,  costing  at  $2.95  per  ton, 
$1,988.21.  For  the  corresponding  six  months  in  1914,  after 
the  new  insulation  had  been  installed,  the  coal  used 
amounted  to  537.785  tons,  costing  $1,586.46.  The  saving 
directly  due  to  the  Nonpareil  Insulation  was,  therefore, 
136.185  tons  of  coal  at  $2.95  per  ton,  or  $401.75." 


THE   SALES  LETTER  89 

You  can  well  imagine  that  such  information  would  not 
arouse  your  interest  in  their  insulating  system  if  you  were 
not  already  familiar  with  the  advantages  of  insulation  in 
general.  The  engineer  knows  what  they  are  talking  about. 
All  he  is  interested  in  is  whether  their  system  of  insulation 
has  any  advantages  for  his  use,  hence  their  recognition 
of  this  point  in  putting  such  a  strong  testimonial  before  him. 

To  be  right,  however,  the  technical  interest  element  in 
arousing  interest  must  be  used  right.  It  is  better  to  err  on 
the  side  of  underestimating  how  much  your  reader  knows 
than  to  give  him  credit  for  more  knowledge  than  he  has. 
No  one  should  use  this  form  of  appeal  without  having  a 
thorough  knowledge  of  the  proposition  or  product  advertised. 
It  is  easy  to  fall  into  the  habit  of  confused,  meaningless 
technical  terms,  and  no  one  must  be  addressed  as  carefully 
as  the  man  who  "knows,''  for  he  will  instantly  detect  both 
ignorance  and  deception. 

There  are  many  other  ways  of  creating  interest,  but  the 
two  elements  given  cover  the  subject  sufficiently  until  such 
a  time  as  you  are  experienced  enough  to  call  upon  your 
own  ingenuity  and  create  something  unique  or  original. 

But  always  bear  in  mind  that  you  are  trying  to  get  your 
reader's  interest  and  not  your  own.  What  may  be  intensely 
interesting  to  you  may  not  appeal  to  him  at  all.  To  accom- 
plish this  you  must,  as  has  been  emphasized  before,  talk 
to  him  about  himself.  Keep  your  hopes,  desires  and  am- 
bitions in  the  background.  It  is  no  news  to  him  that  you 
want  him  as  a  customer — everybody  who  has  anything  to 
sell,  does.  What  he  is  interested  in  is  why — from  a  purely 
selfish  viewpoint — he  should  buy  your  goods — what  he  will 
get  out  of  it  if  he  does. 

How  to  Create  Desire 

You  have  secured  the  attention  of  your  reader,  aroused 
his  interest,  and  brought  him  up  to  the  point  where  he  is 
eager  to  know  more  about  your  proposition.    But  from  this 


90         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

point  on,  you  must  proceed  with  care,  lest  you  undo  the 
good  work  you  have  done. 

Interest  sustained  ripens  into  desire.  But  you  can  keep 
up  the  reader's  interest  only  by  continuing  to  give  him  the 
kind  of  information  that  he  will  find  interesting.  You 
know  how  it  is  yourself.  When  you  are  really  interested 
in  a  thing,  you  want  to  know  all  about  it.  Suppose  you 
are  a  baseball  "fan."  I  arouse  your  interest  when  I  talk 
about  well-known  players,  and  when  I  show  you  that  I 
know  some  intimate  facts  about  them,  you  are  glad  to 
listen  to  what  I  have  to  say.  It's  much  the  same  way  with 
a  letter.  After  the  reader  and  the  writer  are  on  common 
ground  and  interest  has  been  established,  creating  desire 
is  simply  a  matter  of  leading  the  way  to  it. 

Desire  may  be  created  in  a  number  of  ways,  but  these 
three  have  become  pretty  well  established  as  the  standard 
methods : 

1.  Through  argument  and  proof. 

2.  Through  persuasion. 

3.  Through  inducement. 

In  many  letters  all  three  appear;  in  some  only  two  are 
used ;  but  every  good  letter  contains  at  least  one  or  some 
form  of  it. 

In  using  argument  and  proof  to  create  desire,  bear  in  mind 
that  your  argument  must  always  be  logical  and  sound, 
and  your  proof  conclusive.  Here  you  are  dealing  with  hard, 
cold  facts,  and  they  must  be  presented  so  that  the  reader 
will  accept  them  as  such  without  question. 

Remember  that  the  average  man  is  quick  to  detect 
bombastic  claims.  One  slip — one  misstatement — and  sus- 
picion fastens  on  everything  else  you  say.  In  fact,  no 
matter  how  true  a  thing  may  be,  if  it  seems,  to  the  average 
person,  too  good  to  be  true,  you  should  modify  it  so  that 
it  will  be  accepted  without  question. 


THE  SALES  LETTER  91 

It  IS  not  necessary  to  claim  everything  for  your  product 
or  proposition.  No  fair-minded  man  expects  you  to  have 
something  that  can  not  be  improved  upon.  Overlook  a  few 
adjectives  in  describing  what  you  offer  and  you'll  find  that 
your  reader  will  be  inclined  to  give  you  credit  for  more  than 
you  have. 

When  an  argument  is  presented  it  should  tend  toward 
some  advantage  to  be  gained  by  the  reader.    To  illustrate : 
"Diamond  Squeegee  Tread  Tires  have  all  of  the  good 
.    qualities  of  the  best  nonskid  tires  on  the  market  with  none 
of  their  bad  features.     The  design  of  the  Squeegee  Tread 
makes  them  as  good  on  a  slippery  street  as  any  nonskid 
tire.     Moreover,  they  ride  like  a  smooth  tread  and  wear 
like  one — only  longer." 

Here  every  argument  presented  leads  to  an  advantage 
that  the  reader  will  receive  if  he  buys  these  tires.  And  a 
mileage  guarantee  is  the  proof  the  manufacturers  offer  to 
back  up  their  claims. 

But  suppose  that  instead  of  this  the  writer  had  said : 

"Our  tires  are  the  very  best  tires  made.     We  have  the 

largest  factory  in  the  world  and  use  only  the  best  quality 

of  materials.     Any  tire  we  make  will  outwear  any  tire  of 

another  make  at  the  same  price." 

Right  away  you  would  put  the  writer  down  as  a  first- 
water  braggart.  All  his  claims  may  be  true,  but  they  do 
not  indicate  that  you  will  gain  anything  by  believing  them, 
and  they  are  so  put  that  it  isn't  human  nature  for  you  to 
believe  them  anyway.  Yet  we  see  letters  filled  with  general 
claims  and  arguments  like  these  every  day.  Some  letter 
writers  seem  to  think  that  the  fellow  who  claims  the  most 
is  the  one  who  gets  the  business. 

Keep  always  in  mind  that  the  reader  never  loses  sight 
of,  "What  is  there  in  this  for  me?"  It  is  the  one  recurrent 
question  that  he  applies  like  an  acid  test  to  every  statement 
you  make.  So,  you  must  never  overlook  what  the  prospect 
is  to  gain  by  purchasing — not  how  much  profit  you  will 
make — but  what  he  will  get  out  of  the  deal  for  himself. 


92  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

A  varnish  manufacturer  writes : 

"Try  the  enclosed  panel  for  water  spots.  Take  a  little 
piece  of  cloth,  saturate  it  with  water  and  place  it  on  the 
surface  finished  with  Hilo  Flat  Finish.  Do  this  early  in  the 
morning  and  keep  it  moist  all  day  and  the  next.  Try  this 
same  test  on  any  other  fiat  finish  or  wax  finish.  You  will 
be  surprised  at  the  result." 

Then  he  goes  on  to  state  that  his  varnish  is  a  waterproof 
varnish,  but  you  do  not  need  to  be  told  this.  The  test  he 
is  wilhng  to  have  you  make  has  convinced  you  that  it  is. 
And  if  you  are  in  the  market  for  a  varnish  of  this  character, 
the  answer  is  an  order. 

Putting  the  proof  of  a  claim  up  to  the  reader  for  decision 
is  a  popular  sales  stunt.  It  has  been  found  to  be  good  busi- 
ness to  get  the  prospect  to  participate  in  conducting  a  test 
that  will  prove  a  claim  or  ratify  a  line  of  argument.  The 
above  instance  is  only  one  of  many  similar  propositions. 

In  using  argument  and  proof  this  injunction  is  a  good  one 
to  remember :  be  sincere,  be  honest  and  straightforward. 


The  second  method  employed  to  create  desire  is  through 
persuasion.  But  persuasion  must  be  tempered  at  all  times 
with  common  sense  and  courtesy  or  it  becomes  offensively 
assumptive. 

We  are  not  given  the  right — or  at  least  any  right  accepted 
by  the  other  fellow — to  offer  him  advice  or  to  become  unduly 
familiar  in  offering  suggestions  in  connection  with  his  affairs. 

"Fail  to  grasp  this  opportunity  and  you  will  regret  it  a 
lifetime,''  and  "As  your  friend,  let  me  advise  you  to  take  this 
important  step  for  the  welfare  of  your  business  future," 
are  examples  of  the  kind  of  persuasion  that  you  should  never 
be  guilty  of.  using. 

See  how  tactfully  this  insurance  man  persuades  you  that 
it  would  be  a  good  thing  for  you  to  investigate  life  insurance : 

"There  is  a  certain  joy  in  just  being  alive.    But  no  man 
lives  entirely  for  himself.     There  is  a  wife,  a  child,  some 


THE   SALES  LETTER  93 

one  that  really  makes  life  worth  living.  He  is  ever  plan- 
ning ahead — and  in  those  plans  is  always  included  some 
person  besides  himself.  If  he  lives,  he  may  be  able  to 
carry  out  those  plans.  But  if  he  is  one  of  those  who  don't — 
what  then?" 

Often  persuasion  may  take  the  form  of  an  artful  sug- 
gestion; as,  "Never  a  child  came  into  the  world  but  was 
worthy  as  good  a  cart  as  could  be  afforded." 

What  father  and  mother  would  not  subscribe  to  such  a 
sentiment  and  feel  kindly  towards  the  one  who  voiced  it? 
Here  is  a  suggestion  that  acts  as  a  powerful  persuader. 
"Your  skin — a  skin  the  fingers  love  to  touch — and  only 
a  few  minutes  work  each  evening  will  keep  it  that  way." 

What  a  responsive  chord  this  strikes  through  its  sug- 
gestions of  the  delights  of  photography! 

"A  click  of  the  shutter  and  you  have  preserved  for  alftime 
that  cute  pose  of  the  youngsters  you  have  always  wanted — 
that  infornial  group  of  jolly  good  friends — that  bit  of  road 
you  pleasured  along — or  any  of  those  people,  places, 
or  things  that  have  so  often  brought  the  thought :  *If  I 
only  had  a  camera.'  " 

Persuasion  is  an  all-powerful  incentive  to  action,  but 
you  will  appreciate  that  it  is  a  method  that  must  be  handled 
with  skill.  Never  assume  an  injured  attitude  in  using  it. 
The  manufacturer  who  wrote :  "Seven  times  have  I  written 
you  offering  you  seven  distinct  opportunities  to  take  advan- 
tage of  this  really  remarkable  offer,  and  seven  times  have 
you  failed  to  give  me  the  courtesy  of  a  reply,"  thought  he 
was  using  persuasion,  but  he  did  not  realize  that  he  was  only 
persuading  the  recipient  to  throw  his  letters  in  the  waste 
basket. 

The  third  method  of  creating  desire  is  through  induce- 
ment, and  inducement  is  the  most  important  of  all,  for  you 
may  argue,  prove  and  persuade  to  your  heart's  content, 
but  if  you  don't  induce  your  prospect  to  act,  it  will  avail 
nothing. 


94         BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

You  have  been  nearly  sold  hundreds  of  times  on  many 
things.  But  why  didn't  you  buy  ?  Simply  because  the  neces- 
sary inducement  was  lacking.  The  one  thing  that  would 
crystallize  all  that  had  gone  before  and  leave  you  no  loop- 
hole for  escape  was  not  there. 

Inducements  take  many  forms,  but  they  must  all  appeal 
to  one  fundamental  motive — gain.  This  may  be  financial, 
physical,  mental,  social,  or  any  one  of  many  other  kinds 
of  gain — but  it  is  always  gain — your  gain — if  it  is  successful. 

What  is  probably  the  most  commonly  used  form  of  induce- 
ment is  something  along  this  style : 

"To  prove  to  you  the  confidence  we  have  in  our  product 
we  are  going  to  make  you  this  proposition — we  will  ship 
you  any  McCray  refrigerator  you  select,  and  if  it  is  not 
found  to  be  exactly  as  represented,  we  will  not  only  refund 
the  full  purchase  price,  but  we  will  stand  freight  charges 
both  ways." 

A  variation  of  this  is  the  offer  of  a  trial  for  a  certain 
number  of  days,  or  a  trial  which  takes  the  form  of  actual 
consumption  of  the  product;  as,  "Smoke  five  and  return 
the  remainder  if  not  satisfied,"  or,  "Order  a  case  and  try 
three  bottles  at  our  expense.'' 

The  inducement  offered,  however,  must  always  be  open 
and  aboveboard.  It  may  be  clever  to  trick  your  reader 
into  "falling  for"  your  inducement,  but  if  that  inducement 
leads  a  man  into  believing  that  he  is  going  to  get  something 
more  than  you  are  going  to  give  him,  it  is  bad  business  and 
bad  ethics.  Make  your  offer  plain ;  state  exactly  what  you 
will  do  and  there  will  be  no  misunderstanding  to  clear  up. 
It  isn't  necessary  to  give  valuable  presents  away  to  induce 
action.  The  public  is  reasonable ;  it  appreciates  that  busi- 
ness is  business;  but  it  also  appreciates  that  misrepre- 
sentation is  fraud. 

The  man  who  received  a  letter  announcing  that  he  had 
been  elected  an  honorary  member  of  an  important  society — 
would  he  please  sign  and  return  the  enclosed  acceptance 


THE  SALES  LETTER 


95 


A  logical 
point  and 
conclusion 
that  wins 
attention 


Argument 
that  arouses 
interest 


Argument 
and  proof- 
simplicity 


Argument 
and  proof- 
strength 


Explanation 
and  persua- 
sion 


Inducement 
— read  the 
booklet 


Dear  Mr.    Blank: 

The   man    on    your   pay  roll   who   doesn't 
work    Is   fired. 

The    truck   tire    that   doesn't    increase 
profit    l3    a   grafter. 

The   man   and    the    tire    are    in    the    same 
class . 

Fire   the    tire   and   get    one    that   will    earn. 

A   tire    earns   by   reducing   hauling   expense. 
Are   yours   doing   that?      If   they   are   not,    the 
S-V  will.      If    they   are,    the    S-V   will    do    it 
better.      It   has    20%  more   capacity   for   work. 

The    S-V   truck    tire    is    simple.       It's    all 
tire;    it    iall    works.      There    is    nothing   graft- 
ing  on    its    earning   power.       Intermediate    bands, 
keps,    staples,    flanges,    wedges,    bolts,    wires, 
crosspins--all    are    scrapped.      They   don't   work. 
Business    has   no   place   for   them. 

The    S-V   tire    is    forced    on    the   wheel  with 
no    less    than    25    tons    pressure,    so    that   when 
It's    home    it   can't    slip — can't   creep.      It 
strengthens    your   wheel    as    a   hoop    strengthens 
a  barrel • 

It    has   no    right,    no    left;    there    is    just 
one   way   to   apply    it--llke    the   ring   on   your 
finger.      When    it's    on,    you   forget    it   until 
yon    suddenly   discover    that    you   are   not    chang- 
ing' tires    as    often--that    your    truck    is    run- 
ning  more    hours    per   month--that    it's   riding 
easier   over    the    rough    spots. 

"Truck   Tire   EconoBy"--an    interesting   and 
worth-while    story--malled    to    you    today,    will 
tell   you  more   about    the  worth   of    S-V    simplic- 
ity. 

Yours   very   truly. 


This  is  a  very  convincing  letter,  filled  with  argument  and  proof  from 
start  to  finish.  It  is  one  of  a  series  sent  out  by  a  leading  tire  manu- 
facturer to  educate  truck  owners  to  the  advantage  of  S-V  truck  tires. 


96  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

card — was  flattered  and  induced  to  quickly  oblige.  But 
when  he  discovered  shortly  after  that  this  was  simply  a 
"clever"  scheme  to  interest  him  in  a  set  of  books  the  society 
expected  to  publish,  he  was — and  had  a  right  to  be  dis- 
gusted. 

The  action  end  of  an  inducement  is  generally  in  the  form 
of  a  coupon  or  postal  card.  These  should  be  simple  in  form 
and  contain  the  exact  conditions  or  terms  of  the  offer. 

The  Close — How  to  Get  Action 

A  common  fault  of  many  salesmen  is  that  they  lead  their 
prospect  right  up  to  the  point  of  signing  the  order,  and  then 
"fall  down."  They  lack  the  knack  of  closing.  And  many 
sales  letters  have  the  same  fault. 

No  matter  how  faithfully  you  comply  with  the  rules  of 
successful  letter  writing  as  given  in  preceding  chapters,  if 
you  fail  to  induce  your  reader  to  act — to  do  the  thing  that 
all  that  has  gone  before  was  simply  leading  up  to — your 
work  will  be  an  utter  failure. 

You  can  readily  recall  letters  you  have  received  that 
lacked  the  vital  spark  of  action.  They  attracted  your 
attention;  aroused  your  interest;  created  a  keen  desire 
for  the  goods,  and  then,  somehow,  the  writer  seemed  to 
weaken — he  trailed  off  to  a  vague  conclusion,  expressed 
himself  in  generalities  or  suggested  that  you  suit  your  con- 
venience. 

A  sales  letter  to  be  well  rounded  out  must  have  a  strong 
climax.  The  writer  must  always  keep  the  situation  he  has 
created  well  in  hand.  He  must  tell  the  reader  what  to  do, 
why  it  is  to  his  interest  to  do  it,  and  then  insist  that  it  be 
done  at  once. 

This  is  not  accomplished  by  threats,  force  or  blows.  On 
the  contrary,  persuasion,  inducement  and  desire  for  gain 
are  the  action-compelling  elements  employed.  The  pros- 
pect is  shown  the  reason  why  it  is  to  his  interest  to  order 
NOW. 


THE  SALES  LETTER  97 

There  are  many  inducements  that  may  be  offered  to  secure 
action.    Here  are  a  few  of  those  most  commonly  employed : 

1.  Premium. 

2.  Discount. 

3.  Free  sample. 

4.  Special  price  for  a  limited  time. 

5.  Special  price  to  introduce. 

6.  Guarantee  of  money  refunded  if  not  satisfied. 

7.  Limited  quantity  on  hand. 

8.  Last  chance — offer  will  not  be  repeated. 

9.  Goods  reserved,  subject  to  your  decision. 
10.     Nothing  down — easy  payments. 

The  good  climax  has  two  parts.  In  the  first  part  you 
summarize  the  strong  points  that  have  gone  before.  It  is  a 
miniature  word-picture  of  all  that  the  reader  will  gain  and 
all  that  he  will  lose  if  he  does  not  act.  It  should  bring  him 
up  on  his  toes.  It  is  the  point  where  he  exclaims — 'Tm 
convinced — I'm  sold — now  what  shall  I  do?" 

The  second  part  is  your  clincher.  It  is  the  part  that 
answers  that  natural  question — that  tells  him  what  to  do. 
And  it  tells  him  simply,  plainly,  unmistakingly,  so  that 
he  will  have  no  reason  for  not  doing  it. 

If  you  fail  in  the  first  part  of  your  climax,  you  will  not 
add  that  finishing  touch,  that  ''knock-out"  blow  that  will 
give  you  the  "count."  If  you  fail  in  the  second,  your  victory 
will  be  barren  of  fruits. 

Take  a  lesson  here  from  the  salesman.  When  he  has 
worked  his  prospect  up  to  the  point  of  action,  does  he  ask 
him  to  write  a  letter,  send  in  the  order  next  week,  or  give 
his  answer  when  convenient?  He  does  not!  What  he  does 
is  to  place  an  order  blank  before  you,  hand  you  a  fountain 
pen  and  almost  guide  your  hand  while  you  sign  it.  He 
knows  there  is  "many  a  slip"  and  he  leaves  nothing  for 
granted.  At  the  least  show  of  hesitation,  he  again  drives 
home  what  this  action  will  mean  to  you — how  you  will 
profit. 


98  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


A    POOR   SALES   LETTER 


A  poor  start 

Nothing  to 
interest  here 

No  reason 
why  you 
should  want 
their  goods 

Mere 

generalities 
This  close 
means  noth- 
ing and 
suggests  no 


action 


Dear  Sir: 


gles 


We  beg  to  call  your  attention  to  our  gog- 


If  you  drive  an  automobile,  you  will  find 
these  goggles  indispensable.   They  are  also 
useful  for  general  outdoor  wear. 

They  are  made  with  our  patented  nose  piece, 
which  allows  perfect  adjustment.   We  are  sure 
that  you  will  be  immensely  pleased  with  these 
after  wearing  them.   We  have  hundreds  of  satis- 
fled  customers. 

We  aim  at  all  times  to  carry  a  large  stock 
of  these  goggles,  as  well  as  a  full  line  of  op- 
tical goods,  and  respectfully  solicit  your  pat- 
ronage which  we  assure  you  we  will  endeavor  to 
merit  to  the  fullest  extent. 

Yours  respectfully. 


This  letter  is  of  a  type  frequently  seen  in  wastebaskets.  It  has 
neither  personality  nor  salesmanship  in  it.  A  salesman  who  talked 
along  this  line  would  never  bring  in  an  order.  He  would  no  more 
be  listened  to  than  this  letter  would  be  read. 

Never  start  out  any  business  letter  by  begging  anything.  No  man 
likes  a  beggar.    Moreover,  a  business  man  should  not  have  to  beg. 

The  second  paragraph  indicates  that  the  writer  does  not  even  know 
whether  or  not  the  reader  would  have  occasion  to  use  motor  goggles. 
This  immediately  brands  the  letter  as  a  circular,  for  if  it  were  a  per- 
sonal communication  this  point  would  be  known. 

The  reader  does  not  care  what  the  writer  is  sure  of.  What  he  wants 
to  know  is  what  he  can  be  sure  of — why  or  how  it  will  be  of  advantage 
or  profit  to  him  to  own  a  pair  of  goggles.  That  they  have  hundreds 
of  satisfied  customers  does  not  prove  that  he  will  become  one  if  he 
purchases. 

The  last  paragraph  is  filled  with  mere  generalities  that  mean  abso- 
lutely nothing ;    consequently  the  reader  does  nothing. 


THE  SALES  LETTER 


99 


THE    SAME    LETTER   REWRITTEN 


Secures 
attention 


Gets  the 
reader's  in- 
terest by 
showing  an 
understand- 
ing of  his 
needs 

Good  argu- 
ment for  the 
goods 


Other  uses 
suggested 


Persuasion 


The  reader 
is  told  what 
to  do 

Action  is 
easy 


My  dear  Mr.  Stafford: 

From  your  own  experience  you  know  what 
it  moans  to  your  eyes  to  drive  against  the 
sun,  particularly  on  these  dazzling,  hot  days. 

And  you  know  the  discomfiture  caused  by 
the  reflected  glare  from  the  asphalt- 

Amber-colored  goggles  will  protect  your 
eyes  from  this  midsummer  strain.   They  will 
save  them  from  the  often  serious  after-effects 
of  wind  and  dust,  too.   They  are  not  unsightly; 
they  rest  lightly  on  the  nose  and  against  the 
temples,  and  they  can  be  adjusted  perfectly  to 
the  contour  of  your  head. 

Our  goggles  are  designed  expressly  for 
the  motorist.   They  are  carried  in  stock  in 
thr^e  shades  of  amber,  or  will  be  made  up  ac- 
cording to  your  glass  prescription,  the  lenses 
being  ground  to  order  in  our  own  shop. 

These  glasses  are  not  restricted  to  motor 
use,  but  are  equally  satisfactory  for  all  out- 
door wear  where  the  eyes  are  su'bject  to  undue 
strain. 

You  owe  if  to  your  eyes  to  give  them  this 
protection.  Here,  if  any  place.,  the  old  adage 
is  indeed  appropriate--"An  ounce  of  prevention 
is  worth  a  pound  of  cure." 

Will  you  stop  in  the  store  when  you  are 
down  town?   Or,  better  yet,  'phone  us  to  deliv- 
er or  make  up  a  pair  for  you.   Our  number  is 
Main  1243. 

Yours  very  truly. 


How  much  better  is  the  rewritten  version  of  the  same  letter. 

The  reader  has  pictured  immediately  before  him  a  condition  which 
he  is  entirely  familiar  with  as  a  motorist.  And  note  that  the  letter  at 
once  takes  it  for  granted  that  he  does  drive  a  motor  car. 

Interest  is  then  aroused  by  showing  that  the  writer  fully  appre- 
ciates the  situation  of  the  car  driver  and  what  will  be  of  help  to  him. 

The  manner  in  which  the  goggles  are  made  up  is  then  described. 
The  reader  sees  that  they  will  be  manufactured  individually  for  him. 

And  in  the  close  he  is  given  something  definite  to  do.  The  action 
he  should  take  is  suggested  in  such  a  way  that  he  can  easily  take  it. 


100  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

You  can't  stand  over  your  prospect  in  a  literal  sense,  but 
you  can  in  a  figurative  sense,  and  you  can  supply  the  coax 
or  urge — the  order  blank — too.  Here  is  where  your  return 
card,  order  form  or  coupon  comes  in.  These  are  the  con- 
necting links  between  the  salesmanship  you  have  displayed 
in  your  letter  and  the  injunction  to  "sign  and  mail  today." 
Compare  this  close  with  one  that  follows  it : 

"If  you  are  interested  in  what  we  have  said  and  in  our 
proposition,  we  will  be  grateful  if  you  will  fill  out  the 
enclosed." 

Now  see  the  punch  in  this : 

"But  the  first  order  gets  them — so  don't  delay  a  single 
day.  The  blank  enclosed  will  tell  us  just  how  many  to 
make  up  for  you,  and  your  check  will  insure  prompt  pre- 
paid delivery — scoring  a  'beat'  on  your  slow-moving  com- 
petitor." 

Here  the  inducement  is  a  limited  supply.  You  must 
hurry  to  get  what  is  offered.  And  the  reference  to  your 
competitor  is  a  clever  spur  to  urge  you  on. 

This  installment  proposition  is  brought  to  a  strong  close. 
It  summarizes  in  the  first  part  the  biggest  advantage  offered 
in  the  preceding  arguments,  and  introduces  in  the  climax 
the  suggestion  of  disappointment  if  you  do  not  act  at  once : 
"This  does  not  call  for  the  expenditure  of  a  cent  of 
your  money,  except  for  gas,  which  you  will  find  is  a  very 
cheap  fuel  for  cooking  purposes.     As  there  are  only  100 
of  these  stoves  to  be  sent  out*  in  this  way,  it  will  be  neces- 
sary for  you  to  fill  out  the  enclosed  slip  and  mail  at  once, 
or  you  will  be  disappointed." 

Note  how  logically  and  forcefully  an  advertising  agency 
closes  a  letter  on  a  special  advertising  proposition.  If  you 
have  been  convinced  by  this  letter  that  you  should  have 
this  advertising  how  can  you  escape  after  this  straight- 
from-the-shoulder  statement?  You  can't,  for  it  is  human 
nature  to  want  for  yourself  something  that  has  been  offered 
to  the  other  fellow — to  beat  him  to  it. 

"This  offer  is  not  made  to  you  alone.  We  could  not 
afford  to  do  that.     It  is  for  you  to  decide  if  your  order 


THE  SALES  LETTER  ,,,,,,,,,  JOJ., 

shall  reach  us  first  to  secure  the  exclusive  use  of  this  series, 
as  we  will  be  obliged  to  grant  the  first  applicant  from  your 
territory.  The  price  is  so  low;  the  advertising  so  good; 
the  advantages  so  obvious,  there  is  every  reason  why  you 
should  mail  an  order  right  now — this  very  hour." 

This  letter  carried  a  postcript,  again  summarizing  the 
advantages  of  immediate  action  and  again  urging  that  the 
order  be  sent  at  once. 

Don't  overlook  the  value  of  a  good  postcript,  and  don't 
overwork  the  postcript  idea.  Used  occasiohally,  it  has 
great  strength.  Adopted  for  all  letters  it  will  have  the  same 
effect  as  the  salesman  who  says  a  "word  too  much." 

When  used  with  discretion  a  postcript  may  serve  to  mir- 
ror up  again  to  the  reader  the  principal  points  of  the  propo- 
sition and  perhaps  turn  him  back  from  laying  the  letter 
aside.  It  might  be  termed  "added  emphasis,"  but  "added 
emphasis"  is  sometimes  overemphasis. 

An  office  appliance  manufacturer  has  found  that  the 
simpler  the  task  of  replying  is  made  the  greater  the  returns. 
This  close  is  typical  of  many  of  his  letters: 

"Don't   bother   writing   your   reply.     Just   0.    K.   the 
^      letter  and  return  it  in  the  enclosed  stamped  envelope." 

This  is  a  good  point  to  remember.  The  more  "red  tape" 
you  require  your  prospect  to  go  through  the  more  likely 
his  buying  mood  will  cool  off. 

The  same  idea  has  been  worked  out  by  this  concern; 
but  the  enclosure  of  an  addressed  envelope  would  have 
strengthened  it: 

"Your  business  needs  this  book.  You  can  secure  it  by 
simply  writing  'yes*  on  the  bottom  of  this  letter  and 
addressing  it  to  the  undersigned." 

A  guarantee,  when  rightly  used,  has  a  strong  effect  on 
the  prospect  who  has  been  brought  to  the  buying  point.  A 
tire  company  uses  this  inducement  cleverly : 

"If  the  S-V  doesn't  cost  you  less,  mile  for  mile,  than 
any  other  standard  tire  you  run  opposite  it,  we'll  return     , 
in  cash  its  full  price. 

"We  put  it  in  writing  and  sign  it." 


102        BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Questions,   as  a  general  rule,   will  weaken  your  close. 
Avoid  asking  them.    This  is  a  time  for  decision,  for  firmness, 
for  taking  for  granted  that  the  reader  intends  to  act  and  will 
act.    Questions  play  into  his  hands.    You  are  put  on  the 
defensive.    Keep  cool;   keep  him  in  line.    To  illustrate: 
"Won't  you  please  write  us  a  letter  telling  us  whether 
you  expect  to  take  up  stenography?    Have  you  any  ques- 
tions to  ask  us?    We  want  to  hear  from  you." 

See  how  completely  the  writer  has  lost  his  grasp  of  the 
situation.  There  is  no  inducement,  no  climax,  no  positive- 
ness.  The  reader  is  quick  to  detect  the  uncertainty  expressed 
and  the  whole  effect  of  what  has  gone  before  is  lost — the 
letter  finds  its  way  to  the  wastebasket. 

Equally  inefficient — even  more  so — are  those  timeworn 
and  threadbare  expressions  we  find  in  so  many  letters  we 
receive.  They  have  been  handed  down  from  a  past  genera- 
tion, when  the  sales  letter  was  an  unknown  quantity,  and 
why  business  houses  of  today  continue  to  use  them  when 
they  would  not  think  of  using  the  quill  pens  that  coined 
them  is  beyond  comprehension : 

"Thanking  you   for   any   favors  you   may   grant   and     # 
awaiting  your  commands." 

"Assuring  you  of  our  appreciation  of  your  interest  and 
hoping  that  we  may  hear  from  you  further." 

These,  and  hundred  of  others  equally  devoid  of  either 
sales  or  horse  sense,  are  climaxes  you  should  never  be 
guilty  of. 

Remember,  as  a  closing  injunction,  that  "procrasti- 
nation is  the  thief  of  time"  in  a  letter  as  in  anything  else, 
and  that  in  a  letter  it  is  also  the  thief  of  the  order.  Never 
permit  your  prospect  to  postpone,  defer,  delay  or  put  off 
until  tomorrow.  Today — that  moment  when  he  is  at  the 
conclusion  of  your  sales  letter — is  the  golden  moment,  and 
by  having  the  right  climax  and  the  right  clincher  you  will 
add  him  to  your  list  of  successful  conquests. 


ADJUSTMENT  LETTERS  103 


ADJUSTMENT  LETTERS 


Mistakes  are  expensive;  they  cost  money,  and,  in  many 
cases,  they  result  in  the  loss  of  customers  whose  business 
is  profitable.  Every  effort  should  be  made,  in  advance,  to 
forestall  complaints.  Every  employee,  however  high  or 
low  in  position,  should  be  imbued  with  the  spirit  of  accurate, 
efficient,  pleasing  service  to  customers  in  any  station  and 
under  all  conditions.  The  organization,  as  a  whole  and 
individually,  must  create  a  spirit  of  fairness,  honesty  and 
courteous  service,  and  then  rigidly  live  up  to  that  creed. 

But  no  matter  how  thorough  the  training  and  supervision 
of  those  employees  who  come  directly  or  indirectly  in  con- 
tact with  customers,  mistakes  will  occur.  And  when  a 
complaint  is  made,  you  have  at  once  the  opportunity  of 
cementing  your  relations  closer  than  ever  or  of  severing 
them  for  all  time. 

While  no  general  principles  can  be  given  that  will  apply 
in  all  cases,  a  letter  answering  a  complaint  must,  as  a  rule, 
perform  the  following  functions:  It  must  (1)  impress  the 
customer  with  your  sincerity  and  your  desire  to  satisfy; 
(2)  explain  in  detail  the  cause  of  the  trouble;  (3)  state  what 
you  have  done,  or  what  you  intend  to  do,  and  what  you 
desire  the  customer  to  do;  (4)  convince  the  customer  that 
it  is  still  to  his  interest  to  do  business  with  you. 

Letters  handling  complaints  must  take  into  consideration 
the  conditions  applying  to  each  individual  case.  Good 
judgment  must  be  used  in  shaping  the  course  of  your 
decision.  When  a  decision  is  made,  tell  your  customer  of 
it  in  such  a  manner  that  he  will  appreciate  your  fairness. 

Complaints  must  be  handled  on  the  assumption  that  the 
customer  feels  that  he  has  grounds  for  his  complaint.  It  is 
basicly  wrong  to  take  the  attitude  that  a  complaint  is 
merely  a  groundless  endeavor  to  derive  an  unfair  advantage 
of  you.  Remember  that  most  people  want  to  be  fair.  In 
making  a  complaint  to  you,  they  believe  that  they  are  in 


104  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 


ADJUSTMENT  LETTER 


Courteous 
acknowledg- 
ment of 
complaint 

States  facts 
in  the  case 
and  shows 
probable 
cause  of 
delay 


Tells  whtt 
you  have 
done  and 
what  you  in- 
tend to  do 

Expresses 
sincere  regret 
at  the  delay 


Gentloment 

We  thank  you  for  your  letter  of  April 
10  In  which  you  call  our  attention  to  the 
fact  that  you  have  not  received  the  goods 
ordered  by  you  on  March  22. 

On  referring  to  our  records,  we  find 
that  your  order  left  our  shipping  depart- 
ment on  March  25.   According  to  the  usual 
time  required  for  shipments  to  reach  your 
city,  you  should  have  received  these  goods 
by  April  5  at  the  very  latest.   It  some- 
times happens,  however,  that  shipments  are 
misplaced  or  unduly  delayed  by  the  rail- 
road company,  and  this  has  no  doubt  been 
the  case  with  your  order. 

We  have  today  started  a  tracer  after 
the  goods.   If  they  are  not  located  within 
the  next  two  or  three  days,  we  will  send 
you  a  duplicate  shipment. 

We  deeply  regret  this  delay,  but  we 
know  you  will  understand  it  is  one  of 
those  unfortunate  occurrences  that  are  be- 
yond our  control.   Clearly  the  railroad 
company  is  to  blame  in  this  instance.   We 
shall  do  everything  in  our  power  to  see 
that  such  a  delay  does  not  occur  again. 

Tours  truly. 


the  right  and  are,  therefore,  entu-ely  fair  in  their  attitude. 
You  must  respect  this  view,  feeling  sure  that  when  all  the 
facts  of  the  case  are  presented,  the  customer's  sense  of  fair 
play  will  grant  your  point  if  the  complaint  is  an  unreasonable 
one. 

It  is  far  better  to  appeal  to  the  customer's  fairness,  and 
make  him  see  the  matter  as  you  do,  than  to  arbitrarily  lay 
down  an  unexplained  decision.  If  you  must  decline  to 
grant  a  concession,  show  the  customer  your  reasons  for 
declining,  and  convince  him  of  the  fairness  of  your  position. 


ADJUSTMENT  LETTERS 


105 


ADJUSTMENT   LETTER 


Courteous 
acknowledg- 
ment 

Minimizes 
objections 


Shows  ad- 
vantage of 
keeping  the 
suit 


Tactfully  ex- 
plains why 
the  conces- 
sion can  not 
be  made 


Asks  for  fu- 
ture business 


Dear  Sir: 

We  regret  to  learn  from  your  letter  of 
June  24  that  the  suit  we  made  for  you  does 
not  please  you  In  every  way. 

It  is  often  difficult,  you  know,  to  tell 
from  a  pattern  just  how  a  suit  will  look  when 
made  up.  You  would  have  the  same  difficulty, 
however,. if  you  ordered  your  suit  of  your  lo- 
cal tailor,  for  you  would  have  to  select  the 
suit  from  a  pattern  and  then  choose  the  style 
from  a  fashion  plate.  This  is  Just  what  you 
did  with  us . 

We  are  gratified  to  know  that  the  suit 
fits  you  perfectly  and  that  you  are  pleased 
with  the  workmanship.   If  you  will  wear  the 
suit  a  few  times,  we  believe  you  will  like 
it.   It  is  certainly  a  fine  piece  of  goods-- 
one  that  will  give  you  good  service  and  hold 
its  shape  well.   And  it  cost  you  much  less 
than  you  would  have  to  pay  your  local  tailor 
for  the  same  suit. 

As  stated  in  our  catalogue,  we  cannot 
take  back  made-to-order  suits,  for  the  rea- 
son that  they  are  made  to  individual  measure- 
ments, and  while  this  suit  fits  you  perfectly, 
it  is  not  likely  that  we  could  find  another 
person  that  it  would  fit.   When  you  take  these 
facts  into  consideration,  we  believe  you  will 
see  the  fairness  of  our  position. 

We  sincerely  trust  that  you  will  not  hold 
us  responsible  for  what  was  clearly  beyond  our 
control.   When  you  order  your  next  suit,  give 
us  another  chance,  and  we  will  make  a  special 
effort  to  please  you  in  every  way. 

Tours  very  truly. 


Furthermore,  complaints  can  not  always  be  decided 
entirely  on  their  merits.  Not  always  is  the  customer  right 
and  your  establishment  wrong,  but  it  would  be  highly 
undiplomatic  for  you  to  reply  in  so  many  words  to  that 
effect.     Policy  frequently  dictates  that  it  is  profitable  to 


106       BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

accept  the  customer's  claims  without  question,  even  though 
they  may  not  be  wholly  warranted. 

Any  angry  or  caustic  retorts  are,  of  course,  to  be  strictly 
avoided.  Even  if  the  complaint  is  couched  in  highly  offensive 
and  unjustifiable  language,  you  must  retain  your  dignity. 
A  courteous  reply  will,  in  all  probability,  make  the  customer 
a  trifle  ashamed  of  himself  for  so  quickly  giving  vent  to 
his  feelings,  while  a  **hot"  reply  will  only  fan  the  flame  of 
his  temper. 

In  many  instances  the  complaint  is  based  on  a  misunder- 
standing. When  such  is  the  case,  you  must  show  that  you 
have  a  clear  and  correct  conception  of  the  matter  without 
reflecting  upon  the  customer's  intelligence  or  integrity. 
Perhaps  the  customer  has  but  a  slight  knowledge  of  the 
manner  in  which  your  goods  may  be  used,  in  which  case, 
it  is  necessary  for  you  to  resell  the  goods,  to  explain  and 
point  out  to  the  customer  the  reasons  why  it  is  to  his  or 
her  advantage  to  retain  and  use  them. 

Complaints  regarding  purchases  should  be  at  once  rec- 
tified. Complaints  regarding  service  should  be  promptly 
investigated  and  traced  down  to  the  guilty  person.  In 
every  case,  the  customer  is  to  be  promptly  and  graciously 
satisfied. 

By  all  means  avoid  arguments.  Do  not  allow  yourself 
to  be  drawn  into  a  long  controversy,  for  a  tardy  concession 
has  every  appearance  of  a  reluctant  and  forced  one.  If  a 
concession  is  made,  let  it  be  made  promptly,  cheerfully 
and  courteously.  It  will  then  impress  the  customer  with 
your  open-mindedness  and  your  desire  to  allow  no  minor 
differences  to  stand  between  your  amicable  business  rela- 
tions. A  concession  begrudgingly  made  is  little  better 
than  none. 

A  man  purchased  a  cut-glass  set  at  Wanamaker's  New 
York  store,  and  instructed  that  it  be  sent  by  express  to 
another  city,  where  he  was  going  to  attend  a  wedding. 
When  the  set  was  received,  one  of  the  pieces  was  broken. 


ADJUSTMENT  LETTERS  107 

The  customer  was  particularly  put  out  because  he  wanted 
the  cut  glass  in  time  to  present  it  before  the  wedding, 
which  was  to  take  place  three  days  later.    He  wrote  Wana- 
maker,  registering  a  vigorous  complaint. 
This  complaint  might  have  been  answered  in  this  way: 

Dear  Sir: 

We  regret  to  learn  that  the  cut  glass  purchased  by  you 
failed  to  reach  its  destination  in  good  condition. 

This  purchase  was  in  first-class  condition  when  we 
delivered  it  to  the  transportation  company,  as  our  receipt 
from  them  shows.  Naturally  our  responsibility  ended 
when  we  delivered  the  package  to  the  express  company. 
What  happened  after  they  took  it  is  their  fault— not 
ours. 

If  you  will  take  this  matter  up  with  the  local  express 
agent,  you  will  no  doubt  be  able  to  obtain  equitable 
settlement. 

Yours  truly. 

And  the  customer  would  have  been  most  thoroughly 
disgusted  with  the  store  and  its  methods  of  doing  business. 
As  a  matter  of  fact  this  letter  came  from  Wanamaker's  by 
return  mail: 

Dear  Sir: 

We  are  sending  you  today  another  piece  to  your  cut- 
glass  set. 

It  is  a  source  of  great  regret  to  us  that  you  should  have 
been  inconvenienced  by  carelessness  on  our  part. 

Please  make  whatever  disposition  you  wish  of  the 
broken  piece. 

Yours  very  truly, 

This  piece  of  cut  glass  reached  the  customer  on  the  same 
day  as  the  letter,  and  he  was  able  to  present  his  wedding 
present  in  perfect  condition. 

Notice  in  this  letter  the  instant  and  unqualified  decision 
regarding  the  complaint,  and  observe  also  that  the  shipping 
department  was  speeded  up  to  make  the  restitution  in  time 
for  it  to  accomplish  its  purpose.  No  proof  was  demanded 
that  the  cut  glass  was  broken.  The  customer's  word  was 
accepted  as  absolute  proof. 


108  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

This  man,  naturally  feeling  angry  at  the  miscarriage  of 
his  plans,  was  so  won  over  by  this  open-minded  and  broad- 
gauged  handling  of  his  complaint  that  he  at  once  wrote  a 
letter  of  thanks  pledging  that  Wanamaker's  would  in  the 
future  receive  every  penny  of  his  trade.  Yet,  an  unskilled 
handling  of  the  complaint — a  day  of  delay — would  have 
destroyed  the  good- will  of  the  store  in  this  man's  mind. 

A  woman  bought  a  pair  of  white  silk  gloves  with  black 
stitching  on  the  back.  The  clerk  assured  her  the  black 
would  not  "run"  when  the  gloves  were  washed.  The 
customer  washed  them  according  to  the  directions  furnished 
with  the  gloves.  The  black  "ran"  and  spoiled  the  gloves. 
She  returned  the  gloves  with  a  courteous  letter  stating  the 
facts  and  requesting  that  the  purchase  price  be  refunded. 
This  is  the  letter  she  received: 

Dear  Madam: 

We  have  received  the  silk  gloves  you  mention  in  your 
letter  of  the  second,  and  are  at  a  loss  to  understand  how 
the  trouble  could  have  happened. 

All  of  our  gloves  are  carefully  selected  when  the  stocks 
are  purchased  and  especial  attention  is  given  to  the  fast- 
ness of  the  black  thread  used  in  stitching.  This  black  is 
guaranteed  not  to  "run'*  when  the  gloves  are  washed. 

It  must  be  that  you  did  not  carefully  observe  the 
instructions  for  washing  them,  as  given  on  the  little  tag 
attached  to  the  gloves.  If  you  had  used  lukewarm  water, 
as  directed,  this  trouble  would  not  have  happened. 

We  are,  therefore,  returning  your  gloves  to  you,  as  we 
can  not  see  wherein  we  are  to  blame  for  the  trouble. 

Yours  truly, 

This  letter  illustrates  the  wrong  attitude  in  answering  a 
letter  of  complaint;  it  not  only  lays  the  blame  on  the 
customer,  but  actually  casts  insinuations  on  her  veracity, 
inasmuch  as  she  mentioned  explicitly  that  she  had  used 
lukewarm  water. 

She  was  content  to  allow  the  matter  to  drop,  as  the  price 
of  the  gloves  was  a  small  amount.    But  she  firmly  resolved 


ADJUSTMENT  LETTERS  109 

never  to  go  into  that  store  again,  and  she  had  no  hesitancy 
in  telling  her^  friends  of  her  experience. 

Her  husband,  upon  hearing  the  details,  took  the  matter 
in  hand  and  wrote  a  most  vigorous  letter  to  the  store, 
demanding  a  proper  settlement  and  an  apology  for  what 
he  considered  a  slur  in  questioning  his  wife's  veracity.  He 
received  this  letter: 

Dear  Sir: 

Your  letter  of  the  twelfth  does  not  alter  the  aspect  of 
the  situation  in  regard  to  the  liability  for  the  damage 
done  to  your  wife's  gloves. 

As  we  previously  stated,  if  the  gloves  were  washed  in 
accordance  with  the  instructions  given,  the  color  will  not 
run. 

However,  as  you  seem  so  intent  to  consider  this  a 
matter  of  considerable  importance  and  rather  than  incur 
the  expense  of  extended  correspondence,  we  are  enclosing 
our  check  for  the  amount  of  the  gloves. 

Yours  truly, 

This  woman  never  tired  of  relating  that  Blank's  was  a 
disagreeable  firm  to  trade  with  and  that  the  only  way  she 
received  satisfaction  was  by  having  her  husband  use  force. 

Such  a  concession  did  little  good.  It  was  not  willingly 
and  gladly  given.    It  was  extracted  by  force. 

How  different  would  have  been  the  situation  if  the  store 
had  written  a  letter  similar  to  this: 

Dear  Madam: 

Enclosed  is  a  duebill  for  two  dollars,  which  you  may 
exchange  for  cash  if  you  desire,  or  use  just  the  same  as 
money  when  you  make  future  purchases  in  the  Blank 
Store. 

We  can  not  understand  what  could  have  caused  your 
gloves  to  "run"  as  they  did.  We  watch  our  stocks  care- 
fully, but  as  you  exercised  every  care  in  washing  them, 
it  must  be  that  a  defective  pair  slipped  past  our  inspectors. 

We  are  very  sorry  that  you  should  have  been  annoyed 
in  this  way  and  assure  you  that  we  strive  to  make  every 
transaction  a  wholly  satisfactory  one. 


110       BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

Would  you  like  to  have  us  send  you  another  pair  of 
gloves — that  surely  won't  "run" — in  exchange  for  the 
duebill?    Or  is  there  anything  else  we  could  sen  A  instead? 

Yours  very  truly, 

Such  a  letter  would  have  amounted  to  the  same  con- 
cession as  made  in  the  other  way,  but  at  what  a  difference 
in  tact  and  retained  friendship. 

Exercise  13 

J.  M.  Wilbur,  Huntington,  W.  Va.,  ordered  by  express  one  dozen 
Multigraph  ribbons  from  the  Neidich  Process  Company,  Burlington, 
N.  J.  After  waiting  ten  days  for  the  goods,  Mr.  Wilbur  writes  that 
he  has  not  received  the  ribbons.  He  states  that  he  has  been  com- 
pelled to  hold  up  some  work  for  one  of  his  best  customers  because  of 
the  delay.  Write  the  complaint  letter  for  Mr.  Wilbur  to  the  Neidich 
Process  Company. 

Write  the  reply  from  the  Neidich  Process  Company.  Explain  that 
on  examining  the  records  they  find  there  was  a  delay  of  six  days  in 
getting  the  order  out,  due  to  the  fact  that  they  were  so  far  behind 
with  orders.     State  that  the  goods  were  shipped  yesterday. 

Several  days  ago  you  shipped  an  order  of  goods  by  express  to  Finch 
&  Brown,  Wheeling,  W.  Virginia.  They  write  that  the  goods  have 
not  been  received.  Write  the  American  Express  Company  of  your 
city,  asking  them  to  put  a  tracer  after  the  shipment.  Give  the  neces- 
sary information. 

Write  to  Finch  &  Brown.  Explain  that  the  goods  were  delivered 
to  the  express  company  on  (give  exact  date);  that  the  delay  is  evi- 
dently due  to  the  way  the  shipment  was  handled  by  the  express  com- 
pany. State  that  you  have  written  the  express  company,  asking 
them  to  put  a  tracer  after  the  shipment.  Add  that  unless  the  express 
company  reports  delivery  within  two  or  three  days,  you  will  duplicate 
the  shipment. 


UMiUlMHIillMiiMlIlIlIlIi 

m 

i      "The  man  who  can  write  a  letter  that  does  what 

I  another  man  must  make  a  personal  call  to  do,  is 

I  the  greatest,  most  independent  power  in   the 

1  modern  business  world." 


THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  111 

THE  COLLECTION  LETTER 

The;  collection  letter  is  one  of  the  most  difficult  of  all 
letters  to  write,  for  the  reason  that  it  must  induce  a  person 
to  do  that  which  he  is  inclined  to  put  off  until  a  more  con- 
venient time,  or  until  the  demands  on  his  pocketbook  are 
less  pressing,  and  for  the  reason  that  it  must,  at  the  same 
time,  retain  the  good  will  of  the  customer. 

The  first  essential  of  a  good  collection  system  requires 
that  statements  be  sent  out  exactly  on  time.  On  the  last  of 
each  month  a  statement  should  be  rendered  so  as  to  reach 
the  customer  on  the  first  or  second  of  the  month.  If  there 
is  a  delay  in  sending  out  statements,  the  customer  naturally 
feels  that  it  is  not  important  that  he  settle  promptly. 

In  treating  collection  letters,  it  is  well  to  observe  a  slight 
mark  of  distinction  between  the  two  classes  of  collections: 
(1)  accounts  with  business  concerns;  (2)  accounts  with 
private  individuals,  such  as  retailers'  accounts  and  install- 
ment accounts. 

In  the  first  classification,  we  deal  with  business  men  on  a 
business  subject  with  which  they  are  thoroughly  familiar 
from  daily  contact.  In  the  other  class,  we  are  dealing  with 
individuals  not  with  a  highly  developed  business  sense  on 
the  average  and  not  constantly  in  contact  with  business 
matters.  The  method  of  appeal  in  handling  the  two  classes 
of  readers,  of  course,  varies  somewhat. 

To  be  effective  the  collection  letter,  like  the  sales  letter, 
must  have  personality.  A  touch  of  the  "human  interest" 
element  in  a  collection  letter  will  get  next  to  a  man  where 
mere  conventional  forms  would  do  little  more  than  irritate 
and  antagonize. 

Sometimes  a  single  letter  with  a  strong  "human  interest" 
element  will  catch  the  favorable  attention  of  debtors  and 
effect  a  settlement  promptly,  but  often  a  series  of  three, 
four,  or  even  five  letters,  each  a  little  more  insistent  than 
the  previous  one,  is  required. 


112       BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

The  First  Letter. — The  first  letter  should  be  merely  a 
courteous  reminder  that  the  account  is  overdue.  It  is  weli 
to  assume  that  failure  to  settle  the  account  promptly  is 
due  to  an  oversight.  Do  not  intimate  that  you  have  any 
doubt  of  the  customer's  intention  or  ability  to  pay. 

.It  is  often  a  good  plan  to  inject  a  special  sales  paragraph 
in  the  first  letter,  telling  in  a  friendly  way  about  goods  in 
which  the  customer  might  be  interested.  The  object  of 
such  a  paragraph  is  not  so  much  to  make  sales  as  to  appeal 
for  payment  by  means  of  a  friendly  attitude,  though  letters 
so  constructed  often  accomplish  both  objects. 

Here  is  an  example  of  a  courteous,  businesslike  reminder 
to  which  no  customer  could  take  offense: 

Dear  Sir: 

Is  this  your  understanding? 

Our  records  show  that  the  terms  on  which  you  pur- 
chased (quantity  and  style  of  product)  were  $125.15, 
less  2  %  payable  in  ten  days,  or  net  in  thirty  days  from  the 
date  of  invoice;    but  no  payment  has  yet  been  received. 

Apparently  the  account  has  escaped  the  attention  of 
your  Bookkeeping  Department,  or  possibly  we  are  in 
some  way  at  fault.  In  order  to  have  your  account  promptly 
adjusted  so  that  it  will  not  appear  overdue,  please  use 
the  enclosed  envelope  for  the  payment,  or  for  some  ex- 
planation on  which  we  may  base  a  satisfactory  adjustment. 

May  we  hear  from  you  before  the  25th,  the  day  on  which 
we  again  take  up  overdue  accounts? 

Very  truly, 

Notice  how  this  letter  presents  the  matter  fully,  firmly, 
and  yet  tactfully  to  the  past  due  debtor.  The  opening 
paragraph — but  one  sentence — makes  a  frank  and  friendly 
appeal  for  a  "get-together"  spirit.  The  letter  in  no  way 
censures  the  reader  for  his  tardiness.  It  merely  calls  his 
attention  to  the  fact  that  the  account  has  not  been  paid 
and  should  be  immediately  adjusted.  This  letter  is  particu- 
larly noteworthy,  because  it  gets  entirely  away  from  the 
hackneyed  terms  "remittance,"   "check  to  balance,"  etc. 


THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  113 

Here  is  another  letter  sent  out  by  one  of  the  largest 
manufacturing  concerns  in  the  country  to  its  dealers.  This, 
too,  shows  a  clear  understanding  of  the  customer's  position: 

Dear  Sir: 

Just  as  a  strictly  business  proposition,  the  $63.85  you 
owe  us  should  have  been  paid  sometime  ago. 

However,  circumstances  don't  permit  a  man  to  live  up 
to  his  agreements  in  every  instance.  We  understand  how 
poor  collections,  slow  business,  and  the  like  sometimes 
prevent  a  man  from  paying  when  he  expects  to. 

But  in  order  that  we  may  know  positively  that  you 
have  good  reasons  for  not  paying,  we  ask  that  you  write 
us  what  the  cause  has  been.  Then  we  won't  form  the 
wrong  opinion  of  you. 

The  number  of  days  this  account  is  past  due  makes  it 
imperative  that  it  be  paid  by  the  20th  of  this  month. 
Please  arrange  to  send  us  your  check  for  $63.85  on  or 
before  that  date. 

Yours  very  truly, 

Picture  the  feelings  of  a  small  country  dealer,  hard 
pressed  himself  by  poor  collections  and  perhaps  finding 
business  coming  none  too  plentifully,  when  he  receives  a 
courteous  letter  like  this  one  that  so  completely  realizes  his 
difficulties.  The  dealer  may  rightfully  feel  that  the  manu- 
facturer is  desirous  of  extending  every  possible  considera- 
tion to  him,  if  he  honestly  requires  an  extension.  And  ob- 
serve how  the  letter  forestalls  objections,  and  deftly  asks 
for  a  satisfactory  explanation  or  the  money.  This  is  an 
instance  where  the  letter  is  successful  because  the  collection 
man  really  knows  the  man  that  he  is  writing  to  and  can 
sympathize  with  him. 

The  following  is  a  rather  brief,  but  very  effective  letter: 

Gentlemen : 

Your  cashier  has  probably  overlooked  or  mislaid  our 
recent  statement  showing  $40.32  for  invoice  of  September  15. 

Aside  from  the  fact  that  the  bill  is  due  and  therefore 
ought  to  be  paid,  we  would  like  the  money,  and  shall 
appreciate  the  prompt  action  we  are  confident  you  will 
take. 


114       BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

By  the  way,  we  have  on  hand  about  250  reams  of  bond 
paper  that  we  bought  before  the  recent  advance  in  price. 
We  are  offering  this  to  our  customers  at  9c.  Examine 
carefully  the  sample,  and  you  will  be  convinced  that  this 
is  a  bargain  at  the  price.  Why  not  include  an  order  for 
some  of  this  paper  along  with  your  reply? 

Very  truly  yours, 

And  here  is  another  short,  but  pointed  first  letter: 

Gentlemen: 

This  will  remind  you  of  the  statement  of  your  account 
sent  you  on  October  15,  amounting  to  $87.29. 

The  balance  is  now  somewhat  overdue,  and  we  ask  that 
you  let  us  have  your  check  in  settlement  by  early  mail. 

Yours  truly, 

The  Second  Letter. — If  the  first  letter,  framed  along 
lines  similar  to  these  specimens,  fails  to  bring  a  remittance 
or  a  reply  within  a  reasonable  time,  a  second  letter,  slightly 
firmer  in  tone,  should  be  sent. 

But  even  now  it  is  not  safe  to  conclude  that  the  customer 
has  any  desire  to  evade  payment.  It  may  be  that  circum- 
stances prevent  him  from  paying  the  amount  due,  although 
he  plans  to  make  payment  just  as  soon  as  possible,  and  that 
pride  or  a  natural  reticence  keeps  him  from  making  an  ex- 
planation. 

In  such  a  case  it  is  very  easy  to  antagonize  a  worth- 
while customer  by  overinsistence.  It  is  not  yet  time  for 
harsh  measures.  Give  the  customer  credit  for  intending 
to  pay  his  bills  until  his  action  convinces  you  conclusively 
that  he  does  not  intend  to  pay  them. 

Here  is  a  good  specimen  of  a  second  letter: 

Gentlemen: 

The  check  you  intended  to  send  us  in  payment  of  your 
account  has  not  yet  arrived — no  doubt  forgotten. 

Don't  bother  to  write  a  letter;  just  pin  your  check  to 
this  letter  and  mail  back  to  us. 

Thank  you! 

Very  truly  yours, 


THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  115 

This  letter  has  been  remarkably  successful,  due  probably 
to  its  brevity  and  pOintedness,  which  are  gained  without 
sacrificing  pleasantness. 

A  concern  dealing  largely  with  merchants  in  small  towns 
uses  this  letter  to  advantage  as  a  second  mailing: 

Dear  Sir: 

Perhaps  you  have  overlooked  the  fact  that  you  are 
owing  us  $119.20,  which  is  now  twenty-four  days  past 
due.  For  that  reason  we  are  taking  this  opportunity  of 
reminding  you  of  it. 

Your  honesty  is  not  doubted  in  the  least,  Mr.  Fuller, 
but  as  a  business  man,  you  realize  that  we  can  not  allow 
an  account  to  stand  open  as  long  as  this  one  has  without 
sufficient  reason  being  given  for  it.  This  you  do  not  seem 
to  have  been  inclined  to  give  us,  and  we  naturally  con- 
clude that  it  is  just  a  matter  of  taking  care  of  the  account 
whenever  you  can  find  time. 

You  are  doing  yourself  a  great  injustice  in  not  taking 
care  of  your  account.  Uncertain  credit  standing  is  a  great 
detriment  to  a  business  man,  for  it  means  that  those  from 
whom  he  makes  his  purchases  will  have  a  lack  of  confidence 
in  his  ability  to  meet  his  obligations.  And,  too,  if  they 
are  not  disposed  to  be  as  lenient  as  we  have  been  with 
you  and  should  get  a  judgment  in  court,  the  merchant's 
reputation  in  the  community  is  lowered  and  he  also  has 
court  costs  to  pay,  Aiaking  his  expenses  greater. 

Won't  you  consider  these  things  for  your  own  good  and 
let  us  have  your  check  for  $119.20  by  return  mail,  or  at  least 
tell  us  why  you  have  not  paid  your  account? 

Yours  truly, 

This  letter  is  designed  particularly  to  bring  the  procrasti- 
nating debtors  to  time.  Many  merchants,  particularly  in 
the  smaller  towns,  merely  postpone  remittances  because  of 
lack  of  office  system.  Once  the  fallacy  of  such  a  delay  is 
brought  to  their  attention,  they  are  quick  to  send  in  their 
money.  Notice  the  clever  manner  in  which  the  danger  of 
neglect  is  visualized  to  the  reader  without  the  use  of  any 
direct  threats  or  forebodings. 


116  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

The  following  is  another  letter  that  serves  as  an  admirable 
second  appeal  to  the  procrastinating  debtor: 

Gentlemen: 

You  have  always  been  so  prompt  in  making  your  settle- 
ments with  us  heretofore  that  we  are  wondering  what  is 
causing  you  to  hold  up  settlement  of  our  April  24  invoice 
amounting  to  $215.25. 

Perhaps  the  reason  is  something  which  is  our  fault,  and 
which  we  could  very  easily  adjust  if  you  would  let  us  know. 
If  it  is,  won't  you  write  us  today  concerning  it? 

If,  however,  the  charges  are  correct  as  they  stand, 
will  you  kindly  send  us  your  check  for  the  amount  by 
return  mail? 

Very  truly, 

Let  us  here  glance  back  over  these  successful  money- 
getting  letters  and  determine  what  common  factors  contrib- 
uted to  their  effectiveness. 

Up  to  this  point,  the  writer  has  assumed  that  the  debtor 
has  every  intention  of  meeting  his  obligations,  and  rightly, 
for  the  customer  has  not  yet  indicated  by  his  actions  that 
he  is  to  be  classified  as  a  "dead  beat." 

In  each  case  a  direct  request  for  the  money  is  made.  The 
customer  voluntarily  incurred  an  obligation.  When  buying 
the  goods,  he  knew  that  they  must  be  paid  for.  Therefore, 
the  writer  of  collection  letters  has  every  right  to  expect 
payment  as  soon  as  the  account  becomes  due.  He  is  en- 
tirely within  his  province  in  making  a  courteous,  firm 
request  for  payment. 

But  there  is  no  reason  why  one  should  "suggest,"  "beg 
the  favor  of,"  or  "respectfully  direct  attention  to"  a  remit- 
tance. Such  weakness  indicates  a  doubt  about  the  returns. 
They  do  not  create  the  affirmative  impression  that  payment 
is  expected  as  a  matter  of  course.  This  is  the  angle  from 
which  the  collection  letter  must  be  written — prompt  pay- 
ment is  expected — not  asked  for  as  a  personal  favor  or  for 
any  other  irrelevant  reason.    The  transaction  is  a  matter 


THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  117 

of  business  throughout.  Payment  should  be  expected  on  a 
business  basis. 

The  function  of  the  collection  letter  is  to  tell  the  reader 
that  you  expect  him  to  pay  sl  certain  amount  of  money 
within  a  certain  specified  time.  And  there  is  no  reason  why 
you  should  not  speak  plainly.  The  appeal  should  be  di- 
rected straight  at  the  reader's  honesty.  There  must  be 
nothing  to  incite  antagonism,  but  sufficient  courtesy  and 
positiveness  that  the  recipient  is  forced  to  admit  to  himself 
that  your  attitude  is  entirely  fair. 

The  Third  Letter. — If  the  first  and  the  second  letter, 
appealing  to  the  customer's  honesty,  do  not  bring  a  remit- 
tance or  a  reply,  a  third  letter  should  follow  within  a  few 
days.  While  it  should  still  assume  that  the  debtor  really 
means  to  pay,  it  should  insist  firmly  upon  an  immediate 
settlement,  or  at  least  a  reply  explaining  why  settlement 
has  not  been  made  and  naming  a  definite  time  when  pay- 
ment may  be  expected. 

Changing  from  the  appeal  to  the  debtor's  sense  of  honesty 
and  fair  play,  the  third  letter  should  be  directed  at  his 
sense  of  pride,  curiosity  or  fear.  The  tone  of  the  letters 
naturally  grows  more  insistent  as  the  series  progresses. 

Here  is  a  specimen  letter,  used  as  the  third  of  a  series, 
with  an  appeal  to  the  debtor's  pride  as  the  controlling 
factor: 

Gentlemen: 

The  position  of  your  company  is  one  of  responsibility, 
and  it  is  because  of  this  fact  that  we  so  willingly  extended 
credit. 

Now,  that  your  account,  totaling  $215.25,  has  drifted 
along  for  several  weeks,  we  fear  that  your  rightly  deserved 
standing  in  credit  matters  is  liable  to  lower  somewhat  in 
the  eyes  of  those  with  whom  you  have  business  connections. 

We  are  sure  that  you  want  your  credit  standing  to 
rank  just  as  high  and  to  be  just  as  favorable  as  possible. 
You  know,  from  your  own  experience,  the  value  of  credit. 

Do  not  let  $215.25  endanger  your  credit  reputation. 


118  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM 

Send  us  a  check  for  that  amount  without  delay,  and 
thus  preserve  your  enviable  credit  standing. 

Yours  very  truly, 

This  letter  pictures  the  debtor's  credit  standing,  stimu- 
lates his  pride  in  the  favorable  reputation  of  his  concern, 
and  then  emphasizes  the  fallacy  of  endangering  that  valuable 
position  by  neglecting  to  pay  the  account  in  question. 

The  following  is  a  good  specimen  directed  at  the  debtor's 
sense  of  shame: 

Dear  Sir: 

What  would  you  think  of  a  wide-awake  merchant  who 
unfairly  used  another's  money  to  do  business  with? 

And  what  would  you  think  of  that  same  merchant, 
when  he  neglected  to  even  explain  his  reason  for  with- 
holding that  money? 

Be  honest  and  candid  in  forming  your  opinion — for 
that  merchant  is  yourself. 

For  three  months  you  have  been  using  $145.20  of  our 
money.  We  were  glad  to  allow  you  the  use  of  it  for  thirty 
days,  to  help  you  make  a  success  of  Blank  products. 

But  you  have  used  the  money  much  longer' than  you 
promised  to  according  to  our  understanding  when  you 
placed  the  order. 

You  should  not  violate  your  contract  and  postpone 
further  settlement  of  your  account. 

We  look  forward  to  receiving  your  check  for  the  full 
amount  next  week. 

Very  truly  yours, 

The  Fourth  Letter. — If  no  reply  is  received  to  the  third 
letter  within  a  reasonable  time,  it  is  probable  that  the 
debtor  intends  to  avoid  payment.  The  fourth  letter  should 
bring  the  matter  to  a  definite  conclusion.  As  a  rule,  it 
should  set  a  definite  date  for  a  reply  and  should  state 
specifically  what  action  will  be  taken  in  case  no  reply  is 
received  by  that  date. 

It  is  here  that  letters  can  be  used  to  work  upon  the 
debtor's  curiosity  and  fear.  Of  these  two  angles  of  appeal, 
curiosity  is  many  times  the  more  resultful,  for  it  is    the 


THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  119 

unknown  danger  a  man  fears  most.     If  you  can  stimulate 
his  curiosity  regarding  a  pending  action  against  him,  the 
debtor  may  be  more  affected  than  by  the  mere  statement 
of  a  definite  action  that  is  to  be  taken. 
Notice  the  effect  of  the  following  letter: 

Gentlemen: 

If  this  letter  does  not  bring  an  answer,  we  must  pass 
your  account  of  $145.20,  now  more  than  three  months 
overdue,  to  our  energetic  and  inventive  Treasurer. 

We  can  not  understand  why  you  have  allowed  your 
account  to  drag  along  without  attention.  Manifestly, 
there  is  no  reason  why  you  should  not  pay  this  account, 
or  we  would  have  heard  from  you  to  that  effect. 

You  voluntarily  incurred  this  obligation  when  you 
bought  the  goods.  You  were  fully  aware  of  the  terms  ap- 
plying to  the  purchase.  Yet  you  have  not  heeded  our 
courteous  requests  for  a  remittance. 

We  expect  you  to  pay  this  bill.  We  don't  want  to  be 
forced  to  give  your  name  to  our  Treasurer,  for  it  is  ex- 
tremely probable  that  he  will  instantly  take  steps  that 
will  cause  you  considerable  surprise  and  amazement. 

Yours  truly. 

Such  a  letter,  giving  a  straightforward  recital  of  the 
facts  of  the  case,  puts  the  responsibility  for  future  develop- 
ments entirely  on  the  debtor's  shoulders.  And  the  mention 
of  steps  that  will  cause  great  "surprise  and  amazement"  will 
cause  the  reader  to  wonder  whether  it  is  quite  the  best 
thing  to  further  procrastinate  in  remitting. 

When  we  take  up  the  element  of  injecting  fear  into 
collection  letters,  the  account  must  necessarily  have  pro- 
gressed to  the  point  where  collection  through  the  courts  is 
a  near  possibility.  The  purpose  of  such  a  letter,  however — 
and  this  is  an  important  consideration — is  to  bring  the  money 
in,  not  merely  to  pave  the  way  for  the  suit. 

And  remember  that  the  attorney  should  not  be*  resorted 
to,  nor  even  suggested  in  the  letters,  until  every  other 
possibility  has  been  exhausted. 

Such  a  letter  should  be  terse  and  conclusive.     There 


120        BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

should  be  an  air  of  finality  about  the  letter  so  that  the 
reader  may  realize  the  earnestness  and  seriousness  of  his 
position. 

The  following  is  a  good  specimen  of  a  collection  letter 
that  appeals  to  the  customer's  sense  of  fear: 

Gentlemen: 

You  have  compelled  us  to  take  the  unpleasant  step  of 
informing  our  attorneys  of  your  neglect  to  settle  your  ac- 
count of  April  15,  amounting  to  $145.20. 

We  dislike  to  take  this  forcible  step,  but  your  failure 
to  attend  to  your  indebtedness  gives  us  no  alternative. 

Of  course,  you  appreciate  the  time  you  will  lose  in 
court,  the  harmful  publicity,  the  lowering  of  your  credit, 
and    the    inevitable    payment    of    the    account,    together     ' 
with  court  costs,  that  such  a  suit  will  cause  you. 

Follow  our  friendly  and  sincere  advice  to  settle  your 
account  before  our  attorneys  are  called  in.  It  is  dis- 
tinctly to  your  advantage  to  avoid  any  such  unbusiness- 
like affair. 

We  shall  expect  your  check  for  the  full  amount  of  your 
account  by  the  15th  of  this  month.  You  owe  it  to  your- 
self to  see  that  it  reaches  us  in  ample  time. 

Yours  very  truly, 

A  letter  such  as  this  presents  the  case  to  the  debtor  fully 
and  definitely,  yet  in  such  a  manner  that  a  direct  remittance 
can  be  sent  without  any  humiliation  on  the  part  of  the 
customer. 

The  function  of  such  a  letter  as  this  should  be  to  offer 
the  reader  every  possible  opening  for  a  direct  settlement. 
Remember  that  the  purpose  of  this  letter  is  not  merely  to 
serve  notice  that  the  account  is  to  be  placed  with  your 
attorneys;   it  is  a  final  endeavor  to  collect  the  account. 

Failure  on  the  part  of  the  debtor  to  make  remittance  on 
the  specified  date  should  be  met  with  prompt  action  by  the 
attorneys.  This  step  being  taken,  the  debtor  must,  of 
course,  deal  in  the  future  with  your  legal  representatives. 

All  the  principles  mentioned,  while  applying  specifically 
to  the  manufacturer  or  other  concern  catering  to  a  wide 


*  THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  121 

trade  area,  are  equally  applicable  to  the  local  field.  There 
are,  however,  one  or  two  angles  of  collection  work  peculiar 
to  the  retailer  exclusively. 

Here,  an  individual  is  dealt  with.  Then,  too,  as  in  the 
case  of  a  charge  customer  of  a  department  store,  the  col- 
lection is  a  matter  of  monthly  occurrence. 

When  credit  arrangements  are  made  and  the  account 
opened,  the  terms  should  be  explicitly  stated.  One  retail 
establishment  that  has  had  marked  success  with  its  collec- 
tions sends  to  each  new  charge  customer  an  engraved  card 
with  this  wording: 

The  Blank  Department  Store  has  opened  an  account 
with  (name  of  customer). 

Itemized  bills  will  be  rendered  the  last  of  each  month, 
and  payment  is  due  the  10th  of  the  month  following  date 
of  purchase.  Deviations  from  this  rule  should  be  by 
previous  arrangements. 

Again,  the  basic  idea  that  payments  are  expected  within 
a  certain  specified  period  makes  the  task  of  the  collection 
man  the  easier. 

Statements  are  rendered  promptly  at  the  close  of  the 
month's  business  so  that  they  reach  the  customer  on  the 
first  or  the  second  day  of  the  month.  If  the  granting  of 
credit  privileges  has  been  cautious,  the  majority  of  accounts 
will  be  paid  within  thirty  days  at  the  most. 

A  month  later  a  duplicate  statement  is  mailed  accom- 
panied by  a  card  reading  like  this: 

The  Blank  Department  Store  calls  attention  to  its 
monthly  system  of  receiving  payment  for  all  purchases 
made  the  preceding  month.  The  privilege  of  settling 
accounts  by  monthly  remittances  is  extended  for  the 
convenience  of  its  customers.  Deviations  from  this  rule 
are  only  by  previous  arrangement. 

The  store  that  keeps  close  watch  on  its  collections  and 
follows  promptly  all  delays  soon  builds  a  reputation  for 


122  BUSINESS    LETTERS:    HOW    TO    WRITE    THEM  • 

expecting  timely  payments,  which  aids  materially  in  making 
collections. 

Installment  accounts,  whether  handled  by  a  retailer  or 
by  a  mail-order  house,  present  peculiarities  all  their  own. 
Here,  instant  and  drastic  action  must  be  taken  as  soon  as 
payment  becomes  overdue.  The  reason  a  customer  makes 
a  purchase  on  the  installment  plan  is  to  avail  himself  of  the 
"easy  payments."  These  payments  are,  as  a  rule,  of  an 
amount  the  customer  can  comfortably  pay  at  the  specified 
intervals.  Inasmuch  as  a  customer  who  buys  on  such 
terms  does  so  because  he  can  not  pay  more  than  one  install- 
ment at  a  time,  it  is  very  essential  that  the  first  letter  be 
made  impressive  enough  to  inspire  prompt  action. 

More  than  half  of  the  fight  is  won,  if  in  the  early  stages 
of  the  transaction  every  installment  is  collected.  There 
is  no  accumulated  overdue  amount,  and  the  customer 
understands  that  each  payment  is  expected  when  due. 

The  following  letter  is  sent  to  installment  buyers,  following 
the  mailing  of  regular  notices  of  payments  due: 

Dear  Sir: 

We  have  not  received  any  response  to  our  recent  notices 
for  the  payment  that  has  matured  on  your  contract,  and  are 
wondering  what  the  trouble  may  be.  Of  course,  you  would 
not  delay  your  payments  without  a  very  good  reason, 
but  in  the  absence  of  any  explanation  we  are  naturally 
puzzled.  A  frank  explanation  of  your  position  will  doubt- 
less ^void  a  misunderstanding. 

When  we  accepted  your  contract,  we  assumed  that  its 
terms  were  entirely  satisfactory  to  you  and  that  you 
entered  into  the  agreement  with  the  expectation  of  meet- 
ing each  payment  promptly  at  maturity.  You  will  surely 
agree  that  this  is  a  reasonable  assumption  and  that  it  is 
equally  reasonable  for  us  to  expect  an  explanation  when 
anything  occurs  to  prevent  your  paying  on  this  basis. 
It  is  only  fair  to  yourself  to  inform  us  and  leave  no  room 
for  any  question  concerning  your  good  faith.  We  are  not 
hasty  to  draw  conclusions,  but  we  are  human;  and  you 
should  not  leave  too  much  to  our  imagination. 


THE  COLLECTION  LETTER  123 

It  is  not  our  desire  to  annoy  you  about  these  payments 
or  to  write  insisting  letters  to  get  you  to  fulfill  your  agree- 
ment; this  should  not  be  necessary.  It  would  be  much 
easier  for  you  to  pay  one  installment  at  a  time  than  to 
allow  several  to  accumulate;  and  if  you  pay  according  to 
agreement,  we  can  handle  the  account  in  our  regular  routine. 
It  is,  therefore,  to  our  mutual  advantage  to  have  these 
payments  made  regularly  and  promptly. 

Kindly  write  us  by  return  mail  or  send  a  check  for 
$10  to  cover  the  overdue  installment. 

Very  truly  yours, 

A  letter  such  as  this,  while  lengthy  and  quite  stern  in 
tone,  can  be  used  to  splendid  advantage  in  handling  install- 
ment collections.  In  such  cases,  strenuous  efforts  must  be 
taken  at  once,  for  collection  difficulties  multiply  when 
overdue  payments  pile  up. 

But  in  every  instance,  individual  conditions  must,  to  a 
great  extent,  control  the  substance  and  tone  of  the  collection 
letter.  There  can  be  no  hard  and  fast,  arbitrary  rules  that 
can  be  followed  under  any  and  all  circumstances. 

As  in  all  other  lines  of  endeavor,  success  in  collections 
depends  upon  the  skill  with  which  known  principles  and 
standard  modes  of  procedure  are  adapted  to  the  particular 
case  up  for  attention. 

Exercise  14 

Smith  &  Wood,  Omaha,  Nebraska,  owe  you  $128.35.  Write  them 
calling  attention  to  the  fact  that  the  account  is  now  twenty  days  past 
due.  In  a  special  sales  paragraph  call  attention  to  the  fact  that  be- 
cause you  are  moving  into  new  quarters,  you  are  offering  a  special 
discount  of  20%  on  all  office  desks  and  10%  on  all  chairs  listed  in 
your  catalogue.  These  are  especially  attractive  values  for  the  reason 
that  furniture  is  constantly  advancing  in  price. 

You  have  received  no  reply  from  Smith  &  Wood  to  the  letter  you 
wrote  them  two  weeks  ago,  asking  for  a  remittance.  Write  them  a 
second  letter. 

Write  Smith  &  Wood  a  third  letter  calling  their  attention  to  the 
fact  that  you  have  received  no  acknowledgment  of  your  two  previous 
letters.    You  can  not  understand  this,  as  the  character  of  their  refer- 


124       BUSINESS  letters:  how  to  write  them 

ences  were  such  as  to  lead  you  to  believe  that  they  would  meet  their 
obligations  promptly.  Tell  them  that  if  you  do  not  receive  a  remit- 
tance by  (give  date),  you  will  draw  on  them  through  the  First  Na- 
tional Bank  of  their  city. 

Not  having  received  a  reply  to  your  third  letter  to  Smith  &  Wood, 
you  drew  a  draft  on  them,  which  was  returned  unpaid.  Write  them 
mentioning  that  the  draft  was  returned  and  informing  them  that  if 
you  do  not  receive  a  remittance  by  (give  date),  you  will  turn  the 
account  over  to  your  attorneys  with  instructions  to  take  steps  imme- 
diately to  enforce  collection.  Explain  why  it  is  to  their  advantage  to 
remit  direct  and  thus  avoid  a  suit. 

Howard  &  Sons,  Altoona,  Pa.,  owe  you  $165.25  on  account.  They 
send  a  check  for  $75,  and  ask  you  to  extend  the  balance  thirty  days. 
Write  them  acknowledging  receipt  of  the  check  and  granting  the  ex- 
tension. 

Mr.  W.  H.  Jennings,  Sumner,  Iowa,  who  owes  the  National  Grocery 
Company,  Waterloo,  Iowa,  $180  on  account,  asks  them  to  accept 
his  60-day  note  with  interest  at  six  percent  for  one-half  the  amount 
and  to  extend  the  time  of  payment  of  the  other  half  thirty  days.  He 
states  that  crops  are  poor,  and  consequently  trade  has  fallen  off  and 
collections  are  slow.  Write  the  letter  from  Mr.  Jennings  to  the  Na- 
tional Grocery  Co. 

Write  a  reply  from  the  National  Grocery  Co.  to  Mr.  Jennings, 
explaining  that  they  do  not  usually  extend  the  term  of  payment,  but 
in  this  instance  they  are  willing  to  do  it. 


Miscellaneous  Exercise 

B.  J.  Andrews,  who  is  opening  a  retail  hardware  and  implement 
store  at  Dublin,  Va.,  orders  from  the  Barker-Jennings  Hardware  Co., 
Lynchburg,  Virginia,  the  following:  2  doz.  baker  P.  knives;  1  doz. 
barlow  knives;  4  do^.  baker  razors;  3  doz.  clipper  mowing  blades. 
He  gives  as  reference  0.  M.  Jordan,  Manager  of  the  Pulaski  Hard- 
ware Co.,  by  whom  he  was  employed  for  a  number  of  years.  Write 
the  order  from  B.  J.  Andrews  to  the  Barker- Jennings  Hardware 
Company. 

Write  the  letter  from  the  Barker- Jennings  Hardware  Company  to 
O.  M.  Jordan,  requesting  him  to  give  you  an  opinion  as  to  the  integ- 
rity, business  ability  and  financial  standing  of  Mr.  Andrews. 

Write  the  reply  from  Mr.  Jordan  to  the  Barker-Jennings  Hardware 
Co.  Mr.  Andrews  was  employed  for  six  years  by  Mr.  Jordan.  Give 
a  favorable  report  of   Mr.   Andrews. 


MISCELLANEOUS  EXERCISE  125 

Write  the  letter  from  the  Barker-Jennings  Hardware  Company  to 
B.  J.  Andrews,  acknowledging  receipt  of  the  order.  State  that  they 
are  glad  to  open  an  account,  as  Mr.  Jordan  has  spoken  very  favorably 
of  him.    Tell  him  the  goods  have  been  shipped  by  express  as  ordered. 

WANTED. — Young  man  with  thorough  knowledge  of  bookkeep- 
ing. State  age,  experience  and  salary  expected.  Must  be  accurate 
and  rapid. 

Answer  the  above  advertisement.  Training:  High  school  graduate 
and  graduate  of  the  (give  name  of  school  you  are  attending).  Expe- 
rience: Two  years  with  (give  name  of  some  firm  you  know).  Refer- 
ence: J.  M.  Brown,  of  the  firm  mentioned,  and  name  of  the  instructor 
in  the  Bookkeeping  Department  of  the  school  you  are  attending. 

Write  a  letter  to  J.  B.  Williams  &  Son,  Lima,  Ohio,  calling  atten- 
tion to  the  fact  that  their  account  of  $114.16  is  past  due.  This  is  the 
first  letter.     The  company  has  heretofore  been  prompt  in  remitting. 

Harrington,  Willis  &  Co.,  Kansas  City,  Mo.,  owe  you  a  bill  amount- 
ing to  $96.48.  You  have  repeatedly  sent  them  statements  and  re- 
quests for  payment,  to  which  they  have  paid  no  attention.  Prepare 
a  final  letter  requesting  payment.  Make  it  plain  that  you  will  have  to 
resort  to  the  courts  unless  a  remittance  is  received  before  the  25th  of 
the  month. 

A  customer  orders  from  Baird-North  Co.,  Providence,  R.  I.,  1915 
catalogue;  1  waterman  fountain  pen,  No.  22884;  1  pair  gold  cuflf 
links.  No.  8825;  2  scarf  pins,  No.  9710;  3  ivory  fans.  No.  24382.  He 
requests  that  the  cuff  links  be  engraved  with  the  initials  "L.  B." 
Write  the  order. 

Write  a  letter  from  Baird-North  Co.,  addressed  to  J.  B.  Wilson, 
Flint,  Mich.,  acknowledging  receipt  of  the  order.  Tell  how  and  when 
the  goods  will  be  shipped.  Explain  that  there  will  be  a  delay  of  a 
day  or  two,  as  the  Engraving  Departme'^t  is  behind  with  work. 

The  goods  ordered  from  the  Baird-North  Co.  were  intended  for 
Christmas  presents,  but  as  they  were  delivered  on  December  26, 
they  could  not  be  used  for  this  purpose,  and  the  customer  returned 
them.  Write  the  letter  from  the  customer  informing  Baird-North 
Co.  that  he  is  returning  the  goods. 

Write  the  reply  from  Baird-North  Co.  Explain  that  it  is  satisfac- 
tory to  return  the  goods,  with  the  exception  of  the  cuff  links,  which 
were  engraved,  and  are  not  subject  to  return  or  exchange,  as  stated 
on  page  2  of  the  catalogue.  Remember  that  the  customer  is  to  be  sat- 
isfied as  to  the  fairness  of  your  position. 


YB  30929 


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UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA  UBRARY 


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